Trouble In Las Vegas


Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist…big shocker there…

Warning: This fic makes no sense and is just to help you have a good laugh.

"Brother…I think we're lost," Al states. The two Elric brothers have been searching for the Philosopher's Stone for a long time now, but still no leads. And sadly, Ed has to return to Colonel Mustang empty handed once again.

"We're not lost Al! I know exactly where we're going!" Ed fumes.

Ed and Al are at a train station in some city when they are supposed to be in Central meeting up with Colonel Mustang.

"Aren't we supposed to meet up with the Colonel and the others?" Al asks as he follows his brother out onto the busy streets of whatever town.

"Yeah, but it won't hurt if we go on a little vacation now would it?" Ed replies.

"No brother. I guess it couldn't," Al replies carefully. "Where are we anyway?"

"I think it's called Las Vegas," Ed replies scratching his head.

"Well, brother…what do people do in Las Vegas?" Al asks innocently.

Ed slowly turns to his younger, uninformed, brother and replies, "Al…I'll tell you when you are a bit older…"

The two begin to walk down the lit up streets of the Sin City itself. Ed finally finds a suitable hotel for he and his younger brother to stay in. They walk inside the tall, 18-story building and walk up to the registration desk.

"May I help you?" Asks the snobby clerk behind the desk.

"Yeah! We were wondering if we could have a room. With two beds preferably," Ed asks.

"Aren't you a bit…small to be on your own in this city?" The clerk asks.


"He didn't say that brother," Al replies embarrassed.

After several minutes of talking and bribing, Ed and Al were finally given a room. And the first thing on Ed's to do list…The All You Can Eat Buffet!

"Are you coming Al?" Ed asks as he heads down the hall to the elevator.

"I think I'll check out the city brother…you know…since I can't eat," Al replies.

"Ummm…ok. We'll meet back at the room around eleven then," Ed replies as the elevator door closes.

Now where to go…

While Ed was enjoying the buffet, Al was walking down the streets of Las Vegas looking at all the lights and people in strange costumes. Suddenly, Al decides to walk into one of the buildings, but unfortunately doesn't know what is inside, which will be one of his many mistakes.

Al walks into a room full of smoke and sits down at a table near a stage. There seems to be many women and even some women from the military.

I wonder what they are all doing here…

And just like on cue, women begin to clap and whistle toward the stage. Al turns to his attention toward the stage.

Oh no…

Ed is stuffing his face and enjoying every minute of it.

This is the life!

But Ed's enjoyment is interrupted when Al runs in and yells, "Brother!"

"Al! What is it? Is it Envy?" Ed asks as he runs toward his brother.

"No! Worse!" Al yells.

"What?" Ed asks.

"I saw Colonel Mustang!" Al replies.

"And the problem?" Ed asks. "I can just make up some excuse."

"No brother! I went into one of the buildings and there was a stage and a lot of women in the audience…Colonel Mustang was on stage!" Al replies.

"Doing what?" Ed asks shocked.

"I don't know! I left before anything happened…" Al replies. "Brother…I'm scared…"

After calming down and finding inner peace, Ed and Al decided that Las Vegas wasn't for them and decided to leave immediately.

They finally made it to Central and went strait to Mustang's office.

"Is the Colonel in?" Ed asks Riza.

"Yes. He just got back from his vacation," Riza replies.

"Let me guess.…Las Vegas," Ed shudders.

"How did you know?" Riza asks.

"Lucky guess…may I speak to him now?" Ed asks.

"Sure…you and Al can go right in," Riza replies.

"Thank you," Al adds.

Ed knocks on the door and is greeted with a , "Come in!"

Ed and Al walk in and sit down in the chairs in front of Roy's desk.

"Why are you two late? You were supposed to be here two days ago!" Roy yells.

"We…got distracted," Ed replies.

"That's no excuse!" Roy yells.

"Like you're one to talk!" Ed yells.

"What are you talking about?" Roy yells as he stands up.

"We know about you being in Las Vegas and doing things!" Ed accuses as he stands as well.

"What Ed? What do you think I did? Strip?" Roy yells.

"Well….yeah!" Ed replies.

"No you idiot! I have more respect than that! I was doing stand up comedy!" Roy yells.

"Oh…" Ed and Al say at the same time.

"I think I deserve an apology!" Roy replies.

Ed rolls his eyes and says, "I'm sorry."

"Good! Now go write up that report!" Roy orders.


So…I hope you have enjoyed my one shot! Please review and flames are welcomed!