Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha, or make any money from writing fan fiction.

A/N: finally a new chapter!(The edited version of this story is on Dokuga) I am very sorry it took so long, but I got good news! I've have some of my health issues resolved. That alone will make writing a bit easier. I haven't abandoned any of my stories; I just need to go back over them one by one.

Anyway, all of your suggestions are very appreciated… and I'll try to use as many of them as I can the new chapters. Thanks for all of encouraging reviews…

Male Bonding 101: Children's Songs and Pennie Play

As the oddly mixed band of heroes continued their pilgrimage, Kagome couldn't help but sneak small glances at Sesshomaru and Inuyasha. It had been weeks since the dress-up disaster, and it was easy to tell that both demons were still wary of her every action. Kagome smiled. The whole situation was still quite funny.

"Kagome-chan, what direction are we going to take today?" asked Rin.

Kagome shrugged her shoulders. "I really can't say. I haven't felt the pull of a shard in a while." She closed her eyes in concentration and then opened them again. "I'd say either south or east. It could just be Koga's shards I'm feeling, but it still won't hurt to make sure."

"We could just ask Lord Sesshomaru to see if he can smell Koga-san near by." Rin suggested. She wanted to be helpful.

"Feh…" Inuyasha dropped down from the tree he was resting in and headed towards Sesshomaru's brat and Kagome. "You don't need a sensitive nose to find that loser. The smell of raw wolf ass is all over the place; even a human should be able to smell it." He proclaimed as he approached the girls.

"…." The hum of insects could he heard through the thick silence of the group. Finally a lecherous grin appeared on Miroku's face. Inuyasha left himself wide open for this, and Miroku decided to take the opportunity since nobody else would. "Really Inuyasha?"

"Hell yeah!" came Inuyasha's quick reply. "It's a smell I'll never forget, despite trying!"

"Hmm…" Miroku stood from his seated position beside Sango, to stand BEHIND Kagome. "That's peculiar. I've heard that dogs never forget some scents, yet they would need to have intimate contact with the source. Tell me, Inuyasha, how far up Koga's ass have you been?"

"Not far enough…."

Jaws dropped, gasps were heard, and girlish giggles rang throughout the clearing where the travelers' camp resided.

As usual, Inuyasha was way off topic and hadn't been listening to a word Miroku said. However, when reasoning finally caught up to the hanyou; he reacted immediately.

"SIT!!"

Inuyasha plummeted to the ground. "Kagome, why?" he moaned.

"Why do you think, stupid? Didn't you see me and Rin standing right here before you started to lunge?"

"…."

"And since 'wolf ass', as you kindly put it, is so thick in the air; I think we'll head east. There may not be any shards, but we might run into Koga and he may have some leads."

The conversation dropped and everyone, but Sesshomaru, went about their task of cleaning up camp.

Sesshomaru slyly, made his way over to the hole known as Inuyasha and looked down. It was hard to fight the smirk trying to make its way across his lips. "Worry not, little brother. I'm sure the wolf prince will be more than happy to indulge you with another sniff." He slowly walked away with the sound of a soft laughter following.

ssss

Humming, Kagome dug through her bag for something new to wear. She wanted something cool, yet fantasy like to wear. What she found was a pair of gym shorts and a sports bra. Though not made for everyday use; they would due on this hot day. Plus she needed go home soon.

.

Sesshomaru watched Kagome don her ridiculous clothing, this particular outfit being worse than that monstrosity she called a school uniform. These 'shorts' hung from her hips tempting him to reach out and have one touch. Still, Sesshomaru was anything but disgusted. He could even feel his groin tighten as he watched the gentle swagger of her ass while she walked.

By nature, Sesshomaru was patient but he knew he had a limit. He was just unaware of what that limit was until today.

He could do nothing but watch as his fine tuned control slipped, and over a simple child's song. O' how the mighty have fallen.

'You put your left arm in, you take your left arm out, and you put your left arm in and shake it all about.'

'You put your tail in, you take your tail out, and you put your tail in and shake it all about. '

They were laughing, dancing, and singing to a slightly modified version of the children's song 'The Hokie Pokie' with the Shippo and Rin, when Kagome was suddenly tackled and held down.

Kagome panicked and tried to wiggle free, but stopped when he felt someone's hard-on pressed firmly between her covered ass cheeks. "Get off."

"I suggest you stop moving priestess, before I put something up your tail." Sesshomaru whispered in Kagome's ear. "I'm tired of waiting. I'll have my way with you soon."

Needless to say, Kagome quickly accepted Sango's offered kimono; especially after Sesshomaru tossed her another predatory smile.

ssss

On the fifth day of their travel eastward, our shard hunters ran into a most unwanted visitor.

"Kikyo!" Naturally Inuyasha would be the first to announce the presents of his beloved, but today that wasn't quite the case. He meant to yell 'Kikyo, duck, move out of the way!!', but those words never made out of his mouth.

As Kagome watched the disaster unfold in hi-def slow motion, she could have sworn that the scene before her eyes came straight from a Saturday night boxing match…

'Contenders having their gloves lased up in their corners. Next, the bell rings. Finally, the contenders square off; and the fight ends with a quick TKO! '

At least that is what Kagome envisioned in her mind. In reality, Kikyo walked into the middle of camp like she owned it. Sango, still angry about the last fight, wasn't having it. Sango was about to storm up to the whore and give her what for, when she remembered the 'training gloves' Kagome bought. Sango distinctly remembered Kagome saying that the gloves would allow her to dish out maximum punishment with little damage to no damage to her hands. At that moment the smile on Sango's face put Sesshomaru's look of death to shame.

It shouldn't have come as such a shock, but the moment of impact completely caught Kikyo off guard. She couldn't see anything aside from the stars dancing in her vision. Inuyasha was calling out to her, but answering him was completely out of the question.

"Damn it, Sango, what tha hell is wrong with you!!" asked a furious Inuyasha.

Kagome, rendered speechless, looked on in total awe. Shippo and Rin, who flanked Kagome on both sides, were just as speechless.

Jaken did his best to ignore the whole situation, while Sesshomaru stared at Kagome and the children.

Miroku and Kohaku were trying their best to keep Sango at bay; when the situation took another sudden turn….

"Damn, I thought I just saw a soul float by…" Koga leaned down to take a closer look at the cracks on Kikyo's face. "You better plaster your bitch up fast, mutt. If you don't she may not be here by morning."

Inuyasha scowled at Koga before grabbing Kikyo and taking off into the woods.

Koga looked at all the stunned faces around camp and shrugged. "What?!"

..

Inuyasha couldn't believe Sango! But he couldn't do much about the current situation.

After reaching a point that deemed safe, Inuyasha stopped and laid Kikyo on the

ground.

He paced for a moment and then turned his attention to his beloved Kikyo. The cracks on her face looked something terrible. Koga may have been right.

Inuyasha sniffed the air and cursed. In his time malady, he always seems to travel away from water.

Why did he need water?

Well, according to Inuyasha's reasoning, Kikyo IS made of bones and grave yard soil and MAYBE a little water. So all she would need to be fixed right up would be a bit of mud; and presto! Inuyasha failed to realize that Kikyo could and would heal herself once she became conscious again.

Instead of approaching the problem with a level head, Inuyasha panicked. With no water he couldn't patch Kikyo up, so thinking quickly Inuyasha did the only thing he could do. He peed in the dirt.

When Kikyo woke up sometime later, she wouldn't shack a nasty feeling that had suddenly come over her. It wouldn't have been so bad had the smell of urine not been right under her nose, almost as if it was coming from her body. Looking around, Kikyo focused her eyes on Inuyasha. "Inuyasha, where are we?"

"I took you away from camp and brought you here." Looking and feeling somewhat guilty, Inuyasha watched as Kikyo touched her face. "Don't worry about that Kikyo, I patched you up myself!"

"INUYASHA!"

…..

It was far from surprising when Inuyasha never returned back to camp that night or the next day. On the third day Kagome had enough of waiting. "Well, we should pack up."

Shippo looked confused. "What about Inuyasha?"

Kagome smiled and passed Shippo a juice. "Don't worry about him, Shippo. He's a half-demon. I'm sure he will be able to find us just fine."

Sesshomaru sat at the back of camp quietly plotting and listening to the miko. She was right, but wrong as well. Inuyasha had returned some time ago, but never entered camp. The boy was just sulking. As the object of his desire walked up to his side, Sesshomaru couldn't help the smirk forming on his lips. "Tell me priestess, where are we headed today?"

"The well…"

ssss

Kagome hadn't noticed till now, but camp was way too quiet. After the Kikyo sighting they all decided on a small break before starting their trek back to the well. Still, even for it to be a leisurely day it was just too quiet. Closing her book, Kagome took a look around camp; there were no males in sight. Even Shippo and Kohaku were missing.

Peculiar…. Kagome was ready to explain the disappearances away with foul play, but that idea didn't seem to check out. They were still within to Sesshomaru's boarders, and Naraku didn't operate in these parts.

So where did they all go?

Sighing, Kagome got to her feet and started to search.

….

"Come on flee bag, either put up or shut up!" Inuyasha shouted.

Koga, not to be out done, laid his 'bet' out for inspection. "I did tell you not to feel ashamed, right dog breath!" He threw a smug look over his shoulder to Inuyasha. "I got all Kagome needs and more."

At the mention of Kagome's name Sesshomaru decided that he needed to get involved. Standing from his seated position at the base of a tree, Sesshomaru beckoned Jaken to his side. "Jaken, watch the kit and the human." Calmly but swiftly, he made his way over to Inuyasha and Koga. Sesshomaru stood in front of the two and demanded to know what was going on. "What drivel are you two spewing now?"

Inuyasha blushed and glanced down. "This ain't got nothing to do with assholes, so get lost Sesshomaru."

Following inu-baka's line of sight, Sesshomaru sighed. "Really, Inuyasha? How can the two of you have a test of masculinity when all the males present are not yet participating?" He turned to Miroku. "Monk, you will be the judge of this 'test'."

…..

After wondering through the area for a few short minutes, Kagome came across a clearing with all of her camps missing males. However something struck her as odd.

Shippo, Kohaku, and Jaken were speaking amongst themselves. That didn't happen often, but didn't raise any alarms. Miroku looked ready to sprint from the clearing; his uneasiness put Kagome on guard. Further inspection of the area, Kagome noticed her missing demon companions. Inuyasha, Koga, Sesshomaru, Ginta, and Hakkaku were all facing opposite of one another messing with something in their respective laps.

Curiosity demanded that Kagome step inside the temporary camp and find out what they were up to. However, Kagome knew better. Should she stop them now, she would never find out. So Kagome sat quietly.

…..

There was not much in the world that Miroku hasn't seen or participated in, this contest is where he drew the line. Men and their bodily hang-up's, certainly wasn't one of Miroku's concerns. "Look, I don't want to sound rude, but can we hurry this up? I'm Sure Sango and Rin-chan will be returned from town soon, and Kagome should be finished with her nightly reading."

"Yeah, yeah. We hear ya, monk." Koga shouted from his position.

Inuyasha's arm temporarily stopped moving as he looked over his shoulder to Miroku. "Just how are you going to decide the contest?"

Agitated, Miroku sighed again and held up six strips of cut cloth; all the same length. "See, Inuyasha. Now please hurry up."

"Fine, I'm ready." Inuyasha replied.

With similar sounds of approval from the other contestants, Miroku felt it safe to begin. "Alright men, turn around and take your strings."

…..

From her position, Kagome almost fell over. That action would have been far more acceptable than the one her body chose. Instead of staying hidden, Kagome rose from her position and walk into the clearing and right over to the source of her wowed attention.

Hell, who could blame her…. In front of Kagome lay the largest penis display that she's ever had the pleasure or displeasure of seeing.

First, there was Inuyasha; he was average in Kagome opinion. He was nothing spectacular but not horrible; very normal. Too bad he's been fucking a dead woman though; she may have given him a chance.

Ginta and Hakkaku were next. Kagome would have separated the two, but together they only had one dick between them. Maybe their size was enough for a wolf woman, but Kagome felt like a pre-teen adolescent would have a better chance of bringing an average woman to orgasm.

Sesshomaru was third. He was not as large as Kagome envisioned him to be; though he was far larger than his baka brother. She really couldn't find anything to complain about. However, Sesshomaru possessed some HUGE ugly balls; immediately she pictured old furry, wrinkly elbows or nasty sagging knees. Silently Kagome wondered how that would all work out if she were to give his a chance. His balls were a slight turnoff and she couldn't imagine how they would feel in the throws of whatever passion Sesshomaru had planned.

Koga was last. Kagome shook her head. The points were not adding up in his favor. He already has hairy nipples and now this. Needless to say, Koga's male parts resembled that of a post op. transexual. All of those little cubs Koga always talked about having suddenly vanished from Kagome's mind. With a thing as tiny as his, she just didn't see it happening.

Kagome was just about to turn around when…. Hello…. Another entry caught her attention.

Without looking up, Kagome studied the maleness before her. It would have been perfect had it not been grotesquely large. The 'thing' looked like something out of a scifi-henti manga. Just the mere sight of it was a turn on!! Well, it had her turned on forget everyone else…

Suddenly Kagome remembered that there where only five human resembling demons in their entourage not six. Kagome quickly looked up and then promptly passed out. Her brain finally broke.

Before Kagome hit the ground, she heard Inuyasha yell "Totosai! What the HELL!"

H

H

Next time: At the suggestion of a reader Kagome will return home and get some new clothes. Hakudoshi makes an entrance.

If you have a different idea of who our beloved miko should meet or something to add just let me know. All ideas are welcome.