A/N : This is my first "Bones" fanfiction, written during nights spent at hospital taking care of a loved one.Since nights at a hospital do get quite boring (specially since the one you're taking care of passes out 32 seconds after you drop by) and local TV listings leave a lot to be desired ("I'll take "Rerun Hell" for 200, Alex"), I've started bringing my faithful laptop with me to keep myself busy and at least pretend to be catching up on work.
This is how I came across 3 amazing revelations. First, there IS a limit to the amount of solitaires you can play without reaching a suicidal level. Second, some muses simply don't take "no" for an answer, regardless of what real life is dealing you at the time. And third, it's virtually impossible to write a masterpiece based on carefully planned internet research when you don't have internet access to begin with.
Having said that, I'll have to admit that this was originally meant to be a 7-parter, with each chapter named after a chakra and loads and loads of fact and science tidbits thrown left, right and center. All of that, of course, was a carefully plotted excuse to get B&B to perform the human pretzel, tantric style, without coming across as a sex fiend.
Alas, no such luck.
So we'll pretend we got ourselves a free ride in the Angelator (Ms. Montenegro was very accommodating once she found out what I wanted it for) and we'll skip all the mumbo jumbo and get down to the very basics: Booth and Brennan working undercover as a married couple and behaving... uhh.. well... as a married couple?
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The story so far:
- Booth managed to talk Brennan into accepting the assignment and still was able to tell the tale.
- They're now officially Mr. and Mrs. Steven and Tessa Brethen, who've been married for 5 years and have lost a bit of yester's spark in bed, so, on one of Steven's coworker's recommendation, they decided to give the seminar a try.
- Upon arrival, they met Michael Dez, enlightenment teacher, who soon diagnosed "unresolved issues and emotional distance" within the couple and suggested a couple of "cleansing therapies" both individually and as a couple. At the beginning, neither of them can complain, cause, who in their right mind opposes being pampered with massages and oils and relaxing music? (cricket sounds in the background) Hmm… thought so.
- Problems begin when they take their first therapy with Dez himself, whose intimate and detailed questioning has both of them stammering responses and faltering in their story-lines. Booth is certain they've blown their covers and wants to pull themselves out of the operative. Brennan, on the other hand, after having listened to the masseuses gossiping about a missing girl and a new "mummified statuette" arriving, wants them to go on. For the unobservant onlooker, it looks as a normal fight between a married couple, but Michael Dez is starting to wonder what's really going on in the Brethen's lives and decides to take a closer look at their intimacy.
- That night, Booth and Brennan are invited to a private session in Dez's chambers , and Booth gets an "up-close-and-personal" initiation with yoga and tantric sex, and he doesn't' have to put on an act to portray a not-so-flexible, slowly-but-surely-getting-there almost-middle-aged pencil-pusher. He blames lack of exercise on the fact that he couldn't hold the poses, but, truth to be told, he's afraid he won't be able to control the way his body is reacting to having Brennan so close and in such an intimate situation. Still, they both can feel Dez's suspicions as they leave the session to go into their room.
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I had never felt so tired in my entire life. I've got muscles aching that I didn't even know they could ache. Or that they even existed, to begin with. I steal a glance towards Bones and I can tell she looks fresh as a cucumber. I try telling myself that it's all that estrogen flowing that makes her more flexible than I am, but deep inside I know it's the martial arts and the yoga which are responsible for it. Guess pumping iron and running track don't cut it quite as well.
I'm still bothered by the way Dez looks at us. I know he suspects something is going on, but I'm certain he's yet to figure out exactly what it is. I cant' wait to get into "our" bedroom so we can talk freely about the whole case. And then drop dead for at least 6 hours. Or drop dead first and talk later. The way I'm feeling, I really wouldn't mind if we chose the latter over the former.
As soon as I open the door I get the feeling something's not quite right. All my senses are running on high trying to pinpoint what's happening. Brennan walks towards the bed and lifts a piece of parchment left on top of one of the pillows.
"Look, babe, Dr. Dez was kind enough to leave us a note"
I can tell by the sarcasm dripping from her voice that she's not exactly keeping in character. I come closer and warn her to keep quiet with a slight gesture of my hand.
"Why don't you go brush your teeth while I read what he has to tell us" I tell her as I give her behind a light slap to get her going. By the look in her eyes I know I'm so going to pay for this once the case is over, but it was worth it.
I read the note and feel the hairs at the back of my neck slightly raised. As nonchalantly as possible I gaze around the room. It doesn't' take long to discover a couple of cameras hidden in the tapestries and the corner fan. And I'm pretty sure the bed's headrest is bugged as well. Dez, you sneaky perv I think to myself.
I walk into the bathroom where Bones is busy removing her makeup and brushing her teeth. I make a whole production out of taking off my t-shirt and the wife beater underneath it, but to no avail; if there are more cameras inside the bathroom I can't find them.
Bones raises an inquiring eyebrow at my actions, and luckily for me, her mouth is filled with toothpaste foam and is not able to ask the question I can see in her eyes. I move swiftly behind her and my arms surround her waist.
I start nipping at her right ear. "Cameras" I whisper in between nibbles, "And mikes" I add as I pretend to kiss my way down her neck. She closes her eyes and I feel, not hear, a single word coming from her. I look up at the mirror just in time to catch the perfectly formed "Fuck" I get as an answer.
Illogically, irrationally, that single action ignites my desire. Maybe it's having had to spend so much time so close to her. Maybe it's the certainty that, no matter what I do, she'd have to let me get away with it in order not to blow our covers. Maybe it's the amount of unresolved sexual tension that's grown between us. Maybe I'm just plain horny.
Or maybe it's just the idea of having to perform sexually with Bones whilst Michael Dez and God knows who else is watching that I find such a huge turn on.
I feel (hear?) her swallow hard and stiffen a bit, as if sensing a change in my demeanor. "What did Dr. Dez want, babe?" She looks at me through our reflection in the mirror and her eyes widen as she feels my erection press against her lower back.
"The"… kiss… "good doctor"… nibble… "says that"… nip… "although it's against regular protocol" … lick… "he thinks in our case"… slight suction… "it'd be beneficial for us"… hands moving up to cup her breasts… "to have sex tonight" …
I hold my breath as I wait for her to either moan or kick my ass into next Friday.
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