A/N: Another little story. To those who read my stories, I'm so so so sorry that I haven't finished Going Under. I have my storyline, plot development, etc. I just can't get the characters past this one spot in my chapters. I'm trying though! Anyway, read on! This is, of course, a SessKag. A short little vignette from Kagome's point of view. Slight Kag/OC, but nothing too harsh. Has anyone been able to guess my inspiration? Music!
Disclaimer: As my daddy says: "I'm poor! I have no money! If I did, then I wouldn't be where I was." And I would definitely own them if I had money.
"She Let Herself Go"
After the last pin dropped, the last straw was laid on the camel's back, the last everything, she left him. The stunted emotional growth coupled with the (she believed) sociopathic behavior and all out screaming match over one purse ended their five year relationship. After all, she was definitely deserving of more than a man who didn't appreciate her talents any further than the bedroom. So why was she still hung up on him two years later?
She caught herself thinking of him daily during unimportant tasks. She would remember how Sesshoumau poured his tea or folded his laundry (when the stuck-up bastard did his own), yawned, and even how he used to salt his food. These thoughts, while extremely annoying to her emotional state, she was capable of handling. But the traitorous thoughts of how his body felt above her or how he used to make her feel she couldn't take much longer. Especially when she had a loving, caring boyfriend right next to her.
More and more her friends began to notice how her eyes didn't sparkle like they usually did; they noticed her spirit seemed almost deflated.
She was unhappy. And still in love.
But love wasn't everything, right? A relationship had to have much more than love to survive. She needed trust and respect and support and...stability. Peace. All of those were qualities her relationship with Sesshoumaru had lacked, but Hojo had given her. She knew no matter what that Hojo would always protect and provide, but she would have to settle to feel that comfort and companionship. Because she just didn't love him like she loved Sesshoumaru.
Damnit all to hell.
Her life continued to travel down what she called 'The Road To Travesty;' she knew her life had just spun horribly out of control when she began to spot him out at her favorite night-spots. He usually came alone, but occasionally had one or a few friends with him. And each time he stared her down like she was a piece of meat he wished to devour and acted like the caring friend he should have been. She began to go out with her girlfriends more and more to get a glimpse of him and maybe, just maybe, get a 'hello' and a smile one night.
The night she finally got a hello she ended right back up in his bed. And it was a wonderful night. Unfortunately, she knew she had a boyfriend to go back to and she was sure he didn't want her around anymore.
She left Hojo that day, chossing to move back in with an ex-roomate than deal with half a relationship anymore.
Her nights alone were horrible, and the weekends a version of rosckstar living. Alcohol, parties, and late nights blended in with the heartache.
But she still saw him.
But it all turned out for the best; continual sightings, meetings, a final confession of her 'singleness,' and 'bedroom activities' brought her and her ex-lover back together. He had matured enough to respect her as a woman and she had learned how to control her damnable temper.
This was how Kagome Higurashi learned that it is true that if you let the 'bird' go and it comes back, it is truly meant to be.