A note from the editor: Alright, once again I've decided to edit the work of Mr Athrun Zala and Mr Shinn Asuka. I am also told that, for this chapter, they have enlisted the help of one, Kira Yamato, as his knowledge of crazy redheads far surpasses that of our two authors. So, once again I'll leave you in the capable hands of our authors, and resign to the knowledge that it was me who attempted to fix their insomnia enduced spelling mistakes. Attempted being the oppretive word here.
A note from the authors: Okay, like our editor has already said, there is a third author for this chapter. As the first person amoung our group to experience handling a crazy redhead, we felt it was right. Welcome Kira Yamato to this guide for this all important chapter.
We say all important, because crazy redheads are possibly the most effective at screwing up your feelings. Now, two of the crazy redheads we've delt with were actually lovely people, and we do not wish to spread bad rumours about them.However, it is important for you young idio ... soldiers to realise that emotional turmileis not a good thing when you're trying to stay alive. Hence, the chapter on crazy redheads.
Read all the way through and pay attention for the love of all that's holy.
1) Well, first things first, there's two types of crazy redhead. The first is an emotionally traumnatized physco bitch who manipulates your feelings and convinces you that she loves you and you need to love her back. This is the type to avoid, because you will, I repeat will, end up falling for her and that is not going to help your mental state. The second type is genuinly in love with you, and genuinly wants to help you and is willing to live with the fact that you mightn't love them back. This is the type that it is safe to communicate with, as long as you're capable of taking the consiquences.
2) Okay then, you've just had a traumatising experience and your emotional and mental state has been better. This is usually the time the first type of crazy redhead preys on you. Avoid all contact with the crazy redhead. Stay in a tight group of people that you know are your friends. And don't, I mean don't, be caught in your bedroom alone.
3) Alright, you've just done something monumentally stupid, and you know it was monumentally stupid. The second type of crazy redhead comes in here, and through a mix of crying and forgiving makes you feel that it wasn't quite so monumentally stupid. All well and good, but you need to understand that you've been a complete idiot, so you'll understand that this is also a situation to avoid. It leaves you feeling arrogent and convinced of your own misguided rightousness.
4) Fights, fights, fights, serious emotional confusion on your part. Which too choose, crazy blond chick or crazy redhead. Yeah, not a situation to get into.
5) Dear oh dear, your best friend the crazy blonde clone secretly has a crush on your crazy redhead. That, or your very good friend is engaged to your crazy redhead. Or, the sister of your crazy redhead is unbelieveably angry with you because you delibratly put her sister in danger. Crazy redhead is either organising the whole show or as utterly bewildered as you are. Avoid the situation, please.
6) The crazy redhead will either attempt to save your life, or you will attempt to save theirs. This is always going to end up with you getting severally hurt, so best not to try it folks.
7) It is completely alright to develope a relationship with a crazy redhead, just as it is alright to develope one with a crazy blonde chick. Just know that you're either going to be the victim of bad press or the poor kid who gets all the angsty stuff and fifty different 'the world is all against me' style stories. It's your funneral.
8) Your councilor and fully stocked first aid kit is still needed. Always have them on you.
9) Coffee, coffee, coffee, where would you be without it? Always have a cup when dealing with a crazy redhead.
10) Well, we don't really have another rule, so just memorise the other nine. That, by the way, is an order.
A note from the authors: Okay, if you're reading this, then you've read the chapter. What can we say?
A note from the editor: Ignore the coffee rule, unless you're a coffee addicted insomniac. Other then that, any offense to the lovely people is undoubtly unintended by our exhausted authors. I hope you have enjoyed this, and I'm happy to announce that the next guide is underway. Apperantly, suicideal ships captains are worth learning how deal with. See you next time.
Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue, don't ask.
Readers of this guide are thanked from the bottom of my heart. And last but not least, please review?