Title: Rejection Hotline Started It All
Summery: She rejected him and it only intrigued him more. Watch the story unfold. PDLD.
Rating: T... to be safe. Suggestive language and all.
Disclaimer: GG belongs to ASP and DP, and Rejection Hotline belongs to Jeff Goldblatt.
Beta: The best beta in the world! Flynn.
Notes: Read author's note at bottom please.
Part 1: The Pick Up Lines
"I'm an so sick of being hit on at work," Rory Gilmore groaned. "I can't even type at my desk anymore without some guy coming up to me, trying to pick me up."
Rory Gilmore worked at the New York Times as an advice columnist. It wasn't the job she had wanted as a kid, but after filling temporarily after the regular columnist had quit, the boss had seen that she had a knack for it and kept her on. Not that she was complaining, the pay was good and she still got to write her political articles every so often.
With her long wavy coffee brown hair swept back in a French braid, with her bangs falling to one side, she took a drink of her Screwdriver.
Every Friday, she and her friends would get together at a local pub near their apartments and complain about their jobs and the idiot men that surrounded them during the week.
Stephanie Merdock was the editor of the prestigious Cosmopolitan magazine and was very happy with her job. She sat next to Rory with her long blonde curly hair falling in front of her face as she drank her Martini.
Across from them sat Paris Geller, in all her ferocious glory. She was the resident District Attorney who always had the most to complain about, with pig cops and sexist attorneys hounding her all day. Her dirty blonde hair was swept back in a ponytail at the nape of her neck.
"What is it about guys that think the world revolves around them?" Paris asked as she downed one of her shots that were sitting on the tray in front of her.
"What is it about guys that think we'll just fall at their feet at any stupidity that comes out of their mouths?" Steph asked taking a sip of her Cosmo.
"I heard the horrible pick up line the other day," Rory said thinking about the encounter she had with one of the staff editors in the copy room.
"Do tell," Steph said interested.
Rory chuckled as she thought about it before telling her friends. "I was in the copy room when a co-worker came up to me and said with this cocky smile and a wink 'My name is Earl, but you can call me Fred, 'cause I can make your bed rock.'"
The girls howled with laughter at the line.
"That's not the sad part," Rory laughed trying to calm them down.
"What is?" Paris asked.
"His names was Stan," Rory said seriously, causing the girls into another bout of laughter.
"No, no, what about this one," Paris said still laughing. " Your place or mine? Tell you what, I'll flip a coin, heads my place, tails yours."
The girls laughed, causing Steph to chime in with hers.
"This one, 'I think I feel like Richard Gere - I'm standing next to you, pretty woman."
Rory laughed. "Oh, my mom would love that one, it's mockable and has a pop culture reference. But here's another one. 'Girl, you gotta be tired, 'cause you've been running through my head all day long.'"
"Sadly, I've heard that one," Paris laughed. "Here's one," she said sitting up. "It's not my fault I fell in love, you're the one that tripped me."
"No, no," Steph laughed. "Hey, do you live on a chicken farm, 'cause you're real good at raising cocks."
Paris gave a hoot of laughter as Rory put her hand to her mouth to stifle it.
"Or there's 'When god made you, he was only showing off'," Rory told them.
"Then there's the very classic, 'Did it hurt when you fell from heaven'," Steph said taking another drink.
Rory rolled her eyes. "That one is outdated, my mom said my dad used that one."
"Did she fall for it?" Paris asked taking another shot.
Rory laughed. "They're married, aren't they?"
Steph and Paris laughed. As they continued on drinking and laughing, the dirtier the pick up lines got and the louder the laughter.
"The word of the day is legs, let's go back to my place and spread the word," Paris laughed
"I'm going to have sex with you tonight... so you might as well be there." Stephanie added.
"What do you say we go back to my crib and do some math: add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs and multiply," Rory choked out in between laughs.
"Are you a sergeant, because you make my privates stand up." Steph giggled.
"Hey babe, nice legs, when do they open?" Paris said, making her voice deeper, causing the girls to laugh harder
"Let's play house, you be the screen door and I'll bang you all night," Rory put in.
"Oh! Oh! I have one!" Steph said. "I can't make a cherry pop, but I can make a banana cream."
The girls laughed as they downed the rest of their drinks, adding their pick up lines as they came into their heads.
Finn turned his head in amusement as he heard the loud laughter coming from the other side of the bar. Though the bar was crowded and loud, the women's laughter stuck out the most, not as drunk and obnoxious, but he could tell that the women were enjoying themselves. He turned back to his friends, his face still amused.
Finn Rothschild came to this New York pub with his friends every Friday night to unwind form the labors of work and overbearing fathers. He was the heir to the Rothschild hotel chain, though they didn't own many in New York, seeing as Donald Trump had it covered. He now owned a few and it was his job to up keep them - all soberly.
Logan Huntzberger sat across from him, nursing a scotch, the heir to Huntzberger Media. He ran a newspaper, along with some magazines. Though he enjoyed newspaper business and anything that had to do with writing, he disliked his father for pushing him into it, instead of letting him pick it on his own, or giving him options, even though he knew the idea of options was ridiculous for the Huntzberger heir.
Colin McCrea sat between them nursing his whiskey. Colin, being one of the top lawyers in the Big Apple next to his father, had a stressful job. Not only did he deal with assholes all day, but he also had to deal with his clients. He worked in his father's firm as his partner. Though he enjoyed arguing in courtrooms and bartering for deals, he hated the stress.
"What do you think those girls are talking about?" Logan asked as they heard another round of laughter.
"I have no idea, but whatever it is, has got to be hilarious," Colin smirked.
"They seem to be enjoying themselves," Finn said looking back and catching a flash of a brown braid going over a girl's shoulder.
"They're probably old hags who can't get dates and are bashing the male race," Logan said downing the rest of his drink.
"Knowing that at the end of the night they go home alone and only have themselves to find pleasure." Colin said causing Finn to snort in laughter as Colin and Logan clicked glasses in agreement.
Finn watched as one of them stood up and started laughing as he turned back to the guys. "Looked like you pegged them wrong," he pointed over to the table. Logan and Colin looked and saw a brunette and a blonde stand up and laugh as they walked to the bar.
Finn drank the rest of the liquid in his glass as he stood up straightening his coat. "One of those women will not be going home alone tonight," he told them as he walked over to the bar. He leaned against the bar as they two women talked laughingly.
"Oh come on," the blonde said. "He didn't say that."
"I swear," the brunette said, turning to the bartender. "Another round of shots, a Cosmo and a Screwdriver," she ordered.
"You ladies sure can drink," Finn interjected as he ordered himself another Foster's.
"Yes, well, when winding down from the day from hell, you need all the drinks you can handle," the blonde said, causing the brunette to snort.
"My name is Finn and you are..."
"Lola St. James," the blonde replied with a smile, sticking out her hand to shake his, causing the brunette to laugh and thank the bartender for their drinks.
"And you?" Finn asked.
"Lorelai," she replied.
"Do you have a last name, Lorelai?"
"Gilmore," she smiled.
"Well, Lorelai, have you ever tried an Australian kiss? It's like a French kiss... only down under," he smirked.
Finn watched as Lorelai and Lola began to laugh.
"I can't believe we forgot that one," Lola laughed.
"We'll tell Paris," Lorelai laughed. She turned back to Finn and eyed him up and down. "You know, you're sort of cute."
"Only 'sort of', love?"
"Yeah, sort of. I've seen cuter, but I've seen worse," she laughed. She grabbed a cocktail napkin and stuck out her hand. "A guy like you has to have a pen."
"You're in luck," he told her handing her one from the inside of his coat. She laughed as she took it and wrote on the napkin.
"I'm from out of town," she said, "But give me a call sometime and we can definitely get together. Maybe you can show me that Australian kiss... come on, Lola."
Stephanie looked at the number as Rory handed it to Finn and walked away with the tray of drinks. They walked back to their table and sat down, taking their drinks.
"What took you so long?" Paris asked.
"Rory got hit on by a very sexy Australian man," Steph said causing Rory to blush. "Now I didn't get a good look at that number you gave him, but I know it wasn't yours or any of ours. So what was it?"
Rory laughed. "My mom told me about this number that girls and guys alike give out when they're being hit on and don't want to bite. It's called the Rejection Hotline. You give the person the number, they call and they get the very funny message about how they're being rejected, but get the hint. Me and mom memorized it."
"You gave him that number?" Paris asked.
"Yep, too bad I can't see his face when he calls," Rory laughed.
"You've never been so bold." Steph said.
"Shut up, Lola."
"Lola?" Paris asked. "Wow, if all this happens when you guys are getting drinks, I definitely want to go up with Rory next time."
Rory and Steph laughed as they told her what happened up at the bar.
Finn walked back to the table smugly and sat down with his drink.
"So, what's the consensus, Mr. Rothschild?" Logan asked.
Finn slapped down the cocktail napkin with a smirk. "Got her number, didn't I?"
"This is a long distance number," Colin said looking at the area code on the napkin.
"Said she was from out of town," Finn shrugged. "I will definitely be calling her, that's for sure."
"Well, I got to say, Finn," Logan said, "You do have a way with women."
"I've read the player handbook well," Finn laughed as he stuffed the napkin in his pocket.
"Now, if only we could get women."
"She had friends," Finn said. "A Lola, and I think a Paris."
Logan shook his head. "See, this is why we're friends, 'cause you get the women with friends."
Finn laughed as he looked behind him at the table of girls who were laughing. Yep, he was definitely going to call her.
AN: I was looking on my phone the other day and found the Rejection Hotline number. My friend gave it to me to listen to 'cause it's hilarious. So I listened to it the other day and I got to thinking... what if I used it in a story. So here it is. lol. Rejection Hotline does exist. Trust me, lol.
This is going to be a short fic, no more then five or six chapters. Just fluff and all that good stuff lol.
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