I'm so sorry it has taken me so long to update but due to my 8 month old having health problems I had to take some time off. But things are better with him now thank god, and i'm able to come back and give you guys more. Thanks to everyone who has reveiwed this story and to those of you who are still reading. I promised to update more now things have slowed down here.

Chapter 12

Nikki walked in the front door with Paul following close behind her, laying her clutch bag on the welcome table she headed for the stairs only to be pulled back to Paul by his arm around her waist.

"Where do you think you are going?" Paul spoke as Nikki pushed against him trying to give herself some space.

"To my room to sleep."

"Tonight is our wedding night and you still wish to sleep in that cold room by yourself instead of with your husband where I can make sure you stay warm so warm in fact we will need no clothes."

"Incase you have forgotten there is a fireplace in my bedroom so there is no need for you or your warmth." Nikki pushed hard against his chest slipping away from him. Paul grabbed her left hand in his and ran his thumb over the rings then gave her a sadistic smile.

"Incase you have forgotten, I told you you could stay in that room by yourself only until our wedding night." He slid his other arm back around her waist. "Tonight is our wedding night and to honest I'm sick to death of being in that room all night with only my hand and a few movies to keep me company." Nikki rolled her eyes. "Now you can follow me upstairs willing or I can drag you upstairs like some kind of cave man."

"I know you were evil and heartless but I still can't believe you are going to force me to have sex with you. There is a word for that it's called rape."

"It's called collecting payment for keeping you sorry excuse for a grandfather out of jail. Now what's it going to be?"

Nikki looked down at her hand were Paul continued to rub his thumb over the rings and her finger. "If you truly love me Paul why are you treating me like some whore off the street?" she fought the tears.

"You know as well as I do that I would never treat a whore as good I have treated you so far." He leaned forward next to her ear. "I would have done got my payment from a whore on the first night." Nikki choked on a sob. "Now will you give me a kiss or do I have to take it?"

"I will forever hate you for this."

"I can live with that."

Swallowing nervously she raised her mouth to his with a reluctant obedience. Instead of the passionate onslaught she'd expected and feared he was gentle with her. His lips moving with a strange mesmerizing sweetness the tip of his tongue coaxing her to responses that she dared not risk. She stood rigid in his arms, willing the kiss to end but knowing that it would not until he got what he wanted from her. At least he lifted his head with a rueful sigh.

"You lack warmth darling, but that will change soon." And with that he clasped his hand around hers and began pulling her up the stairs with him.

Once upstairs she pulled her hand free from his and stopped, Paul turned looking at her. "Can I at least go to my room and change into something else?" Paul nodded after a moment's hesitation then continued walking into his bedroom. Letting go of the breath she had been holding Nikki walked into her room and closed the door behind her. She walked over to her bed and sat down covering her face with her hands. "My God," she whispered running her hands down her face catching a glimpse of herself in the mirror, she looked pale her eyes looking almost bruised. "How can I do this? He's not the same guy I used to love? Everyone was right he is a monster? I have to find some way out of this." Standing she grabbed her white nightgown from her dresser and threw it on her dressing table then sat on the bench in front.

She knew she wasn't alone even though she never heard the door open she knew Paul was standing the doorway. She raised her head and met his gaze in the mirror, wearing a white terry cloth robe and his hair damp he was standing in the doorway behind her.

"I was hoping to find you in my bed."

"My dress," she used the first excuse that came to mind. "I couldn't reach…"

"Why didn't you come to me?" His hands closed on her shoulders, gently urging her to her feet. She felt the tiny hooks on her bodice give way, and faint rasp of the zipper as he lowered it. She felt his mouth touch the nape of her neck and move with a gentleness to her shoulder pushing away the thin strap baring the skin for his lips to touch. She felt the dress slip down her body, and clutched it with both hands as the first dangerous and uncontrollable tremor of need quivered through her body. This was the Paul that she knew and loved, the Paul that she remembered and wanted. The man that made her smile no matter how pissed off she was.

He turned her slowly to face him, his mouth seeking hers. "I love you Nikki." He whispered just before closing his lips on her.

As he kissed her she turned her face away sharply, so his mouth grazed her cheek. "No, Paul, I can't do this. Please."

He paused with a frown. His hands cupped her face, making her look at him. "What's the matter?"

"I can't do this. I thought I could but I can't. It's impossible."

He put his arms around her, his hands slipping inside the loosened dress gently stroking her naked back making her shiver and burn.

"What is so impossible?"

"You, me, this."

"Just a minute ago you wanted this? You are the most confusing woman I have ever met and that's what I love about you, but right now that it starting to irritate me." He kissed her shoulder. "There is nothing to be scared of; you know I would never hurt you."

"How can you say that when downstairs you told you would rape me if I didn't come upstairs willing." Nikki wrapped her arms around her top to keep her dress from falling and pushed away from him. "And now you're loving and gentle and…and…I don't know what to do or who you are anymore. And I can't do this with you tonight." Pulling the straps back up on her shoulders. "Before you told me you would be patient with me."

"I have been patient with you. I could have had you several times before now but I waited until tonight, I held back and waited for the moment you were my wife."

"You call this a marriage, what we have is a deal." Nikki voice rose. "An agreement that's it nothing else."

"One of which you agreed to."

"I never thought about the personal implications until now and I'm sorry but I need some time."

"You never thought about until now, not even when you were in my arms did you think about it." He gave a harsh laugh scaring her. "That's a lie if I ever heard one. While you consider that consider this, why should I keep the terms of our agreement if you don't?"

"You mean to tell me that you throw him back in jail if I don't sleep with you." She let out hoarsely after a long pause.

"If you can break your word so easily then so can I." He paused. "Or maybe you would care to reconsider my wife. After all we have all night. And surely for the sake of her grandfather you can endure this minor incovenice. But do not make me wait long." He added coldly then turned walking to the door. "And this time you will come to me." She watched as the door closed behind him.

After a long while of staring at the closed door Nikki released the dress from her grasp allowing it to fall to the floor then pulled the white silk nightgown over her head and headed for the door across the hall to his room. The door of his room of cracked she pushed it open and stepped in the lamp lit silence.

Paul lay on his bed propped up on his elbow watching her enter the room, savoring his victory. He pulled back the cover, telling her without saying it that he wished she join him. Reluctantly she obeyed, lying rigid beside him aware of the thud in her chest, even more aware of him naked beside her. "God I've waited so long for this moment." He bent his head and kissed her, lips moving coaxingly on her unresponsive mouth while his hand slid down to the neckline of her nightgown brushing the straps off her shoulders. "You look beautiful in this but I think it would look better on the floor." He whispered before closing his mouth on the rounded softness he'd uncovered, his tongue laving its engorged peak. His hand drifted slowly downwards over her body, exploring each and every curve through the thin fabric.

She felt his fingers linger on her hip then move inwards across the flat plane of her stomach with purpose while his mouth sought her with intensity.

She moved, frantically, both hands capturing his and dragging it away from her body. "Don't touch me there."

Paul was still for a minute then he sighed. He took her hand and raised it to his lips caressing the palm. "Don't fight me again. Just relax and enjoy."

"I just want this over with."

"You mean you don't want the foreplay you used to beg me for? Surely you don't mean that?"

"Yes I do. I'm sick of this pretence that I'm anything more to you than another girl in your bed marriage or no marriage. I can't bear to touched or kissed by you, so just do it and get it over with, because I don't want you and I never will."

She flinched at his sudden harsh laugh. He released her and sat up the sheet falling away from him. "I guess you expect me to send you back to you bedroom and stay here alone and hard. Well thinks again Nikki, you will not leave until I have made our marriage a reality to you."

Before Nikki relished what was happening he had lifted himself over her, his hand pushing back her nightgown and parting her thighs with ruthless determination. She felt his fingers discover the moist silken heat that he's created, in spite of herself, heard him laugh.

"I hate you."

"That is your privilege," he said. "This is mine." Poised above her, slowly and skillfully he guided himself into her.

She lay beneath him unmoving, hardly breathing; eyes closed waiting for the pain to hit her. But it never came; she had not expected consideration and probably did not deserve the gentleness. But he gave them.

It wasn't like the other times he had made love her, this time was strictly sex for him and made it known to her. There were no more kisses or caresses, apart from their bodies being joined there was no other physical contact. His weight was supported by his arms, clamped at the sides of the bed. When he began to move, it was without haste, the drive of his body controlled and clinical. Nikki stole a glance up at his face and saw it was set and expressionless, his gaze fixed on the wall above the bed.

Soon enough she felt this feeling deep inside her a small stirring, but as soon as it came it was gone. At the same time she heard his breathing change suddenly and felt his body convulse violently inside hers as he reached his climax.

She couldn't have been sure but she thought she heard him cry out her name his voice hoarse and ragged.

He released himself at once and rolled away from her burying his face in his folded arms freeing her.

She moved a little towards the edge of the bed. "May I go now?"

"Why not? Since you have no desire to sleep in my arms and awake to my kisses in the morning."

Nikki moved out of the room quickly and back to her own stripping out of the nightgown she moved to the bathroom and jumped in the shower. Scrubbing her body trying to get the dirty feeling off her, once she felt clean Nikki dried off and covered herself in a pair of boxer shorts and a baggy shirt then climbed in bed and cried herself to sleep, realizing this was what her life would be like from now on.