Worst Nightmare

By Sciathan File

For Pinkangelsakura

It must simply not be Haruhi's day today…of course it rarely was her day where the Host Club was concerned.

Today, the normal brawl over costuming had literally almost reached Biblical proportions. Unfortunately for the rest of them, Tamaki had stayed up late (almost to 1 o'clock in the morning, in fact…far beyond his usual bedtime) and read through the entirety of Dante's The Divine Comedy and decided that the Host Club itself should dress as angels and demons to suit the needs of their customers. (His exact words were that the students of Ouran needed a bit more divinity in their lives and that he, the gorgeous and noble soul that he was, would be able to angelically fulfill their desires).

In fact, the eccentric King of the Host Club had almost immediately donned a billowing set of wings and a halo that (and Haruhi had few doubts about this fact because they were the rich bastards that they were…) was of solid gold.

Hunny, all at once declaring the wings cute(!) also opted to play the role of an angel, and Mori silently followed suit.

Surprisingly, Kyouya had been the first to decide to play the part of a demon. Laughing perhaps a tad bit too realistically, he claimed the accompanying pitchfork and horns, and donned the black cape set out for him. Although no one was brave enough to say so out loud, the other members all decided amongst themselves that it was a particularly apt role for him…likewise, the Hitachiin twins had little difficulty choosing their appropriate roles. Then, putting their props to good use, they engaged in having a very good time chasing Tamaki around and attempting to skewer him with their pitchforks.

The ranks being split equally between the devils and the angels, Haruhi's role was problematic and contentious from the very first.

Having been, until her entrance, merely been engaged of the activities of being driven about in circles and yelling frantically, Tamaki, in order to make a favorable impression upon his precious daughter, tried to put on a brave and angelic face. However, he did this as Hikaru was making a particularly vicious stab and instead was knocked to the floor in a decidedly un-angelic fashion.

Had anyone asked Haruhi she would have chosen to play a demon, simply for the practical reason that the overly large wings of the angel characters carried with it the potential to knock over other expensive items and give Kyouya even more reasons to increase the amount of debt that she owed the club.

However, as usual, no one thought to ask her.

Indeed, it was almost a relief when Kaoru and Hikaru placed the horns on her head in their triumph over the fallen archangel.

Tamaki could not, however, settle for his precious daughter to be so blasphemed (as well as miss out on the opportunity to make her look cute!) and, through a large amount of exertion managed to place the cumbersome pair of wings on her despite her best wishes.

In the end, Haruhi was neither angel nor demon…but a strange looking mix of the two warring sides.

She did, however, decide that the wings had gone to Tamaki's head, as his normally saccharine lines were now positively cavity inducing (they contained such memorable lines as "I would bring you to heaven and place you as a beautiful star in the sky forever." And, for perhaps the hundreth time that day she wondered if the entire female population of Ouran was susceptible to such trivial lines).

Besides the copious amounts of swooning girls, the only moment of particular significance (except for Haruhi managing to sweep an antique tea cup off a table with her large wingspan, exactly as she had feared, and Kyouya's calm response of smiling calmly and jotting down the event in his ledger…however, no one really noted this as a significant event besides Haruhi herself) was Hunny's…rather un-angelic behavior.

At the center of this, was unfortunately Renge, who for the sake of variety and diversity within the characters of the Host Club, objected violently to Hunny's choice of a costume for the event.

Indeed, in her usual long-winded, otaku saturated speeches, she declared that Hunny's cute side should at all times merely mask his inner demon. Renge concluded by saying that everyone had missed a perfect opportunity to further develop his character through the use of roleplay.

Delivering this speech to a slightly mortified Hunny, she also managed to twirl into his table and sweep its contents, most notably his favorite cake, onto the floor. He merely stood, staring at it, before assuming a rather different look in his eyes.

If Renge wanted to see Demon Hunny…she had unwittingly succeeded.

However, Mori quickly took control of the situation and somehow managed to produce (the rest of the club members had the good sense not to question exactly where it had come from) another cake. While not his favorite variety, it defused the situation just enough to allow Renge to escape.

The large group of girls who had designated Hunny for the event, however, were quite enthralled by the change in events and talked incessantly among themselves about Demonic Hunny for weeks.

Finally, the hour of event ended and the Host Club once again found themselves alone in the club room, (more or less) attending to club business.

Well, everyone but the Host Club's King…who was, well, otherwise disposed.

Indeed, he was very surprised when Haruhi, who he had thought had been in the room, came through the music room's doors in tears.

Taking action, as is demanded of any principal male character within a romantic comedy, he immediately ran to her and enfolded her in his arms.

"Tama-senpai…" She began, choking on her sobs, "Haruhi must apologize to you!"

Tamaki, as fitting his role, gently wiped her tears away, flashing his bright smile at her.

"Haruhi," he said, tilting his head up at her at the perfect 3/4ths angle, "I don't ever want you to apologize to me for anyt-"

"But Senpai!" she immediately protested, looking uncertainly at the door.

Suddenly a black hooded figure burst into the room, pushing Tamaki roughly away from Haruhi and holding her possessively. Shock at the treatment of their noble lord flashed over the faces of the remainder of the members of the club.

"Haru…hi…?" He barely managed to choke out.

"Senpai…Haruhi is sorry that she can't be all love-love with you anymore…Haruhi has found…another!" She turned to embrace the unnamed figure that was seemingly a member of the Black Magic Club, petals drifting through the scene.

Every word that she said was like a cold dagger straight to his heart, as his precious Haruhi, his devoted daughter (!) willfully betrayed him.

"Who…who are you that is trying to seduce my only precious daughter?" Tamaki finally shouted at him in an act of desperation.

The figure slowly extricated himself from Haruhi's passionate grasp and reached up to remove his hood…turning to Tamaki to show a face that was…

Absolutely blank.

Tamaki, still well in the throes of the nightmare, sat bolt upright while shouting, "It's Satan! The Devil! Haruhi!"

And the sight that greeted him (comfortingly bereft of any mysteriously robed figures) was the rather mischievous smiles of the Hitachiin twins (both of which had conveniently forgotten to remove their horns).

However, it was Kyouya who broke the silence.

"Perhaps you should sleep at home Tamaki, rather than during the hours of the club."

"And Tono" said Hikaru, wagging a finger in perfect synchronization with Kaoru, "Your loud talking was disturbing those of us who weren't sleeping through the club's business-"

"-And saying such strange, unsavory things."

They both then did a rather unflattering impression of his shouting "Haruhi!"

As he assumed his normal posture in the corner, Tamaki wished for a moment that they had remained chasing him around with pitchforks.

However, as soon as he heard Kyouya say, "Haruhi, the new accounting on your debt has been completed, so you are free to go if you wish." Tamaki once again sprang up in order to vindicate his much maligned reputation.

"Haruhi!" He pleaded, taking her face in his hands in a supplicating gesture, "Certainly you don't believe those uncouth twins' untruths about your Father?"

"Senpai," she said, affecting a fierce indifference, "Please refrain from sexually harassing me and dreaming strange thoughts about me and the devil."

Tears streaming out of his eyes, he once again found himself in his corner of dejection.

His cute daughter's cold rejection was almost as much of a nightmare as her illicit (and he once more failed to remind himself that it was, indeed, imaginary) love-love relationship against his wishes.

Fin