Title: Reality Rips

Author: Alive And Dangerous

Rating: Will change during the story, probably never lower than PG-13, though

Fandom: Harry Potter, Discworld and probably a lot more already thinks of some CSI scenes

Pairing: Loads and they'll probably change or else be disagreed with.

Summary: There's a tear in reality causing crossover madness just about everywhere

Spoilers: Probably a lot of things.

Disclaimer: I just own the general madness, specific madness and other stuff belongs to other people who probably know who they are. No money made here.

Reviews: I love getting reviews! And suggestions! Any idea you have can find its way into the story! So leave one, I might even write faster thanks to it!

AN: This bit is just the start, so it isn't as long as I think most of the chapters I'm going to write. But a start can't go on until the end… can it?

The 10 Million Years Prologue

"Qwarfgl?"¹ one of the Beings questioned. "Brahlk Accha!"² one of the others assured him. This sounded reasonable enough. And, wading through space towards a hole in the fabric, was the great turtle A'Tuin, supporting on its back four giant elephants which in turn supported the Discworld.

He bumped his nose.

¹ "Are you sure this won't go arfgl³ on us?"

² "Of course I am, there'll never be beings dumb or intelligent enough to both say the right phrase AND pull it."

³ Something nasty we no longer have a word for, but can be associated with general inside-outness

The 10 Days Prologue

"Come on, George! Pull the other one, it's got bells on!" Fred Weasley encouraged his twin brother. "Okay, ready or not, here it goes!" George grinned before pulling the finger sticking out of the box with bells on it.

Molecules split and multiplied in a wild frenzy, the very atoms of everything shuddered and an immense rip appeared in the very fabric of reality. George shrugged.

"Must be broken." He tossed the box aside.


"Potter! Why are you staring at me like that!" Snape demanded, trying to escape the emerald gaze that radiated… well, it radiated lust.

"Must be the Snarry-shippers, sir," Hermione replied. Harry himself clearly wasn't in any state to do so on account of him drooling and finally noticing how beautiful those dark eyes were and how Snape's hair probably was just extra shiny and silky, not at all greasy. In other circumstances, the Boy Who Lived would have been terrified of his own thoughts.

"Snarry?" It was probably the first time anyone had seen Severus clueless. Several Hufflepuf students were hiding under their desk because of it, quite convinced the world would end any minute now. "Shippers? Her… er.. miss Granger, what are you talking about!"

"Well, Sev… er… professor, there appears to have been a spell of some sorts that made a significant tear in the fabric of reality, leaving gates to some other dimensions wide open. All kinds of realms are beyond that tear and slipping through even at this moment, including the realm of…" Hermione looked around with shifty eyes. "Fanfiction!" Here, narrative casualty stepped in with some thunder, shortly followed my even more thunder as a vampire – known to some as Otto – ran through the dungeons yelling "CASTLE!" over and over again, each time followed by some triumphant laughter. Severus carefully chose to ignore this.

"Fanfiction?" He inquired, instinctively waiting for thunder, but apparently his tone of voice – known to some as utter bafflement – didn't have the same narrative authority as Hermio… Granger's.

"Well, it's like this… in some world, we're characters of fiction while characters of fiction here are real there. There are fans who next to the author write stories about us, called fanfiction. In it, they usually let things happen which they think should happen in the actual books or movies or whatever, which usually includes certain… couples. The reason Harry is currently attempting to crawl under your desk," at this point Hermione shot a baleful glance towards her friend on the floor, who didn't even notice, "is that he's under the influence of 'Snarry' fanfiction of the slash, that means homosexual, kind. It stands for Snape and Harry, you see?"

Severus risked a slow nod while discreetly shoving away the Golden Boy from underneath his desk with his left foot. "And you know al this because…?" he ventured. "Internet," Hermione answered in the kind of tone that usually – in this universe – is reserved for the word 'blue' after the question 'what colour is the sky?'. Snape didn't let the silence stay too long, just in case it didn't belong there.

"Of course."