Okaayyy. I blame this sudden inspiration of a Kisame x Sakura fic on a half cloudy, half blackish-blue, rainy day. In July. During a drought.

Because both the pairing and the weather mean something..

And NO, it ain't "kissing in the rain", neither.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, or Vogue. But if I did.. oh the articles I would write!


Aw, shit.

For lack of better words..oh, who was she kidding? Those words were perfect for her current situation. And screw anyone who could come up with better, a familiar inner voice of her's growled. She heartily agreed while dodging another forceful blow from the freakish looking man infront of her.

He grinned widely, showing the many teeth she was sure he might devour her with.


Okay Sakura, get in the game already, ignore the teeth! Focus on..other parts.

She ignored that last thought by jumping inbetween the surrounding trees, er..what was left of them. She heard the most charming of laughs behind her, gaining speed too, she noticed.

"You can run, little kunoichi, but you can't escape me!" the 'fish-man' as she now dubbed him, yelled at her.

Isn't it supposed to be "hide"? You can run, but you can't hide? Where these ridiculous thought came from, she hadn't a clue, but at a time like this, being chased by a member of Akatsuki, no less, you'd think she would have better things to fret over. Like him, perhaps. Today was just not her day. And it wasn't even that time of the month, either! She really wished she hadn't lost sight of the others. They better be okay, she thought, Because I'm going to kick their asses later.

She realised too late that she had been thinking too hard again, and had no time to react to the sharp sting to her back, diagonally, and deep, she noted. With an uncharastic grunt, she landed with little grace on the ground below. She tried healing the gash, but found she couldn't. Damnit. That sword of his did this. The fish-man skid up to her a moment later, still wearing the wide grin that she just wanted to remove, forget a slap, with a hot iron bar. She tried to move, but found that mr. fish-shark-bastard, had his very heavy, not soft in the slightest, ass on her back.

The hell! He's sitting on me! "Ungh! Get the HELL off me, you bastard!"

His grin got even wider at that. "Seems I've caught myself a little spitfire."

"Yeah, well this little spitfire is going to punch your ugly face in." she muttered more to herself, but alas, he still heard it.

"I'd like to see you try, kunoichi." that grin of his was completly perverse now. shitshitshit-


Thunder. Wonderful. And he had jumped a little at the sudden noise, she probably would have too, had heavy Kisame not been on her, but either way, it was he who jumped, and he who landed on her already aching back again. She sighed. This was totally not her day at all..

First, she gets this horrible recovery mission of some son of some lord of some village that she's never even heard of, Second, they find the son of some lord of some village, he's dead and rotting even more so since it's humid weather, Thirdly, they find out who actually killed the spoiled runt, because of money or loans or something or other. Then all hell breaks loose, and here she is. Lieing face-down on the hard earth with an Akatsuki member, who just happens to be very, very heavy, on her back. And it's about to start raining. Joy..

And he's laughing again..huh. Well, that tears it.

"Get off me, you fucking gay shark." she spat at him, with that animalistic gleam in her eye that only women can get.

He stopped laughing and stared at her. "Gay?" he asked disbelieving what she'd said. The look on his face made her want to laugh and cry at the childish look he had just given her. Almost like she told him he was really pink, instead of that nice shade of blue he was, and that he'd been fooled all his life.

It was a cute look, really.

But good things don't last long, as he soon half-glared at her. "What makes you think I'm gay, wench?" It looked like he was trying to not seem interested? Ah, well. She'd tell him either way..

"Well first off, you're wearing nail polish." she moved a bit so she was on more of her side, than back. Still looking up at him, "Interesting shade, too."

He turned a shade of purple..was he blushing? She couldn't tell, did purple mean red against blue? Probably. "A-all Akatsuki wear nail polish!" He tried defending his manhood but..

"Most men don't wear rings either." He turned even more purple. Jeez, if he isn't blushing then I've totally failed as a medic.. She grinned at him, knowing that taking his current mind off of eating her legs off or something equally horrible was the right way to go. It seemed to be working anyway..

"Each member has a different ring..." Trying to explain and failing miserably, Kisame could only watch her start to laugh at him now. Oh, this was too good. Big bad Akatsuki bastard reduced to a blushing (she thought?), stuttering, fool. I mean, who wouldn't laugh at a purple shark? That just happens to look more and more like a little boy right now.

Yeah, get that into your head.

"L-let me guess, ha..each member is assigned an issue of Vogue too, right? Ha!" Tears were starting to blur her vision as she leaned her head on her hand and watched his reaction.

That was the last straw. Sakura had crossed the line at that. He growled and stood quickly, when he took her by surprise and yanked her upwards by the arm. "Ouch! Hey, I was just-" but she couldn't finish. Kisame had put his very large, she noted, hands on her slim little waist, and brought his mouth down ontop of hers. He pretty much kissed the life out of her, seeing as she stayed there motionless, like a doll, or puppet. She could smell his hair, which smelled really good right now. Not like chum.. she mused. It started to drizzle a bit. More thunder. But no lighting? Hmm..

He broke it off to breathe, and look up at the coal colored sky. She panted a bit, and tried to slow her heart rate. It didn't help all that much.

He glanced back at her, and gave an arrogant smirk showing those teeth. "Still think I'm gay, little kunoichi?" he began rubbing circles on her waist with his large hands. Sakura looked up, wide green eyes even wider, "N-no..I don't.." Can't even finish a damn sentence. His ego was through the roof now. He leaned down close to her face again. She swallowed, nervous about what he'd do next. He stared with those dark eyes of his, and smirked again.


And he disappeared.

Sakura stood shell-shocked, as it continued to drizzle. Vaguely, in the back of her mind, she realised how vunerable she was right now, but it didn't matter.

Kisame had proved his point about his orientation, and Sakura just wished he'd prove it again.

Yay! Love me now. And don't EVEN leave a review saying that Kisame is gross and ugly and all that jazz, because I'll certainly tear you all a new one. K.

Now..press the pretty lavender button down there, and spill your guts. Oh, and if you're going to call me an "asshole", then please, call me it in English. Because I don't speak Japanese all that well, and you, most likely, just googled the word yourself without knowing a lick of Japanese, and would somehow like to prove your worth. So please. Refrain from being ridiculous.

Aaannd! If you happened to like this story, which I know you did because duh, it's totally awesome, then stay tuned for my upcoming one.

Deidara x Sakura.


Kabuto x Sakura.

I'll eventually do both, at some time or another, but hey. Just leave a review of what you want to see happen..and BAM! I'll shoot you! No, not really. I haven't a gun. :(! Just vote. Or whatever it is you young authors call it.