The Melancholy of Kyon

By Diamond Avatar

Disclaimer: The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi / Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuutsu was not created nor is owned by me. The characters are not mine, and so on and so forth.

Okay, I'm probably digging my own grave by trying to start another fic while in the middle of school and ANOTHER fic, I wanted to make sure nobody else could get this story name. So uh… It's mine! Anyway, after finishing off the anime series, I decided it would be a good challenge to create a decent story that doesn't put the show to shame. Anyway, what this is actually going to be about, I have no real idea, but I intend to make it seem like it could actually be a part of the original show itself. I have no clue how I'm going to make comedy out of a show like this though. Maybe I'm just being full of myself, but screw it, let's just get on with this. As usual, reviews are appreciated, and pointing out errors would prove useful.

And people reading my Naruto fic, please don't hate me for this! I'm only releasing this chapter to get the title, but I'm still working on the next chapter! Please wait for it!

Chapter 1

The day after that rainy evening with Haruhi, I found myself walking to school as usual. I'd almost swear life was back to normal now… Or maybe I was just starting to feel that the weird stuff occurring now was normal… But isn't it weird to think that the weird stuff is normal…?

You know what, screw it.

As I entered my classroom, I saw Haruhi at her desk, glancing outside as usual. I set my bag onto my desk and took my seat, stretching my arms up. A sudden uncomfortable pressure began to build along my collar, and I was suddenly jerked back and my head was held onto this loud girl's desk. Luckily, I was beginning to expect it now. Oh God, I really was starting to find this weird stuff to be normal.


She looked at me with an upside-down frowning face.


She kept looking at me with that frown.

"Hurry up, what is it? This isn't the most comfortable position, you know."

Haruhi seemed to look troubled, which was kind of weird, seeing as how Haruhi was never troubled. Before she could continue though, our teacher came in, and Haruhi quickly mumbled 'forget it' before letting me go and gave me a forceful push forward. She didn't have to be so rough…

The recess bell tolled, and Haruhi was once again out of sight. She probably felt bored again and was running around looking for something fun. Kunikida and Taniguchi approached me with menacing grins.

"Hey Kyon, rumors say that you were sharing an umbrella with Haruhi the other day," Kunikida told me with a teasing grin. Taniguchi wasn't saying anything; his face just had a look that was a cross between envy and anger.

"I didn't have an umbrella, so we shared one. Besides, it was the school's umbrella. It's fine for a student to use it, isn't it?" Crap, I sounded just like Haruhi. "How did you find out about that, anyway?"

"Like I said, rumors." He stretched his arms outwards. "Everyone's hearing about it. Haruhi was already a celebrity, and you were getting known to be one of her men. Except now, you're being called her man."

That sounded so wrong to my ears.

"So how close are you two anyway? You gone out on a date yet?"

No, but I've had to go city-scouting alone with her before…

"Have you kissed her?"

Well, yeah, but I didn't have a choice. She would've destroyed the world. I really wanted to forget about that.

Before I knew it, just about everyone in class was looking in my direction. There were even people peering in from the corridors. How could people have found out that we walked together last night? And why was everyone so amazed? Okay, so it involved Haruhi, but wasn't I told that she's gone out with plenty of guys before?

Before I could stupidly question myself any further, the bell rang again, forcing them to give up their interrogation on me. As the crowd began diminishing with strong reluctance, Haruhi came in through the door, still carrying that same troubled look she had before. She ignored me as she took her seat, letting her head sit on her arms and looking straight ahead. From the looks everyone else was giving me, they probably thought she was gazing lovingly into my back.

Haruhi? Gazing lovingly? That'll be the day.

As class ended, I made my way to the clubroom seemingly instinctively. I guess after six months, I couldn't help but go there. That, and I'd get to see the stunning Asahina in her maid outfit. I knocked on the door, and Asahina, dressed in her lovely maid outfit, answered as usual, but she was strangely sullen. As I entered, I noticed that Koizumi and Yuki were already there as per normal, but Haruhi had yet to arrive. It seemed that whoever gave me that second cardigan was going to remain a mystery now. I sure hoped it wasn't Koizumi.

Asahina brought me some of her wonderful tea, and looked at me expectantly.

"It's good, Asahina."

She sighed happily, but her sullenness returned quickly. "Kyon-kun… Ano… I heard you walked home with Haruhi-san last night… Is that true?"

What was with this 'walking home' thing? Why was it such a big deal? "I didn't have an umbrella, so I shared Haruhi's one." Except it wasn't really hers. "It's no big deal."

I could've sworn Yuki looked up at me, but then again, she never really moved her eyes away from whatever book she was reading. I must have imagined it.

"Hey, hey, hey!"

The voice was approaching from outside, and grew louder by the moment. It could only be one person.

"Big news everyone!"

The door flung open, and there stood the usual pumped-up Haruhi, fired up over something once again. This would probably end up bad for me.

"Asakura Ryoko's back!"

My head shot up, and I turned to Yuki. She didn't stop reading, and just said "No problem". A person that tried to kill me is back, and she's saying it's no problem?

"Ne, Kyon! Let's go investigate! Isn't it strange for her to disappear with a story like her father working at Canada, and then to suddenly return like this? Something's fishy! I wanna investigate!"

Before I could say no, I found myself being dragged out of the classroom, Koizumi waving at me with a smile and Asahina looking worried. As the clubroom disappeared from sight, I found myself outside in the field, where a large group had gathered. I deduced that Asakura was at the center of that group. Haruhi dropped me to the ground, and I sluggishly stood up, rubbing my backside.

"Why did you leave so suddenly?"

"Are you back for good now?"

"How is it in Canada?"

A flurry of questions was being thrown at Asakura, and whether or not she responded I couldn't really hear. As her eyes waved around flutteringly, they met with mine, and she smiled. The last time I saw that smile I had a knife millimeters from my face. So you could understand my fear when she suddenly moved the crowd aside to step in front of me.

"Kyon-kun…?" She said it as though she wasn't entirely sure of whether or not she was right.

"W-Why are you back here, Asakura-san?" I stuttered, my hands shaking slightly from the past memories.

"I left my father in Canada and returned because I fell in love while I was last here," she began, announcing it to everyone calmly. Everyone 'ooh'-ed and 'ah'-ed dramatically, pushing forward to hear everything she said. A lot of guys were getting hopeful looks on their faces. It sounded kind of weird that she'd come back for something like that, but things were just about to get a lot weirder.

"I came back for you, Kyon. I found that I couldn't forget about you. Will you be my boyfriend?"

There were probably all kinds of outcomes to this. So somebody please tell me, why couldn't I see a good one? Maybe it had something to do with the looks of rage I was receiving from male and female alike. Even Haruhi was looking at me with a death stare.

Right about now, I sure was feeling melancholic.