I don't own anything. Just having some fun. This is the last chapter of this story. Please read and review.
April 19th One year after Hogwarts attack.
I have been instructed to write a journal of the events from last year. Dr. Patchwich from St. Mungo's suggests that I write everyday starting with the day I was shattered. This is a form of new therapy to help retrieve some of my old self back. Everything has changed and all those around me make attempts to draw me back into whom they remembered I was.
I see their tension and allow them to witness me writing to assuage their growing tensions. From their reactions they feel I have grown colder and distant. They want me to be who I was before. I keep painfully reminding them that their friend they knew had not existed for some time now and will not return. There is no reason to be gentle with their feelings as they obviously don't see that I have changed.
My emotions are a curiosity that I analyze daily. Especially those emotions I felt when I was bonded. I look at the emotion that I felt when I was raped. I view it as I do a movie that I've seen so many times. There is no longer emotion attached to the scene but I simply mimic the words spoken and check to see if I missed anything.
But I digress. I was shattered and yet I have not fallen apart. I was bonded very quickly after the shattering took place at Hogwarts. That morning Lucius discovered I had indeed created the potion he asked me to make including all the detailed notes one would expect from a professional. Disappointment littered his features as he was bound to reveal a part of his past.
'You are never to repeat what I tell you Hermione.'
I will digress once again and write what he forbade me to repeat. One can call this a form of revenge if I felt such an emotion towards the man.
'I have only changed in one aspect since my days at Hogwarts. I understand now what magic truly is.'
His story is interesting as it gave me a look into a part of wizarding society that muggle borns are not a part of. There is a culture and a mentality that holds ancient roots. From this story I understood were Voldemort found his power and why he is truly feared. All Voldemort used, was logic.
'My father viewed mudbloods as powerful as he but never allowed me to befriend one. He never allowed me to view their world believing it would taint my view of things. Little did I know then he was simply keeping things the way they've always been. My childhood was stagnant, filled with useless parties and social gatherings to give me a sense of culture and sophistication. My world was that of old magic that was no longer fully understood. Anyone that attempted to unlock the secrets was viewed as anti-social and dark. Even in a family of dark wizards and witches.
'There was nothing that I could keep secret from my family but any outsider would never hear word of my life. Every aspect of my life before Hogwarts was scheduled. When the letter arrived to say that I had been accepted to Hogwarts I knew I would finally have the freedom that I was denied for eleven years.
'The first two years I took advantage of the freedoms I was given from my parents. All the books I could ever read, stories form other students and the knowledge I grew up the same as many of the other students. Well…students of a certain pedigree. As a youth I was free but found that the constant study of all the subjects was rather boring and that I wanted, as well as others, was to explore beyond the rules set for us.
'Things remained the same until my seventh year when my friends and I found the confines of the school chafing and our home lives stifling. We heard about muggles breaking conventions and experimenting with their lives, setting new boundaries. It was unbearable for us wizards and witches who contain so much power and yet have fewer freedoms than muggles.
'One evening around the beginning of spring I heard about a wizard that broke conventions and was very powerful. The truth be told my friends and I saw him as a fake and soon would end up dead from misuse of the Dark Arts. But the stories told were better than anything read in books. We confessed that we were intrigued and wanted to learn more about this said wizard. Our opportunity came about three weeks later.
'We found out that there was a student who was a follower of this wizard. You know him, trust him and believe he's a good man Hermione. Severus was a year behind myself and very devoted to the Dark Arts. That will never change about him. You believe he's a spy for the Order and that he is no longer a Death Eater. You stupid child, the Dark Lord never allows anyone to leave once they have taken the dark mark.'
'I heard stories of others who had joined him. They used their magic so freely, with out guilt, without restraint it seemed. We relished the stories of being able to explore magic without it being called dark. It wasn't until I met the Dark Lord himself that I understood restraint is always needed but one should never hold back when learning something.
It surprised me that Voldemort was not feared but made fun of even and seen as some crack pot dark wizard. I could not help but notice the playfulness in his words. Voldemort is indeed a complicated man.
'The first Death Eater meeting I attended was not the grand ones you see today. They were rather informal and there was no dark mark then. That came a year later. The Dark Lord showed us purebloods the secrets of the ancient ways that have long been forgotten. It was the most delicious thing, to know knowledge that had been forbidden to you. To know things that our parents didn't bother to find out but seemed so proud of due to our ancestors achievements.
'When he first spoke to me he told me what I needed to know to be free of my family and to finally understand the ancient magic that surrounded Malfoy manor. There are more to these walls than expensive wall paper. For this information he demanded that I swear loyalty to him. I did and never looked back.
'The Dark Lord taught me curses and magic I had never known I could go. The conditioning of what is and isn't acceptable had to be removed. Yes Hermione, even the darkest of purebloods held back for many were too afraid they would die by the dark arts. The Dark Lord showed us a way past all the lies. Why do you think Dumbledore detests the dark arts so much? He knows how to use them.
'My father was furious of coarse when he found out what I had been doing and made his feelings clear with a few rounds of curses. He hated that I learned something that the family didn't know for centuries. I went against his express wishes and cursed me within an inch of my life.
'While I was healing from my father's round of punishments I knew I would never be free of him or the ignorance that surrounded my family. They were all content to simply let things continue as they have always had, allowing power to be given to those that don't have true magic. Mudbloods filtered in all areas of society weakening the bloodlines. There were so many like my self and we took our chance at power. Why so surprised? Not all of his followers believe all that he stands for. They simply wanted a voice that gave permission to go beyond the boundaries set for them. Use that head of yours Hermione.
'That night I killed my father then later the next day my mother who was returning from France. That is my story Hermione. I have no regrets.'
I stood before him in his study taking in all of his words. He seemed different to me now. Not some belligerent muggle hater but a man who was part of a generation that wanted change. Wizarding society holds a deep and dark past. He was at the forefront of his generations thinking and Voldemort took advantage of that. It all seemed so cruel to me then.
Shortly after his tale I had many questions being curious as I was and still am.
'Have things changed? Do wizarding families know the old ways?'
'In part yes.'
'Did you teach Draco?'
He looked at Hermione as if he wasn't sure he wanted to answer. 'Yes, and he knows well to keep it to himself until he has an heir. Why do you care?'
'You are not going to live for very long. Tell me what to expect when I'm shattered.'
Hermione looked down in sadness. For the first time she admitted that she will miss him. He no longer was some two dimensional villain. Lucius was a man with a family that he cared for and held a passion of beliefs that seemed to define him far better than his acts of cruelty.
'Will you miss me Hermione? Have you grown feelings for me? It surely can't be my story that swayed you so easily.'
'You're no different than me.'
He took her and shook her. 'I am no filthy mudblood.' He calmed down and caressed her face. 'Such a shame you are. You would have been a goddess in this world. All that intelligence and skill would have been honored. But all you are is some weak bitch that has been tossed aside and used again and again.' He stroked her face as he spoke knowing the affect it was having on her. He moaned as he spoke, insulting her.
'I won't be for long and you won't be here to see it.'
He turned her around so her back was to his chest. He knew his days were numbered as the Dark Lord had marked her as his own. He didn't want Hermione to see the anger that was on his face now. He had a strong feeling this would be the last time he would feel her in his arms and he was going to take advantage of that fact.
Throwing her on the floor he ripped off her clothes. Hermione didn't fight him. She wanted him in her, taking her as she knew they would not do this again. Something in her told her something was going to happen soon. She could feel it from him. His motions were tender betraying the cruel look on his face as his hands craft fully caressed her body. He was devouring the tender softness of her and took in her soft feminine sent.
In turn she felt his chest and powerful arms. The masculine smell of sex surrounded her and intoxicated her. He could be any man but he had entered her mind now and was as much part of her as her own limbs. She cursed herself at her own weakness that he so cruelly pointed out. She was weak but not for long and soon everyone would know it. Tears began to form. She didn't want him to see her as weak. She wanted him to see her as a powerful witch in his eyes.
He liked her tears away and kissed her. She was his until his last breath. There was great potential in the young woman beneath him. He cursed the fact she was of filthy blood. Such a waste. But in the end she was his.
Soon after I learned about the plans for the attack on Hogwarts. It was not surprise the attack would come. I left the manor as I needed to see for myself what the outcome was going to be.
Hogwarts Attack, one year ago.
Hermione stood up after a rather nasty blast from one of the death eaters. She made her way into the school after the wards were down. She got word the Voldemort was to attack the school and she left the Manor as fast as she could. Lucius would no doubt be here and would have more than a few words to say about that in the process. She didn't care she had to find Harry and tell him about the potion she brewed.
The students were rounded up but left unharmed while the teachers were forced to turn in their wands or the children would suffer. Some students fought back but were disarmed. For some reason Dumbledore was nowhere to be seen.
The fight didn't last long. Only about twenty minutes at the most. The attack was well planned and timed as to make sure there would be as little damage as possible. Things grew quiet but she knew there would still be skirmishes about and had to make sure that she was not seen. At the moment she was on neither side as she could not fight for the dark side and was not trusted by the light.
In the corridors she saw Ron. "Ron! Watch out!" She aimed at a Death Eater and stunned him. Ron bound him and ran towards Hermione with his wand out. He hesitated before speaking to her. "This does not settle things. You went back to them so I can't trust you."
"I know Ron. You can't trust me. I can't even trust myself. All I did was survive to the best of my abilities and now I am suffering the consequences. I won't deny you your anger towards me but I am not going to apologize for my actions."
Ron was angry because he loved her so much. "I loved you. I would have done anything for you and you knew it."
"Hermione is now dead. She's gone Ron and the sooner you realize that the faster you can move on."
"Shut up!! I am not a child Hermione. Over the past year I have learned I am far more perceptive than you ever were. I can judge a persons character within seconds of meeting them. Perhaps in part because you were not there." With that he fired a curse at her that threw her against the wall. She was ready for the next curse and fired one at him. He dodged it and fired back at her.
They played this game for a few minutes until she had enough. "Stop it Ron!! Stop it!!"
"What side are you on?"
"My own, Ron. Everyone is on their own side but is unwilling to admit it. You would join the Dark Lord in an instant if it meant keeping the ones you love safe. I have met many Death Eaters Ron and they all have their own side. Many would love for the Dark Lord to fall so they can gain their freedom back but at the same time they side with him because he gives them a voice."
"Can you hear yourself? You say his name as one of his followers."
Hermione was growing tired of this. "He is not so distant to me now. No longer is he a man that I read about in the papers."
Ron nodded understanding what she was implying in her tender Hermione way. It bothered him that there was still part of her left. "You are on your own side but are no longer light." He backed away from her and apperated now that the wards were down.
She had to find Harry and warn him about the potion she had made. There was something he needed to know about it. She ran down corridors and made sure to keep herself hidden in case someone wanted to target her from either side. She was seen as a wild card and no one knew what side she fought for.
Near the Great Hall she spotted Harry who was in a rather fierce fight with Voldemort who simply shielded the curses fired at him in annoyance. "Come on Potter I was sure that you had more fight in you than that. Didn't that old fool teach you anything? Or did you truly believe that love will conquer me?"
"I am stronger than you think."
"Your fame got to your head. You never earned a thing. I could teach you. I will always make that offer to you."
Keeping his guard up and squared him self for another round of curses. "Why is that? All you had ever wanted to do was kill me. I'm not a dark wizard and you'll never turn me."
Voldemort held a well practiced pause and spoke. "I was wrong Harry. I was wrong in trying to kill you. Did you know that you may be the only one that can one day oppose me? You are indeed powerful but have you ever wondered how you could speak Parsletounge? Those are my powers Harry. We are connected and will fight or help each other till the day one of us dies. I can call you Harry since we are no longer strangers? Trying to kill one another tends to make things personal."
"Shut up! I am nothing like you. This connection we have is an unhappy bit of humor caused by your mistake." Harry was breathing hard and was loosing focus as his anger grew.
Voldemort spoke as if he never heard Harry speak. "I shouldn't have killed your parents for I was too hasty and arrogant and that caused my death. If I had known then what I know today I would have simply waited a few weeks for your mother was dying of cancer Harry."
Hermione saw the look on Harry's face and knew that he had lost this fight. He wasn't ready for the cutting words. "Shut up!!" He fired a curse without thinking and was shot square in the chest by Voldemort. Harry bent over, dropped his wand to hold his chest. It was a powerful freezing curse, painful but not fatal.
Voldemort stood over Harry and pocketed his wand. "This is a wonderful prize. You will join me eventually Harry. You are still a young and have not discovered your core magic as of yet. Few ever do."
Harry fell to his side and screamed. The curse was more painful than he had thought as the freezing spread to his limbs. He lay on the ground defenseless and shivering. He wasn't going to give up and glared at his enemy who only looked down at him with a winning smirk. Bastard.
"You can come out of hiding Hermione. I know you are there." Voldemort turned in Hermione's direction.
"What are you going to do to Harry?"
"I am looking forward to the potion you brewed. Such skill for a witch your age."
Harry looked up at her. "What did you do?"
"Harry I am so sorry. I wanted to tell you before—"
"But now it's too late. I have both of you now." Voldemort pinned her to him and ordered one of his Death Eaters to take Harry to Headquarters as planned.
"My Lord she is not yours. Through my self and Narsissa she is loyal to you." Lucius walked up with a wand in hand.
"I always get what I want and she'll be mine soon enough my servant."
"She is mine. I have served you well and you'll kill me to have her. I have done nothing but fight for the cause and will continue to do so until my very last breath." He held himself up proud of all his loyalty.
Voldemort let Hermione go and she backed away to allow the men to fight. And fight they will.
"Ah yes, the cause you put so much energy into. You were so willing to learn Lucius when I first met you and you went far beyond my expectations. Then you became comfortable and stopped. You waited for orders from me. Willing to obey and no longer bothered to think."
"I have always sacrificed—"
"Sacrifice does not mean progress. Like a muggle you became comfortable and struggled and sacrificed at one level, never progressing."
Lucius was becoming angry and a little fearful. His master was not harming him yet which only meant that he was to suffer later to a greater extent. "I don't understand."
"Look at the witch you bedded every night. She holds more power than you know and you used her as some toy or pet to cuddle and later beat. What did I always say to you? There is no good or evil, only power and those strong enough to take it. Mudblood, pureblood, halfbood. There is only power and now she is mine."
"She. Is. Mine!"
Wands were raised and they started dueling. Voldemort was going to kill Lucius over her and she had to stop it. She ran out and got their attention. This only made things worse.
"Look at that, you can't control her. I instructed you to keep her at the Manor."
"I am no one's! I never have been and I will always be myself! I am not some weak minded child that you can taunt and play with anymore. I am a grown witch in my own right and I demand respect for that. Lucius you are going to die today because you only saw me as some toy to be used and played with. Those games are tiresome and I am no longer going to play. Go on then Voldemort. Kill him. Shatter me and watch as I go insane."
Hermione could feel the pain Lucius felt. Anger rose from him and he made to curse her but was defended by Voldemort.
"I agree with Hermione. Your games must end and mine shall begin." He aimed at Lucius ready with the killing curse. Hermione distracted him saving Lucius and in turn Voldemort threw her to the wall.
In a dazed state she saw a true magical fight that she only read in books. While being surrounded by dark wizards for a long time she had never seen them truly fight. Lucius was tiring quickly while Voldemort seemed to be ready to continue with vengeance. Finally she heard a sickening thud and she knew the fight was over.
She ran to Lucius who was bleeding on the floor. "Don't die! Don't die on me!"
"Such strength for a mudblood. Until today I thought you a weak child. So much power in someone so young and it's wasted on a mudblood."
Tears she didn't know she had for the man started to fall. "What will happen to me now? You never answered me before."
"You'll survive, like I have all these years. It will be harder for you. Two are gone instead of one. You're too smart to be a regular witch. Dumbledore held you back. Curse that old fool Hermione. He did you a great injustice. I didn't see it until you brewed that potion. You'll give the Dark Lord a fight in the end and he'll curse the day he crossed you. Though it may cost you your life."
"Don't talk like that. Hold on."
It was too late. Lucuis was gone and she felt it instantly. It was as if a part of her was tearing away and an emptiness filled her. She reached out to Narcissa who seemed to be fading as well. Both of them were leaving her. Hermione stood up wide eyed and screamed. Coldness was seeping into her and it was numbing her to her surroundings. She found she couldn't focus on anything at one time. Fear penetrated her.
Arms went around her pulling her close to a hard body. "Let me in Hermione. Focus on the link you have with me. It's the only way."
She struggled to get out of his grasp but found in her state that she was too weak to fight. The world around her was loosing its footing. Part of her wanted to know more about what Lucius said. She was just finding her power and now this happens.
"Give in to me. I'll hold your world together. Focus on our link." He held her close, breathing into her ear.
The link was very weak but she held on with her life. She could feel his heart beating, how his robes felt against his skin and how the sent of her hair was affecting him. Then his emotions took a turn.
"My Lord, let Hermione go." Snape stood within yards of the pair and was dead set on getting Hermione free of Voldemort.
"So you are the traitor. My most loyal of servants."
Snape was ready with wand out to do damage and knew he would need all of his skills just to distract his former master. "You can't have her. The boy is yours if you ever catch him again. Not her."
"His is already captured, spending some quality time with the rats in my dungeon."
Hermoine only caught part of the conversation but was still disturbed with that she heard. She was breaking from the link and she started to scream again. Voldemort was holding onto her with a vice grip knowing that Snape would take her away at the first chance he got.
"My Lord I must be the one to bond with her. If you do then she'll end up weakening you if she were ever killed."
It was true. He would be weakended but he would take precautions to make sure she never left his sight.
"Both of you." Hermione whispered out and was loud enough for both to hear. "Both of you can have me. Just end this for me." Desperation was filled her voice.
"Interesting proposition wouldn't you say Severus? I'll get to keep you in my service and I gain a wonderful asset." Voldemort stroked her face. "Hurry and make your decision Severus. She doesn't have much longer."
He waited and Hermoine spoke. "Please Severus. I need your help for I can't hold on much longer. Agree, I need you, I need one person I can trust."
Snape faltered and agreed, never letting his wand drop an inch. "I agree."
Voldemort nodded slowly lowering his wand. "We can't do this here. Apperate with me if you don't trust me to tell you the true location."
This would mean that he would be vulnerable to splicing if not done properly. He agreed and all three of them found themselves in Voldemort's bedroom. Each of them stood a moment and began to slowly make their way to the bed.
Voldemort placed Hermione on the bed removing her clothes. She was in a trance state as she was very nearly gone.
Hermione felt herself between the two men and felt their breath on her skin. Voldemort captured her mouth as Severus caressed her. She knew what would follow next. She gave in and allowed the build up to begin.
Voldemort and Snape spoke in unison with their wands and Hermione reached orgasm. "Together we bind her, together we'll share her. Once the union is made the binding will contain her."
Hermione fell unconscious between them with a smile on her face.
Snape could feel the connection between the other two and knew through Voldemort's emotions that he had just lost everything. Voldemort was overjoyed. He looked down if that was truly Hermione's smile or Voldemort's influence.
"Welcome back again my servant. Now that you are bound to me you will never leave my side. I forbid it." Within moments Voldemort was fully dressed again and apperated.
Snape held Hermione close. He wanted to let her know that he cared for her and would do anything for her. That she could indeed trust him.
Death of Narcissa
An unpleasant feeling grew in the pit of her stomach. She knew that Draco was coming home and would not be harmed in the battle. She insisted that he would be brought home for this. There was something else that unsettled her. Things were not going well. She saw Hermione run off the property and apperate away. A house elf spoke of Hermione leaving and she told he house elf to leave it alone and go clean something.
As she walked through the house she entered her husband's study. Normally she didn't bother with Lucius's business but something odd caught her notice. The folder containing Hermione's notes were still on the desk and unread. It was skillfully written in detail that would impress the most studious of potions masters. Potions was one of her strongest subjects at Hogwarts and she knows a good potions brewer when she saw one. At the bottom of the last page she wrote what she had planned and Narcissa laughed.
"Clever little bitch. The Dark Lord will be furious with you. Too bad I won't be around to see it when he punishes you." She pulled the page from the folder and set it on fire. "At least the Dark Lord will have one surprise coming his way as well as Potter." She laughed again at her little trick.
Once the page was reduced to ashes she felt a snap within her. She was shattering and felt her husband die. She quickly reached down and pulled up a vial out of her pockets and drank the contents down. A sickly orange haze surrounded her then within seconds she was dead.
Little did she realize that she had an audience watch her. Draco stood in the doorway with a note in his hand written to him by his father. He always knew that his parents carried fast acting poison on them in case the other had died. He was alone now with no protection or guidance that he was familiar with. He fell down against the door jamb and for the first time he screamed.
Well this is end of this story but it will continue into another story. I do apologize for such an abrupt ending but I could no longer drag the story out. Please review. I hope to post the next story by next week.