Disclaimer: I am a poor college student. I barely own anything let alone a tv show. I wish I did though.
So fans, I am still working on my Season 3 one. Worked on it today, and will probably have an update by Wednesday or Thursday depending on my work schedule. However, I got this idea in my head. Actually I have 2 ideas in my head. But this one might be a one shot. I don't know yet. The other idea definitely isn't. So I'm writing the short (probably won't be short at all) one shot now. And I'm rambling. So I'm going to stop rambling and start writing.
Meredith looked at her watch as she climbed on the elevator. Finn was expecting her home, she was already running late, which always seemed to annoy him. She yawned. She was tired. She wanted to go home, where she wouldn't see him. Where she could watch tv with Finn and pretend that everything was perfect.
Meredith Grey sighed. She had gotten too damn good at pretending as of late.
It had been a year. A year since everything changed. Denny had died. Izzie had quit the program. George and her had come to an understanding. Cristina had morphed into a human. She had slept with McDreamy.
The elevator doors never got a chance to close.
He walked on, Sidekick in hand. Their eyes met briefly and quickly dropped back to the ground.
Derek Shepherd sighed. He hated pretending to ignore her.
But pretending was all they had done for the past year, after she had walked away with Finn. They weren't pretending to be friends anymore. Most of the time they weren't even pretending to be coworkers. They were pretending the other didn't exist. That there was nothing there, no feelings, or anything. For the past year it was as if the past between them had never happened. Derek was just an attending, and Meredith was just a resident.
So they stood on the elevator, in silence. Both looking down at the ground refusing to acknowledge the fact the other was live.
The lights flickered.
Both looked up, avoiding each other's eyes, as they tried to figure out what had gone wrong.
The elevator loudly grinds to a halt.
"Shit," Meredith muttered under her breath.
Derek smiled and leaned over and hit a few buttons, hoping something would happen. Nothing did. He hit the emergency button, expecting the alarm to sound. Nothing happened.
The elevator was broken.
"Looks like you're stuck with me." It was the first friendly thing he had said to her in a year.
"Wonderful," Meredith said, sinking to the floor and burying her head in her hands.
"No need to be so enthusiastic about it." Derek slid down beside her.
The two sat in silence for a few minutes, that slowly ticked by. They both stared straight ahead, unwilling to break the silence that had surrounded them since prom night. They looked like reflections of each other. Legs crossed, leaning against the back of the elevator, looking tired and annoyed. With a sadness in their eyes that had nothing to do with being stuck.
"I hear you and the vet are living together now." Derek quietly said. He didn't like feeling uncomfortable around Meredith. He needed to say something.
Meredith just scoffed.
"We should talk, pass the time." Derek offered as explanation.
"What makes you think I'd want to talk to you?"
Derek sadly shrugged his shoulders. "We need to do something. We might be here for hours. I can't sit in silence for hours. I thought we could talk."
Meredith doesn't respond and silence falls between them for a few more minutes.
"Yeah, Finn and I are living together."
"That's good. You're happy?" Derek asks, praying she says yes. And yet wanting her to say no.
Meredith just shrugs in response. She can't make herself lie.
Silence falls again.
"How are things with you? Addison?" Meredith asks, bridging the gab this time.
"The divorce finally got finalized last week."
"Oh, that's good."
"Hmm." Derek says and nods. After a moment he asks, "How's everyone, your friends."
"Good. Izzie is a pediatrician now, she loves working with the children. George and Callie are thinking of getting their own place. And Alex is still trying to woo Izzie, it's funny. Cristina, well she's Cristina."
"Burke's thinking of proposing."
"Seriously?" Meredith asks, looking at Derek. Meeting his eyes for the first time in too long. She sees the sadness.
He sees hers. "Seriously."
Another lapse in conversation.
"My mom seems to be responding well to the meds. Thanks for getting her in that program." Meredith says.
"I'm glad I could help." Derek says, nodding.
This time the silence lasts longer, both unsure of what to say.
A good ten minutes has passed before Derek talks again. "How did we get here?" he asks, throwing his head back against the wall.
"Meredith." It's the first time he's addressed her by her first name since prom night. "We shouldn't be this awkward around each other. It's not us."
"I know," Meredith says and sighs.
"I'm sorry. I never meant for us to get to this point. First with the hidden wife, and then choosing her. Calling you a whore, which I never even meant. And after you left with Finn, I was so hurt. I just, I couldn't talk to you. So here we are."
"Here we are." Meredith said.
They sit in silence for a few more minutes.
"I miss you," Meredith says so quietly Derek almost doesn't here her.
But he does. "I miss you too."
Their hands find each others in the middle, and their fingers intertwine. Both of them sadly smile, it finally feels right again.
"I'm sorry too." Meredith says.
Derek laughs. "What the hell do you have to be sorry for?"
"For not talking to you. I know you weren't talking to me but I could have tried. I should have tried. I'm sorry I didn't. I was confused. But I never meant to go a year without really saying a word to you."
"No, it's not." Meredith pauses, wiping a tear away from her cheek. "We need each other, don't we?"
Derek nods, his eyes filled with tears. "Yeah, I think we do."
Meredith and Derek sit there, in silence for a minute, holding hands and letting tears that had been held back for a year fall freely.
"So Finn, do you love him?" Derek asks sounding choked up.
Meredith looks down at their hands, and contemplated lying. But it's Derek. She can't. "I don't know."
Derek smiles. "I think I've heard that before."
"Than you know how I feel."
"Confused. Scared. Alone. Pretty much like shit."
"Yeah, that seems to nail it."
"Do you want me to tell you its good you're trying?"
"No. It's not good. He deserves better."
"So do you."
Meredith laughs. It sounds bitter. "We've made a mess of things, haven't we, Derek?"
Derek smiles at the sound of his name on Meredith's lips. "We have."
"It's about damn time we fix it."
"Hmmm." Meredith's heart trips at that sound. So Derek. It had been so long since she had heard it.
They find silence again, this time more comfortable with it. Holding hands and smiling through watery eyes.
"So I was thinking of getting a new dog," Derek says.
Meredith smiles and giggles, genuine this time. "I like dogs."
"So I seem to remember." Derek pauses and takes a breath, nervous about what he's going to say next. "I was thinking, maybe you could meet me on the trail in the mornings, walk him with me."
Meredith pauses and thinks, of Finn at home waiting for her and contemplates saying no. But then she thinks of the forced smiles of the past year, and the genuine one on her face now. "Yeah, I think I'd like that."
"Good." Derek says, contemplating kissing her. "How is it that we haven't talked in a year, and yet I still feel for you what I did that first night at Joe's."
Meredith shrugs. "Fate?"
"Fate," Derek says and nods.
Suddenly the lights flicker back on and the elevator begins to move again. The two stand up and gaze at each other, still holding hands. They finally reach the floor they were going to and the doors slide open.
Meredith lets her hand drop. "I should go. Finn's waiting for me."
"Yeah," Derek says and nods, looking sad again.
"Let me know about the dog. I really. I mean. I want to do this walk thing. Be friends again."
"Friends?" Derek asks and raises and eyebrow.
"Maybe more. We'll see."
Derek smiles and nods, and gestures to the door. "Finn's waiting."
"I should go."
"You should go."
Meredith smiles and turns away and begins to walk towards the exit.
"Meredith?" Derek calls out. Meredith turns around, wondering what he could want. "I love you."
Meredith feels a real smile spread across her mouth. It feels good. In that moment she knows what she has to do. She still has a room at her old place she can sleep in.
"I love you too."
Derek smiles at her, one of his dreamy ones, and watches as she turns around and walks out the door.
So yeah, there it is.
I don't want to say much about this one. It's just there. For some reason I feel no need to analyze it to death. All I want to say it the "I love you" at the end may seem out of the blue, but I wanted to end it on a happier note, show that things had changed and where it was going to end up going. They've been keeping things bottled up and now that they're talking, it's all pouring out.
I'm sure you all know my drill by now . . .read, love, review.
And sorry if I made anyone cry. This wasn't meant to be that emotional, just a cute elevator scene. At first I planned fighting and talking. But this is the way it played out. And it's "personal and dramatic". So yeah. It was sad to write, sorry if it was sad to read. But you got a happy ending.