Of cheating and Ice Cream
Just a short little fic-let I had looming in my head for awhile and I decided to write it down. I hope you guys enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.
Disclaimer- Do not own X-men in any way shape or form; it all belongs to Marvel
Lying in her bed in the middle of the night was 18 year old Marie D'Acanto, wide awake and weeping in tears.
Marie was never one to really cry. Ever since she came to the institute, Logan had taught her to deal with her emotions in a different way; without the sobbing. But ironically enough, he was the reason for her tears.
Ever since Rogue laid eyes on her knight in shining claws, she was in love with him. Ok maybe the actual first time she laid eyes on him in the cage, it was just lust but, when she got to know him better in the RV, then she realized she loved him.
Logan seemed like the only person in the universe who wanted to give her the world and in turn protect her from the bad people in it. He did everything for her, from offering her his only snack and a place to stay in that rickety old RV he resided in, to saving her live from Magneto.
He was always the guy who offered her a shoulder to lean on or a friend to chat with, even when he wasn't in the best of moods; Logan always made time for her.
That's how she knew she was in love with him.
But then Jean came along.
It always appeared to be that when Dr. Grey was around them, that Logan had a completely different spin of his emotions. It was like Rogue didn't even exist when the lustrous red-head was around and she'd resort back to 'kid' or 'squirt' instead of Marie or darlin' like he normally called her.
The thing was, although Logan may have cared for Rogue in a very loyal and loving way, Jean had always had the upper hand on poor Rogue. For Jean was a woman.
Rogue was only a mere girl and the Wolverine apparently had no interest for girls. He wanted a full, luscious and hardy woman, aka, Jean Grey. And although Dr. Grey may have been already taken and promised to another man, that didn't stop the two from casually flirting.
Casual flirting that only led to the silent anger of Rogue and Jean's fiancé, Scott. Although Rogue had idolized Jean for being the strong courageous woman that she was, she couldn't help but envy the fact that she had so many men chasing after her.
There was Logan who couldn't wait to get his hands on her, and there was Scott who was constantly attempting to tear her attention away from Logan and back to him. Then there was just about every other boy in that school who were all dying to sneak a peak at the Dr. in compromising moments like in her Pj's or in her bikini while lounging at the pool.
Rouge always wondered why she didn't have any men chasing after her? Sure there was Bobby who made the attempt but clearly gave up when he decided to be with Kitty in the end instead of her. Rogue had to admit that at first, it had hurt when she caught Bobby cheating on her with her best friend but eventually she came to realize the truth.
Guys didn't like her because they were scared of her.
Let's face it; Rogue was untouchable. Some of the kids actually called her that behind her back because indeed it was the truth. She couldn't touch. And that's probably the reason Bobby cheated on her and went crawling to Kitty. He was not only scared of her but he was frustrated with the fact that he couldn't love her in the way he wanted to. So he did what any other man would do in said situation; leave her for someone else.
And yes that had hurt Rogue to. But after being taught by the almighty Wolverine, she didn't weep over it; she decided to act against it.
She went to the professor and begged him to train her to control her powers. She swore that she would sit with him every afternoon or all night even to do whatever it took to control her powers and be normal. She not only wanted to prove to the world that she was nothing to be afraid of, but she also wanted to prove to Logan, that she could be just as big a woman as Jean was.
She could take a new step, start a new brave, courageous and rigorous journey just like Jean does and prove that she is no longer a silly little girl; but woman. A strong woman who was not to be feared but lusted after, and maybe then she could grab Logan's attention.
And so she did. Days weeks and months passed and Rogue sat with the professor day, by day, every afternoon after school and before dinner to try and control her gifted curse. There were times when it was frustrating, and there were times when she wanted to give up but she didn't. The drive and pursuit wouldn't allow her to. So she continued to try.
And finally she succeeded. Rogue couldn't be happier and she couldn't have picked a better day. It was a Saturday, her eighteenth birthday to be exact and that's the day she finally conquered her task.
It felt great, no more than great to do what she had set out to do and accomplish it and more importantly start a new chapter in her life. No longer where people going to have to accommodate themselves to touch her, no longer was she going to have to wear scarves and gloves in the middle of summer, no longer was she nor anyone else going to have to be afraid to kiss her, hug her or shake her hand. She could touch! Her skin was no longer a deadly weapon unless she wanted it too.
Rogue felt marvelous she felt more that marvelous; this was completely outstanding. She couldn't wait to share it with the world.
She leapt out of her chair and hugged the professor, thanking him for working with her and not giving up on her. It brought her to tears that the man was so generous and he helped her achieve her long term goal.
He smiled and assured her that he was more than glad to be of assistance and was just as excited as she was that she was able to gain control over her skin.
Rogue smiled once more, leaping out of the office to ponder who she should tell first. Bobby? Jubilee, Kitty, Storm?
But then it hit her. She remembered why she did this in the first place. Not only for her own benefit and her own good but, for the love of her life; Logan.
And that's exactly who she'd tell first; Logan. She was going to prove to him that she was no longer a silly little girl who need protecting but a strong and new woman who was ready for the world and ready for love.
With that said, Rogue practically sprang down the halls of the mansion and towards Logan's room where she knew he would be at this hour of the evening.
She was probably smiling as wide as she ever has in her lifetime as she was beyond excited to share with him this new chapter in her chronicles.
Daydreams floated to her mind of what could possibly happen in the situation and things like, confessing undying love and spending the rest of their lives together reared their pretty little heads.
She was on cloud nine for this was her day and absolutely nothing could bring her down.
Or at least that's what she thought.
For when Rogue finally arrived at her beloved Wolverine's door, she was in for a big surprise.
She finally floated her way to his suit, stepping off her cloud for a moment to share her good news with her all time crush.
Rogue stood in front of the door fixing her blouse (possibly trying to look a little sexy) and fixing her hair, taking in a deep breath before she knocked.
This was it, this was the big moment. The realization, the womanhood, the confessions of love, this was when she was going to get her man.
Raising her fist to tap on the heavy Oakwood door Rogue's hands stopped mid-knock when she heard a strange noise coming from inside.
Her first reaction was to panic at the thought of Logan being in danger but it didn't sound like he was in trouble, there wasn't enough shuffling going on for him to be in trouble.
She pressed her ear to the door to get a better listen only to wish soon after that she didn't.
Coming from inside was a steady thumping noise, followed by a consistent pattern of grunts and 'oh God's' accompanied by moans and cries of pleasure.
It didn't take a rocket scientist to know who's voices they where and what those voices were doing. No doubt that the grunts were coming from Logan because indeed it was his room and he was probably the only man in the mansion who grunted but the moans……………….
Well if it wasn't Rogue in there moaning then there was only one other person it could be; Dr. Jean Grey.
Rogue felt her heart drop to her knees and tears immediately flooded her soft eyes.
Her emotion went from excited to heartbreaking in a matter of two seconds which must have been a new all time record. She couldn't believe this was happening to her. After all her hard work, after all her determination and her drive, this is how she was repaid?
She stood frozen in her spot, still overcome with shock and left there to drown in her tears while and still hear the sounds emitting from inside.
She had to get out of there. She had to get away from this area and fast. Rogue turned around to take off down the hallway possibly quicker then she came.
Just as she was going to take off, she spotted Scott down the hall, looking at her with a tear stained red face and a look of pity as he felt the pain that she was going through.
"Rogue………." Was all he managed to say before she fled in the other direction.
And that's what led her to where she is now. In her room, in her bed, crying her little eyes out. She didn't care about Wolverine and his teachings on "not crying", she didn't care that she was probably waking her roommates Kitty and Jubilee, and she didn't care that it was her birthday and she didn't meet Ororo and the professor in the kitchen to sing over her birthday cake.
This was possibly the worst birthday of her life. How could Logan do this to her? How could he betray her like this? What did she do to deserve it?
She just didn't understand Logan sometimes. She thought she did but she didn't; she just didn't get him. She thought he liked her, so she flirted with him. She thought he wanted a woman, so she tried to be one.
She didn't know why she was making all the efforts here and he still wound up screwing the brains out of that damned Dr. What did he want from her? What would it take for him to notice her?
Rogue sighed to herself, wiping the tears from her eyes and sitting up in her bed. She glanced over at Kitty who was stirring a little in her sleep, most likely from Rogue's crying and sniffles. And although she wanted nothing more than to be in her room right now and cry her eyes dry, she had to have a little respect for her roommates and therefore decided the kitchen might be a better place.
It was late on a Saturday night and hopefully nobody would be there.
Marie wondered just how many times she was going to be wrong today.
She went into the kitchen and flicked on the lights to find Scott in there, sitting in the middle of the island, staring at the coffee in front of him. Not drinking it, but just staring at it; staring at it mindlessly like it was hypnotic coffee.
Rogue felt a pang in her heart as she watched him watch his coffee and a feeling of pity washed over her. Here she was, blubbering like a baby at the loss of someone she didn't even have when there was someone else who truly lost his lover.
Scott was engaged to be married to Jean and along came Logan with his metal claws and drop dead sex-appeal, stealing Scott's poor Jean away from him. The whole mansion knew of Jean and Logan's "flirting" and the whole mansion knew of Scott's futile attempts to steer Jean's attention back towards himself.
But it was fatal attraction.
After the outcome today, it was obvious who Jean chose in the end and poor Scott must be heartbroken.
"Well that makes to of us" Rogue thought as she entered the kitchen and walked straight to the fridge, opening it up to see what comfort foods were inside.
As soon as she opened the door and looking inside; a rather purple birthday cake was staring back at her; candles still in place and completely untouched. She sighed. Storm must have gone through great lengths to make her the cake (seeing as she was the only one who could bake) and she didn't even make a quick appearance for her happy birthday song. Not only was she on a roll for being wrong today, she was on a roll for being rude as well.
Closing the fridge and now opening the freezer, Rogue spotted a big container of Ben and Harry's (A/N: lol Ben and Harry's, it's my knock off of the real thing) vanilla swirl ice cream sitting on the top shelf and her eyes beamed. That was it; that was the perfect comfort food.
She grabbed the tub from the top shelf and closed the freezer door with her foot, snatching a spoon from a near by drawer and popping open the top. Dipping the spoon into the tub and pulling out a bit, she stuck the frozen goodness into her mouth and savored the vanilla taste for awhile before swallowing.
Looking up from her moment of heaven, she caught sight of Scott who was still staring at his coffee and that feeling of pity washed over her again. He was probably in more emotional pain than she was and she was being selfish right now. Maybe he needed comfort too; possibly a little Ben and Harry's?
"Want some?" was all she said pushing the tub in between them so it was in his reach as well.
Finally looking away from his coffee to acknowledge her, Scott let a small sad smile grace his lips and he softly declined. "No thank you Rogue" he said.
She wondered how he managed to even put on a fake smile at this point. He had just lost the one he loved to his arch enemy today and he was forcing emotions on to his face. Rogue always wondered why Scott always had to act like he wasn't hurting inside even though everyone knew, deep down he was. She figured it was because he was oh fearless leader of the X-men and he wanted to prove to the others that he was solid as a rock but, it was ok to cry sometimes. It doesn't make him any lesser of a man.
"You know Mistah' Summahs, it's ok to cry sometimes." Rogue announced. "I know you're sad and its ok, I won't tell anyone. No one is here" she said.
Scott chuckled a little at her choice for attempt at conversation. Is that what she thought? That he was afraid to cry? He wasn't Logan; Scott wasn't afraid to let the whole world know what was on his mind. "I'm not scared to cry Rogue" he said with another small chuckle.
"Oh" she said, sticking another spoon of ice cream into her mouth. "Sorry. You know I kind of just assumed afta' this evening with well……….ya know………that you would…………."
"Ya I know" Scott interrupted. "It's ok" he said.
There was a brief pause in the room before Rogue started speaking again. "Mistah Summah's?"
"I'm sorry" she said plain and simple. "It shouldn't have happened." She elaborated.
"Ya I know but………." Scott sighed. "I can't say that I didn't see it coming."
Rogue quirked her eyebrow. Couldn't see it coming? Was this the talk of oh fearless one? Was Scott giving in? "What do you mean?"
"I mean that the whole mansion saw what was going on between Jean and Logan. Hell even a blind man could see it. And me, well I was too blind sighted by my hatred for Logan and too stubborn to see what was going on right under my nose. I knew what was going to happen but I was too much in denial to believe it."
"But that doesn't mean that she had to……………."
"I know Rogue. Jean was just as wrong for doing so, but I guess in the end it was just fatal attraction. It's hard to admit but, Logan just has something that I don't. Something that Jean is looking for"
Rogue shook her head in disagreement. This couldn't be Scott; this had to be some sort of evil and sick joke. Scott never threw in the towel like this; ever. So why the sudden change? Especially when it came to something like the love of his life? Shouldn't he be angry? Shouldn't he be beating Logan to a pulp and then forgiving Jean to build their relationship over? What had happened to him?
"Mistah Summahs this is just the depression talking, this isn't really you. I know you; you don't give up as easy as this" Rogue said.
"I'm afraid I'll have to today Rogue. Jean had made it clear in her actions today who she really wants to be with. I know it's a hard thing to grasp but, I'm just going to have to grow accustomed to it."
"Aren't ya going ta' fight for her?"
"I'm done fighting Rogue, it's time to throw in the towel; she's made it clear who she wants to be with and she picked Logan. I just have to let it be."
"This isn't you Mistah Summahs" Rogue repeated. "Ya neva' give up."
"I know but as they say, there's a first for everything"
"But don't ya love her?"
Scott sighed. He didn't know why he was spilling his guts out to a sleepless teenager, maybe because there was no one around, or maybe because she was willing to listen. But whatever it was, it felt good to tell it to someone.
"To be honest with you Rogue, I'm not sure me and Jean loved each other in the way we should have"
Rogue's eyebrows furrowed in a very Logan like manor. "What do ya mean?"
"I mean that, the both of us were to caught up in the perfect relationship and the perfect wedding and the perfect life that we kind of lost track of what was really important" Scott explained.
"Love" rogue finished.
"Exactly" he said. "We had this big ol' plan mapped out of when we would get married and when we would have children and when we would retire and things like that and it just got a little crazy. We were so fixed on trying to make everything perfect that in the end, we sort of just steered away from each other. To be honest me and Jean, really don't have a lot of things in common."
"Really?" Rogue asked. "I thought you two were two peas in a pod"
Scott chuckled a little. "Not really. There are a bunch of things that I love and Jean hates but I put them aside so we could have the perfect relationship together. I just wanted us to lead a happy life but I guess in the end it just wound up, tearing us apart."
"I'm sorry to hear that Mistah Summahs"
"Ya, I'm sorry that it took until this evening for me to realize it." He said.
Rogue looked down at her ice cream as a small pause dropped in between them. "Well hey, what am I blubbering about?" Scott asked. "I think you were the one who really lost someone tonight." He said. "I'm sorry about Logan"
Rogue sighed. "Ya I'm sorry to. This is probably the worst birthday of ma life." Rogue pondered this for a minute before adding, "No, that year when Billy Hopkins from the forth grade pushed me in a 3 foot mud puddle was my worst birthday, this is the second."
Scott chuckled a little.
"And you know, to think I tried everything to get his attention and nothing worked." She said looking at her ice cream in shame.
"Well you know, I'm sure you had Logan's attention just…………………"
"Ya don't have to try and make me feel betta' Mistah Summahs, I can admit the truth too."
Scott nodded. "Rogue, you shouldn't try and change yourself just to please others. You need to allow people to adore you for just being you."
"I know but…………..when it comes to Logan……………I don't know I just wanted to make ma self perfect you know? I mean afta' Bobby left me for Kitty, I kind of thought that nobody wanted me. People were scared of me because of ma powers and I thought if I could get Logan to notice me then I felt like I was proving something to ma self."
"People aren't scared of you."
"Yes they are. Don't ya see the way they avoid me in the halls, or how I'm the last one to be picked for teams or for group projects. Ever since that accident with me and Logan before liberty island, people have been treatn' me different. They're scared of me Mistah' Summahs"
"I'm not scared of you" Scott said plain as day and Rogue smiled a bit, shoving a bit more ice cream into her mouth.
"Ya well, it doesn't matter anymore if people are scared of me or not."
"What do you mean it doesn't matter anymore? You're not leaving are you?"
"No I'm not leaving" she said, briefly noting the sound of concern in his voice. "I can touch now."
If Rogue could see Scott's eyes she would have seen them go wide with amazement when she said her last statement. But she pretty much got the gist of his astonishment when she saw his mouth fall agape.
"Really?" he asked completely astounded. "When did you……………."
"I finally got the hang of it this evening. I've been having daily sessions with the professa' n' he's been teachn' me how to control ma' power. I finally mastered it this evening and it felt great."
Scott smiled. "That's wonderful Rogue"
"Well ya' I thought so too, up until now" she said.
"What are you talking about? I thought this is what you always wanted."
"Ya but………………..Mistah Summahs, rememba' a couple months ago when we read that book in class n' you were teachn' us about wantin' things for the wrong reasons but none of us understood?"
"Ya, I remember that. I think that was probably the longest lesson I ever taught" he said with a chuckle.
"Ya well, I think I finally understood what that meant. I mean I thought that if I were to work hard and control my power that some how it would make me more of a woman and Logan would notice me." She explained. "But now I realize that, I wanted it all for the wrong reasons. I mean sure I wanted it for me, and I wanted to touch but ma' focus and ma drive were off. I was concentrated more on doing it for someone else rather than myself."
"And?" Scott asked, trying to push more answers out of her. Although she had already graduated a month ago, it was still nice to teach an important life lesson.
"And……….."she began, her eyes welling up with tears. "And he didn't even notice." She chocked out, letting her tears fall freely. "I mean I feel like all ma hard work had gone down the drain because he didn't even take the time to notice me Mistah Summahs. He didn't acknowledge me or anything and he didn't even say happy birthday. Now I feel like I would have been better off with ma stupid mutation in the first place!" she said, dropping her spoon and weeping all over again.
Scott felt his heart melt when she said those words to him. Poor, poor, Rogue. He could understand her dilemma because he knew exactly what it was like trying to win the attention of someone who wasn't interested but, Rogue was just a teenager, her heart was still fragile. And it must have been rough to come to face the harsh realities of the world of love at such a young age.
"Hey, hey…………." Scott said getting up from his spot at the table to embrace her in a hug. "Come here, everything is going to be ok" he comforted, wrapping his arms around her as she pressed her head to his chest and cried.
So this is what a hug felt like. It's been so long and she couldn't remember the last time she had been in someone's embrace. The thoughts of controlling herself for the wrong reasons faded away and a warm fuzzy and soft feeling washed over her; the feeling of a hug. It felt great; no better than great, it felt awesome and she suddenly remembered why she wanted this so badly. Before Logan became her love, before he took her in and before the institute. She remembered now; she wanted to hug again. To kiss again, to shake someone's hand. She didn't want to have to touch someone and they'd wind up in a coma like her first boyfriend. She wanted real physical contact and she got it.
"Shh, shh, it's going to be ok Marie" Scott whispered to her.
He had said her real name. No one had ever said her real name before; no one but Logan who she assumed was the only one that wasn't afraid of her.
But Scott, Scott had proved something different for her tonight. He proved that he did care about her, and he wasn't scared of her. Weather she had control or not. He listened to her when she talked (something Logan hardly did) and he held her when she cried. (again something Logan didn't do). Scott was something Logan was not and something she couldn't figure why Jean had left; Scott was a real man.
And it took her until just now to realize this. It took her until just now to realize what a real man was.
A real man was a fearless leader, a real man was strong confident and witty, a real man wasn't afraid to cry and wasn't afraid to be in tune with his emotions. A real man was willing to do anything for the one he loved even if it was at his own expense. A real man wasn't afraid to adhere to the truth. A real man was Scott.
Rogue stopped crying and looked up at the ruby quartz shades that held Scott's eyes behind them. Even though she couldn't see his hazel orbs, she could feel him looking down at her as well and she smiled a bit, wrapping her arms around him as well to complete the embrace.
She studied his facial features and until this moment Rogue didn't think she'd ever realized how handsome Scott was. The perfect side swept hair, chiseled cheek bones that fell into a strong chin which dawned a five o'clock shadow, luscious lips and tinted shades that held mysterious eyes behind them. Yes Scott was quite a looker so why was it that Jean had let him go?
"Mistah Summ………..Scott" she whispered to him but she was silenced by his lips pressing against hers. His soft luscious lips against her own and for once, there wasn't the unusual pull of a life force that she normally felt. Just a sweet and good natured kiss. And what a kisser at that!
A few moments later both lips parted and Rogue stood there, still in Scott's arms, speechless as can be, while Scott placed a small smirk on his recently kissed lips and looked into Rogue's eyes.
"Happy Birthday Marie" was all he said.