Disclaimer: I don't own South Park. I wrote this story just for fun.
Author's Note: Sorry for spelling or grammar mistakes, English isn't my first language.
Of Envy and Hatred
She hated girls. They seemed so shallow to her, their mind constantly occupied with thoughts of handsome guys and the latest fashion, and she detested the fact that even though they acted like complete imbeciles, they allowed themselves to say that boys were shallow and stupid. She hated how they mocked other girls because they were smart, different, not interested in minor details like the difference between "rosy red" and "blood red".
Girls are mean. They are so since the day they leave their mothers' womb into the world. A guy would insult you only if he has company, whilst girls would insult you even if they are alone. Guys don't mean what they say, they do so to impress. Girls mean it, and that's why it hurts more.
That's why she had Stan Marsh as her boyfriend in childhood. She wanted to show them that she was better than them, she needed the close companion of a man. Yet Stan Marsh proved to be quite the wuss when he was next to her, constantly throwing up on her when she tried to take their relationship to the next level. As time passed he barely talked to her, preferring to spend his free time with his friends, especially with Kyle Broflovski.
And she hated him for that. She hated both of them.
So she broke up with him and started dating Token soon after in order to make him jealous. She thought that her plan was working when Stan joined the Goths, she was gloating when Kyle's efforts to bring him up again failed, but then one day he came to school, dressed like any other boy his age should, and told her she was a bitch.
Her plan was a complete failure.
Since there was no need for Token anymore, she dumped him, much to his dismay. She dated countless of guys after him, but stopped doing so when she came to the conclusion that Stan would never be jealous, plus discovering that she was now very popular among the females in her school.
Of course there were times he was jealous. She just didn't know about them.
"Ohmygodohmygod!" one blond girl said to her friend as she passed by them in the hall of her high-school. "Have you seen Stan and Kyle today!"
He brown-haired girlfriend squealed, causing Wendy Testaburger to frown. "Yeah! They're so cute together!"
She wanted to throw up…
"One time," a new girl said as she joined the conversation, "I saw them holding hands in the yard!"
"Pfft," a tall girl huffed, crossing her arms over her chest and eyeing the group of girls mockingly. "You think that's something?" she asked, smiling evilly. "I saw them kissing once. Actually, more than once!"
Wendy heard the group of girls squeal and demand for details, but managed to get away before the tall girl provided them.
It wasn't gays that she despised. It was Stan and Kyle. Well, not Stan and Kyle… just Kyle. That Jewish slut… (not that she had problems with those group of people either, mind you!)
Those girls thought they've seen it all. Well, they didn't know what Wendy Tesaburger saw. They wished they would have, but Wendy wished she didn't.
She first noticed the change during Kyle's thirteenth birthday, also known as: Bar Mitzvah.
After Kyle finished singing sacred words in a voice that made her annoyed and her ex all dreamy and distant, all of the occupants of the synagogue began throwing candies at him. Eric Cartman (after failing to burn down the building and attending the ceremony only because his mother made him) wrapped little rocks in colorful paper and joined the party. A few of them hit Kyle's head, causing him to trip and fall from the small stage. Stan was immediately at his side. He was never at her side so fast…
Later that day, she went looking for him after he disappeared. She found him alright. She found him with Kyle behind the synagogue. They were holding hands. Stan's one hand was behind Kyle's neck as he gave him soft pecks on the forehead and quick kisses on the lips, causing the receiving side to blush beet red.
She was boiling with rage, feeling a sudden urge to join Cartman in his battle against the Jewish community (namely Kyle), but instead she turned around and left the place.
Fucking Stan… if she only dared being less than an inch away from him, he would throw up. Was she the only one who saw the injustice in that situation?
It only got worse after that incident.
Once you notice something, you begin to notice it everywhere. Such was the case with Stan and Kyle. She always found them, even when they tried to hide. She saw them hugging behind the bleachers, she saw them making out in the yard after school, she saw them holding hands during the cultural events they were made to take part in… she saw them everywhere, and it got on her nerves.
It wouldn't have bothered her so much if it weren't for Stan. Sure, the fact that he was half of the "Stan and Kyle trend" was bothering her enough, but there was also this minor fact that he thought of her as his best friend (since Kyle seemed to evacuate this spot). It was entirely her fault, really. In her numerous, futile attempts to get him back, he misinterpreted her moves to hit on him, making him believe that she wanted him as a close friend. And so, she found herself sitting next to the happy couple during boring-ass movies and even more boring-ass fairs. Kyle was smart, he knew what her true goal is, and was never that happy around her and barely talked, causing Stan to worry and fuss over him ("why won't you hold my hand?"). She couldn't take it any longer, and began making excuses as to why she couldn't join them. Stan was mad at her, saying that she didn't love him anymore because he was gay or some stupid reason like that. He didn't talk with her for nearly six months, until one day he seemed to forget about it. He didn't ask her to come with him and his dear boyfriend anymore, and she was thankful for him for that.
She was the first person (other than Kyle) that Stan came out to, and so she had to listen to him complaining about the troubles he had in their relationship. It was fine more or less during their junior high years, but when they entered high school new problems were bothering him and taking peaceful sleep away from him: sex problems.
She tried telling him it didn't interest her, she tried convince him that she was the wrong person to ask, but it didn't work, and so she found herself listening to Stan Marsh whine about how Kyle just wouldn't let off with his craving "for more" and moving to the "next level".
"He simply refuses to understand that I'm not ready for it yet!" he used to say sadly, meaning that Kyle really wanted to take his ass, but Stan didn't want to give it. The mental image alone made her feel sick. Apparently Stan was happy enough just with the hand and blow jobs they were giving each other (oh, the nights she stayed awake during after he told her in details about those experiences…), but Kyle wasn't.
"Why won't you tell him, then?" she asked, frowning.
"I'm trying, but he won't understand!" Stan resumed whining in her ears. "He even tried taking me by force!"
Too much information!
"Well, dump him then," she said, and he looked at her, shocked, and then considered this option.
The next day she never saw them together, and whenever they caught the other looking their way, they turned their heads and snobbishly huffed. She couldn't be happier.
It continued this way for a few days, and after the anger from their fight dissolved, she noticed how sad and lonely Stan looked. He barely talked to her, and even though it had it's bright side, she couldn't help but feel somewhat lonely herself.
So she decided to help him mend his relationship with Kyle (hey, she wasn't a total bitch. At least not in her eyes). She came to Stan's house one day, and his mother told her he was at Kyle's.
As much as she didn't want to, she found herself in Kyle's living room. Nobody answered when she knocked, and the door was open, so she let herself in. She should have known something was wrong then. She should have turned away when she went upstairs and heard quiet moans from one of the rooms. Curiosity killed the cat, but she felt like Kenny in his early years when she opened the door (which was already opened a crack) and saw Kyle riding Stan like a horse, kissing his neck and emitting moans from his gleeful partner.
She wanted to scream, she wanted to run, but like a terrible accident; she couldn't tear her eyes away from the horrifying yet strangely hot sexual activity. She gulped, gripping the wooden door in a death grip, and watched as their moans grew louder until the moment of climax, when Kyle kissed Stan deeply, his body spasming.
She stood there, stunned, for a couple more minutes before closing the door quietly behind her and leaving to the pair whispering quiet "I love you"s.
Apparently, they didn't need her help in rekindling their flame of love. It was probably Kyle's fault, seeing that he was on top and all…
Stan met with her the following day. "So yesterday," he said, fidgeting and blushing, "I went to Kyle's house to apologize. He's so nice, he didn't blame me and apologized for being so pushy… his parents weren't home and we-"
"Nah uh!" She said, holding her palm in front of his face and cutting him off in mid-sentence. "I really don't need to hear what happened next!" It's better if he didn't know that she knew what happened next…
"But Wendy," he tried to argue, holding her shoulders. "I thought you were my best friend! It's essential for you to know!"
"Please!" she cried, pushing his arms away. "Save me this elaboration!"
He seemed dejected, but let it go, deciding that the you-don't-love-me-and-I'm-oh-so-poor-and-lonely look he gave her for the rest of the day will make her cave-in, and it did.
Hey, she loved the guy. She couldn't let him be mad at her forever.
So she had to listen to his tales of wonderful and lustful intimate activity. Luckily, they didn't get to the stage of slide-shows yet. Though even if they did, it's not like he'd show her something she didn't already see, unfortunately.
"Say," she asked him while he told her about the moments just before his orgasm. "Isn't Kyle… I don't know, mad that you tell me all this things?"
He blinked stupidly at her. "Well, duh. Why do you think we fought?"
"Wasn't it because he kept demanding you for sex?"
He blushed. "Well, partly, yeah. But the main reason we fought was because I told him that you advised me to dump him."
She couldn't believe he talked with Kyle about her, especially about that matter!
"-So he said that I should stop talking to you about every problem we have, and that I should go to him instead. I told him that maybe he can do without someone, who isn't me, to tell his troubles to, but I can't."
She didn't know how to feel. She was glad that Stan confided in her and trusted her, but she wanted him to see her more than his best friend. It was something she was almost positive that Kyle felt earlier in his life.
"Anyway," he continued, and she hoped that he wasn't intending on continuing his description of sexual escapade. He told her something worse: "it's thanks to you that Kyle and I are together again and happier than before. You're a great friend, Wendy, you know that?" he patted her back like she was his buddy and left, going to seek Kyle so they could make out in the bathroom, she guessed.
She sighed heavily, feeling down. A new presence was suddenly next to her, and she looked up to see her enemy standing above her: Kyle Broflovski.
Kyle was tall, his gaze cold and mysterious. She never saw him as good looking and told herself that other girls found him attractive because he was gay. She always avoided him when she could, but now she felt like there was no way out.
"What do you want?" she asked coldly, turning her head away.
He sat next to her and didn't reply. They stayed like that for what seemed to her like forever until he spoke. "Stan may see you as his best friend," he said, "but I know better. I know that you want him."
She gritted her teeth and turned her head towards him, fuming. "If you dare threatening me, I'm telling Stan and joining forces with Cartman!"
She was surprised to see him smile in response, causing her to feel even angrier. He patted her shoulder just like Stan had and stood up. "I'm not like you, Wendy. Let me just tell you this: Stan will never be yours. He's oblivious and gay. You better give up before you'll get hurt." Then he left, leaving her to fume by herself.
"As much as I hate saying this, he's right, you know," Eric Cartman told her when she offered to join forces with him against the "stupid Jew".
"And I'm only telling you this because I hate seeing people suffer when I'm not the one who caused it."
"What do you mean?" she asked.
"Well, Stan's obviously gay. It's too bad he only believed me when he started dating Kyle a few years ago; I've been saying it for years! Anyway, as you know, since he's such a faggy kid, he can't return your feelings. It'd be a total waste of time for you to try and get him away from the faggy Jew."
She gazed curiously at him. "Why are you helping me?" she asked.
"I told you," he replied. "I hate seeing people suffer when it's not because of something I did. Then I'm the one, who's suffering."
Bebe and Heidi told her the same thing. Kenny did, too, after offering to be her boyfriend instead. Even Butters did, damn it!
She was desperate. Was there really no hope for her?
Seeing Stan and Kyle together the following days seemed to hurt her more than it did in the past. She didn't know if perhaps she should share her thoughts with Stan like he managed to do for the past few years. She knew that if she'd do that, she may ruin what they already have.
Luckily for her, Stan brought up the topic first. He called her to the side after lunch break and confronted her about the situation with Kyle.
"I can't help but get the feeling that you don't like him," he said and she chose to remain silent. "Is it true, then? What did he do to you?"
She tried to hold the words back, she really did, but eventually she found herself shouting: "He was born, that's what!"
Stan was shocked, and his eyes told her that he thought she betrayed him. She wasn't surprised. "How can you say that?" he asked in a whisper, choking on his words. "How can you say that about the one I love most?"
"He took you away from me!" she finally confessed as tears sprang to her eyes. Silent sobs wrecked her body, she couldn't believe she finally said that. Apparently, Stan couldn't believe it, either.
"What?" he whispered, stunned.
"You heard me!" she cried. "He took you away from me!" she took his hand in hers and looked into his eyes. "I love you, Stanley Marsh! I always have!" There. She finally said all there was to say.
He averted his gaze from her and her heart fell. He took the nail of his thumb in his mouth and chewed it gently, something he used to do whenever he was nervous. "I- I don't really know what to tell you, Wendy," he finally spoke, still not looking at her. "You know I love you, but only as a friend. My heart, as you should know, belongs to another." She knew that this is what he would say, and yet she couldn't stop her tears from running down her cheeks. Then he smiled. "I'm glad you told me how you feel, though," he said. "I mean, I spilled my heart in front of you for years, but you never told me how you feel. You'll find yourself a fine man, Wendy, but it's not me." He gave her a hug, trying to console her, and kissed her cheek. How ironic it was that their first kiss occurred when he rejected her.
She pushed him away and wiped her tears. She was too proud to let him comfort her. "Thanks, Stan. I think I'll be able to get over it now." Then she walked away, ignoring his pleas for her to come back.
Things were awkward between them after that, at least on her side. Kyle looked like he was gloating, but then again, it could have been her imagining things. Cartman gave her the I-told-you-so look, and Kenny never let off in his pleas for her to marry him instead of Stan.
She'd get over him. She knew she wouldn't unless she'd confess her feelings. She could see Stan more as a friend than her boyfriend now, and didn't run like the wind whenever females around her told tales of wonderful gayness.
Now that Stan wasn't a target anymore, she found out that Kyle was a pretty nice guy and had to turn Cartman down when he asked her to join him in plans to bring him and his people down. Cartman seemed to hate her more than before then.
"Are we cool now?" Stan asked her a few weeks after her confession.
She patted his back like he did to her so many times before. "As cool as we can get," she answered with a smile.
He smiled widely in response and gave her a hug. "You're a great friend, Wendy. Never forget that you're very important to me." Then he ran off, found Kyle and dragged him off somewhere.
She still felt somewhat sad whenever she watched them, but she was Glad that Stan was happy. All she could do now was babysit them from afar and make sure to never, ever, walk in on them again. The mental image from Stan's stories was enough.
Besides, Stan and Kyle were indeed kind of cute together, and Stan's stories didn't make her nauseated anymore. Not that she'd ever admit that to anyone but herself.
"Kyle cried a bit at lunch today!" a girl said. "And Stan was sooo cute, he wiped the tears away and gave him a kiss!" Wendy smiled uneasily. "Don't you think he's great, Wendy? Did Stan tell you why he cried? You're his best friend!"
Wendy shifted in her sit. "Well…" she said slowly, earning hopeful looks from a group of females around her. "I don't know, haven't talked with him yet."
The group of girls groaned in disappointment, and she giggled. She did talk with Stan, actually. Kyle cried because he got the feeling that Stan loved her more. Stan had to convince him it wasn't so (which wasn't hard, he told her. A kiss always made him feel much better, not to mention what he had planned for tonight. She stopped him then). Now it was her turn to gloat.
Hey, she may have got over him, but it's nice to have someone jealous of you from a time to time, right? Especially if that certain someone is your ex's boyfriend.
Author's Note: Whoa, came out longer that I expected.