Authors note: the typical marriage law rules apply. I just didn't feel like explaining them. Ron does hold a bit of a grudge with Oliver but it's nothing serious. The war is over and Hermione's parents have died.

Summary: OXH one shot! Everyone assumed she would become Mrs. Ronald Bilious Weasley. She was sick of it all. She would have none of it and she would most certainly not have any of him.

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the measly plot…

Why did she, Hermione Jane Granger, have to be stuck with biggest prat the world had ever known? Everyone assumed she would marry a Weasley. In fact everyone assumed she would become Mrs. Ronald Bilious Weasley. They wanted her to marry Ron and crank out seven or eight red haired children whose only thoughts were about quidditch and food. She wanted a life and a career. Sure she wanted children but not that many. And all in all, Ron was a nice bloke but he could be so inconsiderate sometimes.

He was one of her best friends that felt he was being noble by petitioning for her while he already had a girlfriend. What a bloody prat. Poor Luna was practically in tears when she found out. But she needn't worry because Ronald would not have a chance to go through with it. Hermione wouldn't let him. She was sick of it all. She would have none of it and she would most certainly not have any of him.

Unfortunately at the moment she didn't seem to have much of a choice. With the ministry's newest law out she would either have to marry Ron or some ex-Death Eater with in the next two months. The war was over and then the Ministry just had to screw everything up by doing this. The Marriage law had just been put in effect three days ago and so far she had yet to decide on one wizard to marry. Perhaps the problem was that all of the purebloods that had petitioned for her were all ex-Death Eaters with the exception of Ron. Or that's what Harry had told her.

Harry was the one reviewing her petitions since she couldn't stomach looking at them for too long. The poor bloke had tried to petition for her but he was not a pureblood wizard and therefore had no say in the matter. After finding out that he couldn't save her he sent out letters to every order member he knew requesting that they find a decent, unattached pureblood to marry her. The only problem was that as of yesterday Ron was the only one. Harry was due to report to her with news any minute.

Speak of the devil… there he was running down the corridor with rolls of parchment in his arms.

"Hermione! I've got great news… and I've got your other petitions." She grabbed him by the elbow and led him into the Head's common room that they shared. After they had both sat down on the carpet Harry emptied his arm load out in front of her. There had to be at least 25 petitions. She was, after all Harry Potter's best friend.

"Okay Mione, I've sorted out all of your petitions. You've got one from Crabbe, Goyle, Malfoy, Zabini, Flint, Nott, Ron, Charlie, George, Percy-" Hermione stopped Harry mid list.

"If I won't marry Ron then I can't marry any of his brothers, even if Charlie is extremely attractive and amiable. I refuse to marry any of the Weasleys." Harry sighed and waved his hands in a 'You-don't-have-to-tell-me-again-because-I-heard-you-the-first-time' manner and then continued with his list.

"Krum, Neville, a whole bunch of people that are much too old for you, my petition which doesn't count, and one from Sirius Black. I think Fred and George thought it would be funny to send that one." Harry watched as Hermione summoned a butter beer out of her room.

"Well, I am eliminating every one except Zabini, Neville, you, and Sirius." Harry started laughing but then realized who she had included in her final choices.

"You're actually considering getting married to Blaise Zabini?" Hermione shrugged and took a very large sip of her drink.

"He is a nice guy, even if he is in Slytherin. And he has stayed neutral during the war and he is my potions partner this year." Harry shook his head and ruffled up his hair.

"Well, let's hope you pick someone else. I would like to know that you are in good hands. At this point Neville is your best option." Just as Harry finished his statement, a large black owl tapped at their window. Harry went over to let it in. As he opened the letter his eyes went wide.

"Mione… I think you might like this one." Hermione stood up and looked over his shoulder at the official Ministry petition. She too was shocked.

"Harry, did you put him up to this?" Harry vigorously shook his head.

"No. I haven't had contact with him since the end of third year." Hermione took out a quill and some ink.

"Well as much as I like Neville, I don't think I could ever marry him. So it looks like we have a winner." And with that she signed her name on the parchment and called Hedwig over to bring the petition back to the Ministry.

--- two weeks later---

"Harry do you think I should put Ron at our table for the reception?" Hermione asked as she rearranged the seating for her wedding reception.

"No… he'd probably glare at you the whole time and then he might even try to strangle your fiancé. It would be better to put him at Luna's table." Hermione nodded in agreement.

"Do you think he'll ever be okay with this?" Harry smiled.

"It will take some time but I think he will come around. When he sees that you're happy he will move on." Hermione gave Harry a shy smile in return.

"I hope so. I think that I will be happy. Did you know I had a crush on him when I was younger?" Harry's eyes went wide and he put his quill down. After a few seconds he burst out laughing.

"You had a crush on your fiancé when you were thirteen? Oh this is rich! That's the sort of thing that only happens in cheesy romance novels, Mione. Ron's going to have a cow." Hermione started laughing with him.

"Please don't tell him. I think that might break his heart, poor guy. I think his face almost turned purple when he found out that I hadn't signed his petition." Harry grabbed a stack of invitations and a quill and started writing again.

"It shouldn't have shocked him that much. He knew you were waiting for other options. I told him so myself. Anyway, this leaves him free to pursue Luna now. Where are you going to place Remus and Tonks?" Harry looked over her shoulder and on to the parchment with names scribbled everywhere.

"They will be at the table with us. It will be you, Ginny, Remus, Tonks, his parents, me, and him." she said as she put her quill away. Harry nodded and turned back to the stack of invitations.

"That sounds like a good table. Now will the bride-to-be kindly help out her friend who has spent the last two hours slaving over the invitations?" Hermione stuck her tongue out at him and turned around.

"Nope, because I need your help with something. I'll finish the invitations later. Now, which do you like better lilies or roses?" Hermione turned to Harry with two large arrangements in her hands.

"Merlin save me…"

--- five weeks later---

"Hermione Jane Granger, stop pulling at your hair! I will fix it in a few minutes." Ginny Weasley was exasperated. Her best friend was getting married today and she was getting her ready.

"I know Ginny and I'm sorry. I'm just so nervous. What if this doesn't work out? What if he hates me?" Ginny watched as Hermione fiddled with a large diamond engagement ring that was sent to her by owl about three weeks ago.

"Hermione, he wouldn't have petitioned for you if he hated you. He must have liked you at some point." Hermione sighed.

"I suppose your right. Could you help me with my hair now?" Ginny chuckled as Hermione went back to her fidgeting.

"Sure Hermione."

--- five hours later---

All of the guest were seated and the wedding was about to start when Harry rushed up to Hermione and gave her a hug.

"Remus is going to be here in a second, Mione. You know I wanted to see you down the isle but you fiancé wanted me to be the best man. Haven't a bloody clue why though." Hermione laughed at Harry's antics and she saw Remus approaching out of the corner of her eye. Remus was walking her down the isle because her parents had died in a Death Eater attack before the end of the war.

"Because I asked him to. I wanted you to be and important part of my wedding and since your not a woman and Ginny would have killed me if a gave her position as maid of honor away, you have to settle for best man." Harry placed his hand over his suit covered heart in mock distress.

"How ever shall I live after this? I just don't know…" Hermione smacked him lightly.

"I'm sure you'll manage just fine. How is Ronald?" Hermione asked in concern. Harry's expression dimmed a little bit.

"He's still not happy that you turned him down but he's got Luna. They seem to be doing just fine so I think he'll be alright. You know he's always fancied you, so this is going to be hard for him. It would have been hard for him even if he hadn't petitioned for you." Harry took hold of her hand and squeezed it tight.

"I know Harry. I just hope he gets over it soon." Hermione sighed. Harry chuckled and handed her over to Remus.

"Me too Mione. Remus, take care of my girl. I want that video Collin is making to be perfect and that means the walk down the isle has to be spot on." Remus smiled.

"You got it Harry. Hermione you look beautiful." Remus said as Harry slipped back into the church. Hermione smoothed out her gown.

"Well, I sure hope he thinks so because that would be about five hours of prep down the tubes." Remus chuckled and stood up straight as the wedding march began.

"I don't think you need to worry about that. Are you ready?" Hermione took a deep breath and looked at Remus.

"As ready as I'm ever going to get."

--- a year and a few months later---

Hermione woke up to the sounds of the shower running. Although her morning sickness had long since been over she still hated the feeling of being pregnant. She couldn't see her toes. She couldn't sit properly at the table. She couldn't apparate with out fear of hurting the baby. And the worst thing was trying to get out of bed. Between the back aches, foot pains, and not being able to roll over she was having quite a time.

She eventually got out of bed and made her way into the kitchen to start breakfast. Just as she had finished the eggs the shower turned off. She made two cups of coffee, one with cream and sugar, which was hers, and one black, which was his. Her dear husband was not much of a morning person and wasn't quite awake until he had his shower and a cup of coffee. She set his breakfast on the table and waited for him to come out.

They had picked up this routine ever since she had gotten back from teaching Charms at Hogwarts for the summer. She found that the married life wasn't so bad… in fact it was pretty damn good. Hermione had come to love her husband over the year they had been together. Ron didn't like the arrangement but he had come to terms with it and was planning to ask Luna to marry him. Harry was still single. He was supposed to be coming over today to help paint the nursery room blue. Hermione wasn't allowed to do much work anymore.

Actually, Hermione didn't do much of anything anymore because she was nine months pregnant and about ready to deliver any day now. Harry was practically sleeping over at the house every night so he wouldn't miss a single minute of the birth. Hermione heard shuffling behind her and turned to see a very sleepy man downing a large cup of coffee.

"Good morning beautiful. How are your feet today?" Hermione smiled at his concern. He was always like that even if he was half asleep.

"They feel swollen but since I cant see them I wouldn't really know. Do you have a practice to go to? The team will need you if you want to win the World Cup this year." He smiled at her and hugged her close.

"The team can do without me for a few weeks. I am going to be here when little Christopher Harry Wood is born. And with the way Harry has been staking out this house for his Godchild's arrival, so will he." Oliver kissed her lightly and then turned to dig into the breakfast she had set out for him.

"Mione, has my Godchild arrived?" Harry Potter half screamed as he entered their living room.

"No Harry, and the more you ask the more anxious you are going to get and the more annoyed I will become." Hermione said with her hands on her hips. Harry gave her a hug and started devouring the second plate of food Hermione had set out.

"Fine, I won't ask until tomorrow morning. Twenty four hours is asking a lot from a bloke. The nursery will be done today and then we just wait for our next quidditch star to pop out and we'll be all set." Harry's eyes were filled with excitement and nervous energy as he downed a glass of orange juice.

"Well, I wish he would pop out now so I could finally see the lower half of my body." Hermione whined as she grabbed a piece of toast. The men both laughed at her.

"I'm going to get started on the nursery. You two love birds enjoy the free time." Harry said as he tried to smuggle more stuffed animals into the baby's room. Hermione sighed.

"He is going to spoil my son rotten." Oliver grinned and put an arm around her waist as he kissed her round stomach.

"Yeah, but at least he will be loved." Hermione watched her husband as he placed his ear to her belly in hopes of hearing their sons heart beat or feeling a kick. As she watched him she smiled. This whole Marriage Law arrangement was probably the best thing to happen to her in a long time.

End Comments: love it? hate it? well, it's not my favorite but I wanted to get it out as fast as possible so if you think it needs to be redone let me know.