Title: Taking a Stand
Timeline: 3 years ago
Summary: Gojyo is in the fight of his life.
A/n: I have a potty mouth.
Gojyo was a ladies man. There were no ifs, ands, or buts about it. He liked the ladies and the ladies liked him. He knew his bachelor's lifestyle might not last forever. That one day, time and paternal instincts would kick him and he'd want to father a litter. He'd thought about it once or twice and come to the conclusion that the bachelor's life wouldn't last forever. Even when he knew he'd still be a raging stud come middle age or whatever came after that, he still might settle down and be with one girl and not have his bushel full or one night stands anymore.
He knew he'd settle down one day, but one day was supposed to be in the far, very far, distant, really fucking hazy future. A future in which he might have some kids with some pretty girl who didn't annoy him, or bring up his past, and was good in the sack.
It grilled the hell out of him that his hazy future was clearing itself up on its own, all inconsiderate like and without his fucking permission, and going on ahead and giving him all sorts of crazy ideas about what his future should be like.
Hakkai had really messed him up.
He thought it'd be good for him to have another roommate. He thought it'd be just like those shitfest days with Banri. Impersonal and fun, clowning around with another guy that could hold his own in a fight and drink all your beer when you weren't looking. A real prick Banri was, yeah, but the fucker was all shits and giggles in his own distracting way and Gojyo enjoyed that.
To have another person around made him feel less lonely, less pensive. It made him feel less of the pain that was always trying to kick him in the balls.
Hakkai was supposed to be clowning around with him, and drinking all his beer, and kicking him in the face. Hakkai was supposed to be cussing him out, and stealing his girlfriends behind his back, and throwing his shit everywhere.
Hakkai was making him dinner.
Fuck him in the eye.
Gojyo should have known it was a bad idea. From the get-go his instincts should have warned him about somebody being so nice to him. It should have told him to shove --well maybe not shove, but gently nudge Hakkai out of his apartment when the brunette had been all stitched up and more emotionally stable.
They could have parted ways right then and there, and Gojyo's future with his missis wouldn't have been jeopardized.
He could have been boning girls left and right and not thinking about what Hakkai made for dinner, or what books Hakkai might read, or looking up a word in the dictionary that he had no idea what it meant, other than the fact that Hakkai had used it in a sentence to describe him, and it was driving him nuts that he didn't know, and he really wanted to know what Hakkai thought about him.
It was shit like that, that had keyed him into how dangerous Hakkai was to his current lifestyle. It was precisely the reason why he should have kicked--gently nudged him out of his apartment, or at least told Hakkai to maybe treat him more like an adult and not baby him so much.
He should have told him to quit cooking him for him, to stop buying shirts that fit better than the crap he picked up. He should have told him to stop making his apartment so clean, or to stop listening when he came back stoned drunk from the bar and felt like an asshole and wanted to unload.
It wasn't fair. He could be a dick to every guy he'd come across, and yet he couldn't be mean to Hakkai. It fucking wasn't fair. He tried once, really tried, like got a nasty comment ready and everything, and then it died a horrible death in his throat when Hakkai smiled at him and asked him if he wanted to play some cards.
He'd kick and yell in his head that this wasn't how he should be acting with a guy. With Tonpu he punched him every other week and then drunk his beer and took his money when he was unconscious, with Goku he cuffed and teased until they were both black and blue, with Sanzo he yelled and made his dislike for the bastard generally known.
With Hakkai he couldn't even say something without feeling like an ungodly jackass. He watched his words and tipped-toed, like a goddamned frilly ballerina around sensitive topics that took the shape of dead sisters or the whole humanity-losing shebang -- but when he did insert foot in mouth he always wanted to apologize and was already practically on his knees by the time Hakkai came home.
Hakkai had messed up his whole life plan of marrying a nice girl, knocking her up and raising the kids to not be bastards. Completely skewered that dream and flushed the shreds down the toilet, and it wasn't like he could just go up to his best friend and ask for an apology either.
Something along the lines of 'you turned me gay, so you better fix me up' or 'I think you need to apologize for being so hot' or 'stop smelling so good' or 'stop trying to listen to my problems and give me sensible feedback'.
Gojyo knew when to give up on a losing battle, but dammit his pride as a man, and a ladies man as that was giving everything it had. This was the fight of his life; he couldn't just roll over like some sated pup that got its tummy (stomach, manly stomach) rubbed.
Gojyo was strong. He kicked people's teeth in on a daily basis and guys that were a whole lot bigger and testosterone-fused than him.
He could fight this.
"Sorry I was late. Today everyone thought it would be a good idea to put their hands up at the same time right when the bell rang and question me about my personal life. Children their age can be such a handful, but I enjoy their enthusiasm for…Gojyo? Is something wrong? You look pale."
Unconditional surrender, like a brigade turned one man army, waving his white flag and everything, and prostrating himself towards the enemy ranks, begging and pleading for mercy and for his worthless life to be spared.
"Hey Hakkai, you wanna go for a drink or something?"