Dust and Tears

Darkkinkachu: I just wanted to do a little fallow-up to my 'Our Hearts Pump Dust' story…I don't know why, I just wanted to, ok? And I'm thinking of making 'Scarred Back, Scarred Heart' a two-shot. Read it and tell me what you think.

Lawyer Lemur: Darkkinkachu does not own Shaman King. That song poem thing, however, was created by Darkkinkachu. So don't steal it.


Did you really think

You could live off dust and tears?

Did you really think

You could hide from all your fears?

Anna Kyoyama slid he door open ever so slightly. It was past midnight and, unless Ren had gone down to steal some milk, everyone was sound asleep. Faintly, she could hear SoulBob still playing from Yoh's room. She paused for a moment, a twinge of guilt biting through her heart. What if he knew? What would he say?

And you thought you could go on.

But you'll always know it's wrong.

So cry your bitter tears

All that's left is dust and fears.

With the stealth and silence of a shadow, the blond girl slipped down the stairs and around the corner. There she stopped and stared at the door in front of her. His door. Slowly she opened it and carefully stepped inside. He wasn't asleep and she knew it. He either slept sprawled out, mouth open, snoring slightly or curled up tight as if trying to protect himself from the world. No, he was lying on his back, hands behind his head, as if he had been waiting for. And he probably had been.

You let him kiss away the pain

Cause no one else would.

Let his love fall like rain

And drench you as it should.

He turned his head and gave her a sad smile. She gave him a pleading look, a look she had never giving to any one but him. He looked back at her and, for a moment, she feared he would reject her. But then he shifted to the side and welcomed her to lay with him, as he always did.

So now he lays you down to sleep

And you know this secret's deep

Does it scare you, as it should?

He holds you now cause no one would

Anna slipped in next to him, nuzzling her face into the blue-haired Shamans chest and taking in his scent. She loved his smell. Thick and comforting, it was like a spring day after a down pour. She felt and arm snake around her tiny waist and pull her closer. She sighed slightly, letting her head rest on his chest and listening to the gentle thumping of his heart.

Oh, do you feel it now?

Your heart pumped dust.

Ah you feel it now

This feeling beyond lust.

They lay like that for a long time, simply listening to each others hearts beating in sync. Then the Auni boy shifted aging, rolling on to his side and looking down into the face of the girl he loved, "Anna?" he whispered. She didn't look up but he knew she wasn't sleeping, "Anna please look at me…it been almost three months now-" he started but was cut off.

"Please Horohoro…I…don't want to talk about it…" she murmured. She knew exactly what he wanted to talk about. He would say that this was wrong and Yoh was his friend and that she shouldn't be going behind his back. But how could she not? Yoh had never once looked at her the way Horohoro did. He never complimented her on how nice she looked or told her she was beautiful. He was afraid of her. She had meant it to be that way, to see if he loved her enough to see beyond the mask she wore.

Just one night, you tell yourself

Put your mask up on the self

Let him see, if you must

But you'll always be just tears and dust

Horohoro was the only one who ever bothered to look harder through the minute cracks in her mask. He was the only one who joked and played with her even though he knew he would get hit. She had thought she loved Yoh but now she realized she had been blind. Blinded by the arranged marriage and the feelings she was told to have. Blinded by the way she had been raised; cold, unfeeling, like a stone in the winter. She shivered at theses thoughts and felt Horohoro's muscles instantly contract with concern. He cared that much about her. Anna felt hot, bitter tears welling up in her eyes. The one person she truly loved loved her back…and yet they could never be together.

Hold on tight

Here comes the pain.

You have to fight

Or go insane.

Anna fought for a moment. She didn't want to cry in front of him. She wanted to be strong, for his sake at least. But she just couldn't. He was different. He wouldn't gawk at her and make wisecracks about Ice Queens being able to cry. He would awkwardly try to comfort her with hallow words and uncaring touches. He just pulled her closer and held her tight. After a long silence, filled only with Anna's sobbing and Horohoro's gentle soothing murmurings, the crying begin to subside. Slowly she looked up into his face and he kissed her tears away.

Does it hurt?

This void so vast?

Does it hurt?

That this love can't last?

"Ren caught me again…" Anna whispered with the tiniest ghost of a smile, "A few nights ago when I came down to see you…"

Horohoro gave a soft bitter laugh, "That pointy haired freak and his midnight milk raids…"

"He's really suspicious, you know…" she said, turning over so that her back was to his front, "I don't think he knows what's going on but he knows something is…"

"Ren's just too damn curios…he'll find out sooner of later. I guess we'll have to bump him off, ne?" the blue haired shaman joked, poking her in the ribs. His efforts were rewarded by, in his mind, the most wonderful sound in the world. Anna's soft bubbling giggle. Horohoro grinned and pulled her close, "at least no one else seems to have noticed…"

"Why would they?" Anna said quietly, but he still caught it.

No one cared for you

Then out of the blue

His grin melted your heart

Dance faster, your falling apart.

Horohoro frowned and propped himself up slightly then gave Anna a careful nudge to make her look at him. He gazed down at her with liquid crystal eyes and said in a soft but firm voice, "Don't say that, Anna…don't you ever say that. You know they care about you." She just looked up at him with those deep dark eyes, "you know I care about you…You're so beautiful Anna…" he whispered leaning down and giving her a soft kiss on the lips. She kissed him back fighting off a fresh wave of tears. When he pulled back she went with him, not wanting it to end. She felt his lips grin against hers as he stroked the side of her face and broke the kiss, "go to sleep Anna…" he whispered, returning to their original position, "Things will seem better in the morning…I promise."

Go ahead and sleep

Dreams keep us alive

Because in real life

You'll never reach for what you strive

Anna felt her love rest his chin on the top of her head and pull her close again. She didn't want the morning to come…morning meant suspicious looks from Ren. Morning meant facing Yoh and acting like nothing was wrong. Morning meant putting on the mask again and lying to the world. Morning meant another miserable day in her miserable existence…but morning hadn't come yet. The cruel sun hadn't risen up to rip her from he lovers arms. No, it was still night. Cool sweet night that didn't judge her and let he be with the only one she had ever truly loved.

"I love you, Horohoro…" She whispered closing her eyes.

"I love you too, Anna…" came the groggy reply.

And now you mask is cracked

And all the things you lacked

Are out in the open for him to see.

Cause the world wont let you be.

All you'll ever be

Is dust and tears.

Darkkinkachu: uhm…I really didn't mean for this to be so depressing…cough…I don't know what to say…other than please review I guess…I think I'll go cry now . ya betta give me reviews to dry my eyes with!