A/N: Oh boy. Oh boy oh boy. I'm so sorry, I don't even know what to say. It's been foreverrrr since I've updated and i dont even know if this chapter will live up to your expectations, because its not very funny... Maybe that was part of the reason why i didnt update for so long, but another part of course, was laziness. And then of course i've been busy, but hey! I told you all i wouldn't forget about this story!
REVIEWERS I LOVE YOU ALL THANK YOU SOOSOO MUCH FOR STICKING WITH ME.
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
If anyone has an idea for a story, i'd love to hear it. Seeing as I don't know what to do with myself now that this story is finished.
Lily blew her hair out of her eyes with a sigh, her chin resting in her palm. She tiredly turned the dusty page of the large book that was resting on one of the tables in the library. She felt her eyes begin to flutter close, but quickly shook herself, forcing her eyes to scan the page of potions in front of her. She found herself jerking out of her reverie quite suddenly as someone came blundering into the library. Lily narrowed her eyes at Sirius, could he make anymore of a ruckus?
Panting, he spotted Lily and quickened his pace. When he reached the table, or rather, stumbled into it with a surprising amount of force, he splayed his palms across the table and said heavily, "She's after me."
"Who is after you?" She asked bitterly, heaving the book that Sirius had caused to fall onto her off of her lap.
"Elizabeth." He said, looking over his shoulder worriedly. "I think she might kill me."
Lily rolled her eyes, slamming her book closed and getting to her feet, "Why would she want to kill you?"
"Because I told her who we really were."
"You WHAT?!" Lily shrieked. Ignoring the librarian's disapproving glare, she leaned across the table and grabbed a fistful of Sirius' robes. "If you weren't in my body I think I'd have to kill you, too."
"Lily." He said, plucking off her hand with some struggle, "You're looking like an abuser again."
She gritted her teeth and strode around the table, leaning so close to his, or rather, her own face, that she was a mere two inches away. "What were you thinking?"
"I was thinking that I'm tired of keeping this a secret. Who knows how long we're going to be stuck like this? People are bound to know."
Lily took a few deep breaths, struggling to remain calm, "I thought," She said between clenched teeth, "That we had agreed to only tell James."
He took a step back, "Yeah, well, that was before I decided that I should tell Elizabeth." He gazed at the books scattered about on the table, "What were you doing?"
"Researching." She snapped, "Now, tell me exactly what you said."
"What does it matter?" He said, sighing as if Lily was a great drag, "I told her that I'm really Sirius and you're really Lily and she sort of…lost it, I guess."
"You don't say." She said in mock wonder, "I would have been completely calm and accepting and one hundred percent believing."
"I know, right?" Sirius said, "That's why I don't get why she didn't believe me…" He trailed off, "Oh, you were joking, weren't you?"
"You don't miss a thing."
"Anyways, she started chasing me out of the room, screaming that I was mad." He rubbed the back of his neck, "I'm pretty sure the friendship between you two is over."
Lily grabbed his arm in a claw like grip, "You are the most infuriating, thick minded…"
"Lovers quarrel?" James asked from behind, causing startled leaps from the both of them.
Sirius rubbed his arm sorely, "James, you great oaf. Stop jumping to conclusions and listen to us."
James folded his arms, "I don't know if I want to hear what you two have to say."
Lily stared at him, her cheeks flushing. She had just pronounced her love for him in his best mate's body….
"I'm not Lily Evans." Sirius blurted. "I'm Sirius Black in Lily's body."
"We accidentally drank a potion that caused us to sort of switch places." Lily said hurriedly upon seeing James' disbelieving look.
James said nothing, in fact, he did something quite surprising. He rubbed his temples and walked around the table, leaving Sirius and Lily to stare at the ground.
"It was worth a shot." Sirius mumbled.
It was then that their head aches returned. They were just as painful as the ones they had received upon switching bodies, which could only mean one thing….
"We're switching back!" Lily said excitedly, her eyes began to water with pain.
"Wait a minute…" Sirius said as the pain began to subside, "I'm still you." He whirled around to see James, standing over him triumphantly, his shoe in his hand.
James Potter had in fact smacked the pair of them on the top of their head with his shoe.
"YOU DO REALIZE YOU JUST HIT A GIRL!" Lily shouted angrily.
James shook his head, "I can't be sure which one is Sirius and which one is Lily, so I hit you both, just in case."
"OH I'M DONE WITH THIS!" Lily screamed, earning a reproachful look from the librarian who was busy clambering to her feet.
Lily bent down and pulled off her shoes, "These…" She said, "Are not mine." At this she threw them viciously at James." She removed Sirius' cloak and thrust it aside, "That isn't mine." She pulled off her shirt, now revealing Sirius' bare chest, "That is not my shirt." She was breathing heavily, her face screwed up in rage, "AND THESE!" She shouted, tearing off her trousers, "ARE NOT MY PANTS!"
"MR. BLACK!" Squealed the librarian. "THAT IS QUITE ENOUGH!"
The students scattered around the library were getting to their feet, looking towards the three students curiously.
Lily looked down at Sirius' body, which was now clad in only boxers and dark socks.
"THIS IS NOT MY BODY!" She cried desperately.
"YEAH!" Sirius shouted, having already removed his cloak and now heading for his blouse, "THIS IS NOT MY SHIRT."
"DON'T!" Lily whirled around to face him, her finger that was jammed into his chest shook angrily, "YOU DARE REMOVE THAT SHIRT."
"I'm calling Mr. Filtch!" The librarian said, scurrying out of the library.
"THIS IS NOT MY BODY!" Sirius said, then, gazing over his real body, the one that Lily was currently fuming in, muttered, "That one is…thank Merlin…it's gorgeous…"
James' eyebrows were lost somewhere in his hairline. He had stumbled back into chairs upon hearing Lily's fuming rampage.
"No…it can't be." He said, his eyes trailing from Sirius back to Lily.
"Potter." Lily said through clenched teeth, "Can you please find it in yourself to get it through that thick oaf of a brain…"
"Don't be such an arse." Sirius said to James.
Students were now milling into the library upon hearing the commotion, several girls swooning at Sirius' half naked body.
James watched in awe as who he thought was Lily trail her hand over Sirius' bare chest, "Oh how I've missed my chizzled stomach…."
Lily smacked his hand away in annoyance.
"Bloody Hell." James whispered, looking at Sirius, "It is you Sirius…."
"Mr. Black, Miss Evans." Came a stern voice.
Lily felt her heart plummet, "Professor McGonnagall."
"I will see you two in my office, immediately." Her lips were barely visible as she nodded curtly, indicating for Lily and Sirius to follow her. She turned on her heel and swept away, leaving James to gaze at the two before him. More than half the school was trying to shove their way into the library, but James could feel the anger pulsing through his veins.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"We wanted to…" Lily said.
"But Dumbledore made us promise not to." Sirius finished.
"What about the promise you made to always be honest with me?" James said, the anger beginning to ebb away as hurt began to take over. "I trusted you both."
With that he swept pass them, a dreadful silence following as the students parted to make room for him to pass through them.
Lily and Sirius looked at each other sadly before following him out. A few girls winked at Lily, still in Sirius' body as they left. They reached McGonagall's office and entered without bothering to knock, throwing themselves in chairs across from her desk.
Their Professor thrust open a drawer and scrambled inside for a moment, before revealing two small bottles filled with a dark, thick liquid. She slammed them on top of her desk and leaned forward, her eyebrows narrowed so that they made a thin line.
"What do you both think you were doing?" She asked crisply, "I expected better, especially from you Miss Evans. When Professor Dumbledore told you to keep this a secret, I do believe that removing your clothes in the middle of the library and causing a scene is not the best way to uphold your promise."
She took a deep breath, her eyes flashing, "And you, Mr. Black. Running around in a diaper…" She paused, and for a moment, Sirius and Lily could have sworn they saw a shadow of a smile sweep across her eyes before they narrowed once more, "I know that this must not be easy."
They nodded glumly.
"And I know you're trying your best, but that simply is not good enough." She paused, "For the most part, you two have kept your heads. Aside from the scenes the pair of you have caused, I know you that you have tried. I trust you've learned something from this experience?"
They blinked, "Well," Lily spoke first, "I don't know what you mean by learned, but I guess you can say that I've learned quite a bit about Sirius."
"And I about Lily." He said, grinning slightly.
"I see." Professor McGonagall said, her voice beginning to soften, "I know you two don't get along, but…"
"Actually," Sirius interrupted, "I'm kind of starting to warm up to her." He winked, "When she's not trying to hex me into next century."
Lily sighed, "Professor, we're really sorry. It's just all of this stress and on top of that schoolwork…"
Professor McGonagall held up her hand to silence her, "I have no doubt you two half been under enormous amounts of stress. However, that does not mean I am not extremely dissapointed in the pair of you."
"Here," She said, shoving the bottles toward them, "Take a drink both of you."
"What is it?" Sirius asked skeptically, carefully removing the lid.
"A potion." She said, smiling slightly, "To return you back to your former selves."
Lily gagged on her spit, "WHAT?!"
"Professor Dumbledore had it concocted this morning." She said, "You two should be very pleased, with all he has going on, it's a wonder he made time to do something like this…."
Sirius raised his shaking fingers to the bottle just as Lily did the same. They turned to each other slowly, "Well," He said, "I guess this is it. Cheers."
The both downed half of the bottle, just to be sure. Just when they were both thinking that this was some sort of cruel joke, they felt it – a strong feeling that seemed to grip their heart and jerk their bodies slightly. They laid panting, sliding down in the chairs moments later.
Lily slowly turned her head and felt tears of joy sting the back of her eyes, "Sirius!" She cried, "Have I ever told you how incredibly handsome you are? I never thought I'd be as happy as I am now to see your face…."
Sirius brought her into a hug, his arms trembling as he rubbed her back in small circles. "We're back." He said, "I'm a man again."
"Boy." Lily corrected him, pulling back and smiling.
"Very well," Said Professor McGonagall sternly, but the corners of her mouth twitched. "Mr. Black, could you please go back to the library and put your clothes back on?"
Lily stared at the fire that night, hugging her arms to herself and rocking back and forth. She was back in her own body, yet why did she feel so…empty? She sighed and brushed her hair off of her face, watching the flames lick the inside of their crate.
"Er…Lily?" Came an uncertain voice from behind her.
Lily spun around, "James!" She said, almost breathlessly, "What are you doing here?" For all she knew everyone else had gone to bed.
"I live here."
"Oh…" She felt a blush creep into her cheeks, "Right. Good night then."
She turned back to the fire, silently pleading with herself to turn back around. To say something…anything, but she stared firmly at the dancing flames, although her figure seemed to droop slightly more.
A few moments later she felt a hand place itself lightly upon her cheek. She upturned her head slowly to look at James. "James, I-"
"Lily, you could have at least told me that you and Sirius and switched back." He was smiling slightly. "A while after the library incident I realized I had over reacted, so I went to find you, thinking you were still in Sirius' body. I found him and I began giving this big speech, but then Sirius turned around and was all, 'James. I'm Sirius again.'" James paused, "Merlin, you two have a lot of explaining to do."
"I know. And James I'm sorry we hurt you. We should have told you sooner."
"Wait." He said suddenly, "So all this time Sirius was really…you?"
"So…that time at The Three Broomsticks…when Sirius kissed me that was really you?"
"But of course…you were really drunk," He added hurriedly.
"But I can't help but wonder if you…I don't know…kind of…"
"I knew what I was doing." She interrupted.
He smiled, "Y-you mean you meant to?"
"Of course." She said, "I saw a different side of you when I was in Sirius' body."
James winced, "Is that good or bad?"
"James Potter, use your brain." She laughed, "I kissed you didn't I? I came onto you in the Room of Requirement. I made Sirius seem like he was completely in love with you…"
"Are you?" He asked suddenly, finally removing his hand from her cheek and sitting down next to her. He gazed at her intently, "Did you mean all that stuff you did? Or was it a prank against Sirius?"
She gave a sort of half smile. "Did you mean what you said to 'Sirius' on the couch? About you really liking me?"
"Of course." He paused. "So what happens next? This all seems so sudden. First you hated me, then Sirius seemed like he liked me, then I figure out you two had switched bodies, then you switch back just as I am beginning to accept it, and now. Now I don't know what's happening."
She shrugged, "What do you want to happen?"
"I want to kiss you." He said without hesitation. "The real you. Not you in Sirius' body. Not your body with Sirius in it just waiting to knee me just below the belt."
They paused and laughed.
"I want to kiss you, too." She said, "In my own body, that is."
He leaned forward slightly, capturing her lips with his. "You have no idea how long I've waited for that." James said as they pulled back.
Sirius scrambled through the portrait hole. "That was cute." He said as they leaned in once more. "And about time."
He sprinted over and flew onto the couch, laying across their laps and crushing them both. They laughed and leaned back to watch the fire.
"Everyone in the school knows about us, Lil." Sirius said, looking up at Lily.
"I know." She said softly, patting his head. "But it's alright, at least that will clear up all of the awkward situations we had." She paused, "Even though that was one of the most horrific experiences of my life, us changing bodies, I'm not entirely sure I'm completely upset that it happened." She looked at James. "A few good things have come out of it."
"You're telling me." Sirius said, "Elizabeth agreed to go out to dinner with me." He paused, "After we had talked things over and she decided not to kill me of course."
They sat staring at the fire for quite some time before Lily began to feel her eyelids get heavy. She slowly leaned her head on James' shoulder and drifted off into a comfortable sleep.
"I'm glad you two returned to your rightful bodies." James said to Sirius suddenly.
"I am too, mate," Sirius said, watching the flames, "I am too."
A/N: I don't know you guys...i don't know. Ah well. i tried, and its 1:40 in the morning. and i know it wasnt that humorous, but this story was kind of goofy so hopefully the earlier chapters made up for that. if you want a funny story, just give me an idea and I'll see what i can do. I'm still gonna update stories, so dont forget about me!
I LOVE YOU ALL!