Gabriel/Raphael for 30Kisses (in no particular order)

Title: Imbalance

List: Beta #18 – Endless

Fandom: Angel Sanctuary

Pairing: Gabriel x Raphael

Warnings: I think the cracktastic pairing says it all.

Disclaimer: "Angel Sanctuary" and all related material are property of Kaori Yuki 1995.

To be honest, he has always thought that she is beautiful. She really is one of God's most perfect creations. Not only is her physical shape a delight to behold but there was something about her spirit that had always drawn him to her. He supposes that was why they were always getting on each other's nerves.

She was dedicated to her position and to upholding the laws of Heaven like few others could ever dream of being. She had a strength that was belied by a fragile, almost childlike appearance. She had a fierceness about her that contradicted her serene countenance and placid manner.

She truly was the essence of water.

He does not come here often. He does not come in the daytime when he could easily excuse his presence. He does not see her by sunlight.

He comes here when his need outweighs his common sense and his will to survive. He comes at night when it is late, when others will be leaving for their beds, when there will be no more meetings, when there is nowhere else to say he is on his way to, when there is nowhere else for him to go. He always, always sees her by moonlight.

She was radiant, a holy embodiment of the Moon.

Smirking bitterly, he reaches out a hand and caresses her cheek. How long has it been this cold? He remembers a time when these selfsame cheeks flushed hotly and these vacant blue eyes sparked. Vibrant and furious, she was captivating.

He allows his hand to fall limply beside him. How he wishes he smoked. At least then he would have something to do. Did she not know? Did she not realize what had been happening to him? What has happened to him? Why was she so blind?

But then again, they had all been blind to many things. Each paid a separate price; some – like him – paid a toll to carry on as though there was nothing wrong, to continue living in a well-fabricated lie. Others – like her – were charged phenomenally because they would not and, he believed especially in her case, could not stand by and watch the corruption of Heaven.

He kneels before her, fully aware that what he is doing and feeling borders on idolatry. But he would sin, again and again, if only she would breathe. If only she would speak one word… any word. If only…

'If only' is a form of torture. How it has escaped Sevothtarte's notice is a mystery.

If only she knew how long he has been confined to this state of limbo. His emotions are from a time long before she'd gone. Long before her skin chilled. Now, when he thinks about it, if ever he is brave enough to think about it, he has probably felt this way since before the age of man, since before the fall of Lucifer, since before the war against Alexiel.

Once more, he raises his hands to her face – both of them, trembling like an addict. Gently, reverently, he places his flesh on hers. Then, he does what he has always wanted to do. It is something he feels should be done by two: two people, two living entities, not one angel and an empty shell. Yet it is all he can have for the moment.

Her lips are chapped and frigid in their stillness. His are warm and broken, bleeding where he has bitten. Someone will find his blood. If they do not, he will escape notice for one more day.

He keeps his eyes open. His stare is angry, demanding from her that which he knows he will not receive. Her eyes remain blank. He kisses her harder, nearly brutally. Her head tilts backward and he follows, rising to his feet, all the while still connected to her shell.

He will not plunder her mouth any further. Her taste is something he wants to sample when she is conscious. She will taste like paper now. He wants to taste moonbeams on water. He has never violated barrier of her lips.

The one-sided kiss ends abruptly. He wipes first his mouth then hers. He will go on a little longer. Maybe, one day, she will come back to them. Only God knows where she has gone. But he will wait.

Another bleak visit has ended. Its meaning is endless.

Author's Note: Written for the LiveJournal community 30kisses, with a few chapters of the actual manga out-of-order in the author's head. Reviews are my happy pills.