Description: This is Sam and Valerie's thoughts on Danny. I know. crack-fic. But, oh well I was board and wanted to use Rent, I've never seen it done before. Please no flaming this is my first DP songfic so only constructive criticism if you don't like it. Thanks.

Dedication: To CE Hobbit, one of the top DXS shippers and anyone that knows the original and origin of this song

Disclaimer: Originally it was "Tango Maureen" from RENT. I OWN NEITHER Rent, "…Maureen" or DP

A/N: Sam's thoughts are separated by Bold Italics. When both speak/sing it is only underlined.

The Tango Danny



I told him not to call you

That's Danny. But can I help since I'm here?

I've hired Tucker

Great! So, see you Monday.

Wait! He's three hours late

The samples won't delay but the cable---

There's another way. Say something--anything

Test--one, two, three…

Anything but that

This is weird

It's weird

Very weird

Bloody weird

I'm so mad that I don't know what to do. Fighting with microphones, board to by bones, and to top it all off I'M WITH YOU!

Feel like going insane? Got a fire in your brain? And your thinking of drinking gasoline?

As a matter of fact

Sammy, I know this act. It's called "the Tango Danny"

The Tango Danny. It's a dark, dizzy

Merry-go-Round. As he keeps you dangling

Your wrong

Your heart he's mangling

It's deferent with me!

And you toss and you turn 'cause his warm eyes can burn. You earn and you churn and rebound

I think I know what you mean

The tango Danny

Has he ever pouted his lips and called you 'pookie'


Have you ever doubted a look or two?

This is spooky. Did you swoon when he walked through the door?

Every time. So be cautious

Did he moon over other boys?

More than moon--

I'm getting nervous. He cheated?

He kind of cheated.

Danny cheated?

Flippin' cheated

I'm defeated. I should give up right now

Look on the bright side, with all of your might

I'd fall for him still anyhow

When you're dancing his dance, you don't stand a chance. His grip on Romance makes you fall

So you "think might as well"

"Dance a Tango to Hell"

"At least I'll have tangoed at all"

The tango Danny!

Gotta dance 'till your 'Phantom' is through. You pretend to believe him--'cause in the end----you can't leave him. But the end will come, still you have to play dumb. 'til your glum and you bum and turn blue

Why do we love when he's hiding

And he can be foreboding

Try that mike.

My Danny!



You know, I feel fine now!

I feel lousy.