CHAPTER ONE: Stupid, Muggle trinket!


AUTHORS NOTE: I dare you to try and find purpose or comedy in this fanfiction. See, you can't.
DISCLAIMER:Ah, I don't own Myspace or any of the characters, but I didn't need to tell you that.
It was a usual day at the Death Eaters penthouse apartment in London. Black cloaks lay on their usual hooks, black shoes lay on the black "dark mark edition" welcome mat, and cold laughter rested within all of their black hearts. Voldemort looked up, quite alert. "We're going to take over the world and rid it of it's unplesantries."

"Again, master?" retorted McNair.

"Yes, McNair..again." Voldemort said, with a smirk. "Now, listen up…"

Everyone was alert.

"For most of my reign we have been going after Potter – " murmurs of approval rung throughout the room " but I can't go after him forever. See, I have a theory. If I leave Potter alone, Potter will leave me alone. I shant instigate him, what good has that ever done the lot of us?"

Crabbe willingly agreed, "Not much good, sir."

"Silence!" Voldemort said, with anticipation in his eyes. "I have carefully thought this out and decided in order to gain supreme control of, well, everything I have to eliminate the unworthy… the muggles!"

"Killing the other half of the world?" laughed Snape "Master, please rethink this!"

"No, Severus! This is fool-proof."

An air of disbelief filled the room. "Wormtail, bring out the you-know-what…"

"Yes, at your command"

Wormtail rushed to the closet, pulled out a stand with a rectangular object covered in black satin cloth. He removed the cloth and lifted the top to reveal a screen and what seemed to be a pad with the alphabet and various other symbols on it. "It's a Dell Pentium processing lap top computer; all the latest in Muggle fashion."

"Eh, why do you have it, master?" echoed a voice in the crowd.

"Getting to know the enemy, I suppose."

"Really, Tom, this is absurd. You cannot bringdown mankind with a Dell Laptop."

"You're quite right, Snape. You need a bit more then a Dell. That's why, my friends, I have created a Myspace profile."


Proceed to chapter two, friends.