Imma Kiwi Bird: New chapter, after a very long wait. I have been... almost MURDERED by middle school. Yeah. I've been freaked out really bad; some guy is stalking me. And. It's, like... changed my speech pattern alot. He got me saying 'un' when I'm speechless. Itss00perscary. So yeah. xD The update schedule for the fics have been changed as well. Might as well check those.

One:

You and Me and the Devil Makes Three and Faulty Time Turner will not be updated separately. The two will both be finished together and uploaded together. So, I won't have to keep the fans of individual fanfics waiting. THIS CHAPTER AND THE NEXT CHAPTER FOR FTT DO NOT COUNT. I want to just get these two out by the end of the month. Simple as that.

Two:

I will be slowly redoing the first five or so chapters of this story. And, when I do one, I'll post a notice at the top of the newer chapter so you can go reread it if you please. I would suggest doing so; the chapters will be much better and richer in quality. Or, something nice like that.

Three:

For those that bother to care (boy, do I feel unloved), I may be bringing Family of Disasters back soon. It will be there for the sheer enjoyment of others. And lastly, it would be something I put up when I have a minor case of writer's block for the other stories. Yeah. I know. Lame excuse. Get off my back.

Now, without further ado, the newest installment.

PS - Jackass is, like... one of the funniest shows there is. xD

PPS - The book on pirates and time traveling in this chapter is a reference to my other fairly popular story, Faulty Time Turner. x3

Disclaimer: I don't own the HP or Naruto characters. Kishimoto Misashi and JK Rowling do.

Key for Text: "Words." This is in Japanese.

"Words." This is normal speaking.

"Words." This is thinking.


You and Me and the Devil Makes Three

Chapter 9: Can't Find a Book?

Honestly; Hermione wrote on the paper; rather quickly, as if she were infuriated. She's like the woman version of Lockheart. She passed the paper to her left, and Ron looked at it. For a few moments he was silent, staring at the note paper. What to reply...?

Ron: Are we forgetting that you fell for the old bloke too?

Pass.

Hermione: Shut it, Ronald. I mean, all the men are following her around like lost, helpless puppies. Ron, I found someone following her to the showers during lunch; on my way to the library.

Pass.

Ron: Oh, yeah... wasn't it one of them Slytherins? But, you must admit. She is beautiful. I quote my brothers, alright?

Pass. Hermione read it, then turned her head sharply to send a nasty glare at Ronald. He shrugged, looking nervous. Hermione growled lowly, crumpled up the parchment, and shoved it into her robes. The perverted, thoughtless, despicable...

Hermione let a sigh pass through her lips. Double Transfiguration with the Ravenclaws as their last subject of the day was very nice, actually. She knew, that from now on, she would look forward to this subject time (on Tuesday. Note taken.).

But, McGonagall was currently lecturing them on what the course expectations were, what they would be doing, and so on. Also, they got at least thirty-minutes worth of information on the OWLs they would all be taking that year. Hermione, of course, was looking forward to the tests; she was sure she would pass in all her subjects. She needed to start making her, Ron, and Harry's study schedules soon...

Snapping back into reality as McGonagall allowed them to leave ten minutes early, Hermione gathered her books together and shoved them into her bag. Pushing from the wooden desk, she picked up her bag and waited for Ron. He was saying something to Harry, yet she didn't bother to listen in. All the girl had to do was glare and ask what or who they were talking about, and BAM: there is it.

As soon as her friends finished their short conversation, the three quickly left the room and headed for the Gryffindor common room. As they headed down the hall, Hermione picked up four pairs of footsteps instead of three. Thinking it was simply Draco Malfoy following them to 'tease' them, she turned around sharply; mouth open to curse him down back to the dungeons. Her mouth instantly shut as she flinched at the sight. Ron and Harry to turned around as well to see what was holding Hermione.

In the middle of the hallway was Rock Lee (in all his spandex glory). Apparently, he was still the one who had to guard Harry.

Hermione turned and started heading towards the common room rather quickly, leaving Ron and Harry behind. "Lee, do ya think Harry could have some time alone?" Ron asked breathlessly, sighing and hanging his head down. Lee grinned, his teeth giving off a blinding light. Hell; Harry had to take off his glasses and rub his eyes before Lee replied.

"No!"

Nothing else to ask, so the two boys heading towards the common room as well. Lee jumped after them, making odd noises as he kicked and punched at the air while following.

"Honestly, Harry. I think he's worse than spiders."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

After Hermione had successfully dragged Ronald and Harry into the Hogwarts library, she instantly went searching for a new book; one she had never read nor heard of. Or, better yet, a new book she had heard of and wanted to read desperately. As she scanned the shelves, a pointed finger going over the bindings of books, Hermione scowled. She, for some reason, could not find a book she hadn't read. Letting out a breath of frustration, she stepped back and folding her arms.

"Shoot," The Gryffindor girl cursed under her breath, huffing as she turned and started stomping back towards the table where Harry and Ronald were reading some books on Quidditch; Lee hovering over Harry eerily. How could he even stand that? Shaking her head, Hermione pulled a chair from the table and plopped down into it. Ron looked at her lazily, before his eyes widened.

"Her-Hermione!"

"What, Ronald?"

"You... you have no book!" Hermione sighed at his exaggeration and looked at Harry so she could spark a conversation. Her mouth shut quickly when she noticed he was looking up from his Quidditch book, mouth agape as well.

"Honestly! You two think books are my life!" Her inner self was shouting curses towards her for being stupid; books pretty much were her life. Oh; and studying. Could not forget studying. Ron and Harry seemed to think along the same lines as they stared at her unbelievingly. Hermione scowled and leaned back in her chair, folding her arms.

She mumbled something, and Harry and Ron leant towards her. They hadn't heard.

"What?" The both asked together.

"I said: 'No. New. Books.'" Hermione repeated, only louder so Ron and Harry could hear. The two nodded, going back to their normal positions in their chairs. Hermione turned her head to look out the window; she was glad they had gotten this table. It was near a very large window that overlooked most of the grounds; Hagrid's hut, the Quidditch field, the Greenhouses, the Forbidden Forest... Hermione let out a small, content sigh. The Hogwarts grounds was so beautiful...

Hermione turned slightly so she could look at Rock Lee through the corner of her eye. The teen was utterly... well, scary. Disturbing, menacing to the eye... However you would like to put it. And yet, Hermione couldn't help but feel sorry for him. Why?

Because noone willingly gets into a green spandex body suit.

... Did they?

Hermione shook her head at the thought and stood once more. There just had to be a book in the library she hadn't read. Excusing herself (and being ignored by Ron and Harry), she headed back towards the back wall of the library. She went there... every so often; just because she had finished every book back there in her first year. That section was where she had found the book that mentioned Nicolas Flamel, come to think of it.

So... wouldn't that be the perfect place for a new book to be set upon a shelf, collecting dust, where Hermione Granger would never lay eyes on it? Yes. It would. So, that was why she was heading there.

The moment she turned into the last row to the left, her eyes found the binding of a book she had never read. Lightening up, Hermione reached for the book and pulled it from the shelf.

It was an old, grayish-colored book with black lining. Letting her hand go over the binding and cover, she pushed the dust off so she could read what the book was called.

The binding said: 'Time and the Caribbean'. Hermione smiled slightly, tilting her head at the strange book title. And yet, it seemed interesting enough. Glancing at the cover, she seen the faded image of what she supposed was a pirate ship with black sails; but the sails were tattered and worn. And yet, an invisible wind blew through them, pushing it along the water that the picture showed. Shrugging at the irrationality of it, Hermione opened the book to the title page.

Time and the Caribbean

By: H.G, H. P., and R. W.

Published by the-

Hermione instantly stopped reading the title page, concentrating on the three authors initials. Unscramble them, and you got:

By: Hermione Granger, Harry Potter, and Ronald Weasley

But, of course, that was impossible. She, Harry, and Ron were only in their fifth year. And while they had done many things others hadn't, publishing a book titled 'Time and the Caribbean' was not one of them. Letting out a small chuckle at the stupid thought that they had actually wrote this book, Hermione passed it off as a coincidence. She quickly pulled out of the row and made a beeline for their librarian, Madam Pince.