Title: What the Hell?

Summary: House puts his foot into his mouth this time.

Author: Mikesh

Part: 1
Warning: Mpreg for later chapters so if you don't like then please don't read.

Disclaimer: Don't own House but I wish I did.

AN: Ok I'm taking a shot at House mpreg so please be kind when you review. Also this takes place during season two. But it's an AU b/c I haven't seen season two.

AN2: There's probably going to be about 39 to forty chapters to this story so please hang in there with me.

AN3: I'll try to get House's character down but if I don't please don't get upset.

House had just arrived at the hospital on his motor cycle. He was running late by three minutes but that wasn't anything unusual for him.

"House you're late!" Cuddy screeched when she saw House getting off the elevator.

"So?" House asked still walking.

"House!" Cuddy screeched.

"What?" House asked finally turning around.

"You have clinic duty today. I want five hours out of you before you leave. Yes that means you may have to give up lunch today," Cuddy said smiling at him.

"Fine," House said walking off.

"And you're not getting one of them to do it either!" Cuddy screeched.

Instead of replying House walked on. He did give her a half wave in the air but that was all.

Once he entered his office he noticed that Allison and Robert were sitting on his couch. Robert was rubbing Allison's feet.

"What's wrong with you?" House asked setting down his helmet on his desk.

"Well if you haven't noticed I'm six months pregnant with twins," Allison snapped.

"Snappy today. Keep your girl in line Chase," House said.

"Fuck off," Allison said not in the mood today.

She hadn't slept well at all last night. The twins had kept her up most of the night and she didn't need House's comments today.

Allison was pregnant with Robert Chase's babies. No they weren't married or dating. They had went to the fair together and ended up sleeping together. They still weren't dating but Chase was there for her as much as he could be. They had moved in together so that Chase could be with Allison if she needed him. Allison was happy that she hadn't gotten knocked up by Greg because he probably would have bailed on her right away.

"Touchy," House said.

"Why do you have to be such an ass to her?" Foreman asked.

"I'm not," House said.

"Yes you are," Robert said.

"Keep out little Brit boy," House said turning to look at Robert over his shoulder.

"I'm Australian," Chase said.

"Whatever," House said.

"See there you go again," Foreman said holding his hand out towards Chase.

"He's used to that. I do that all the time," House said.

"Ouch," Allison said scrunching up her face.

"What's wrong?" Robert asked concerned.

"Just our kids practicing soccer with my ribs," Allison said.

"Ok," Chase said taking a deep breath.

"Can't handle a little pain?" House asked.

"What the fuck is your problem today?" Foreman asked.

"Nothing. What's yours?" House asked.

"You know something I bet that if you were in her shoes you wouldn't last a day," Foreman said.

"I bet I could," House said.

"Want to make that a deal then?" Foreman asked.

"Deal. Here's the bet if I win you do two weeks of clinic duty for me," House said.

"No here's the bet. When I win you buy me dinner and a drink plus $500 upfront. If you win I'll do a week's worth of clinic duty. If you take it off though you loose same with me. If at the end of the day either of us has taken it off then it's a tie and neither owes the other one," Foreman said.

"I don't go that way," House said flutter his eye lashes at Foreman.

"You're gross man," Foreman said with a look of disgust on his face.

"Fine deal. And Wilson and Chase will be joining us," House said turning to Chase.

"No I didn't make the bet. I'm not doing it," Chase said.

"What don't think you can handle it?" House asked.

"Hey I have to watch Allison suffer through a pregnancy. And I have had to wear a pregnancy belly for one of our lamaz classes. I'm not going to waddle around the hospital like an idiot," Chase said.

"Are you trying to tell me I waddle like an idiot?" Cameron asked getting upset.

"Aww looks like you put your foot in it this time," House said leaning on his cane.

"Shut up! No I'm not saying that. I would look like an idiot if I was to do it. You don't look like an idiot. You're just as beautiful if not more so then the day I met you," Chase said.

"Nice try. Besides you only wore it for an hour at most before you all said it was too hard to do," Cameron said.

"Wimp," House said.

"Am not," Chase said.

"What if I throw in a pitcher of beer at the end of the day?" House asked.

"Nope," Chase said.

"I'll take you to Hooters," House said.

"Nope," Chase said.

"Fine all the beer you can drink along with one hundred bucks," House said.

"Fine I'll do it," Chase said.

"I should have stopped at Hooters," House said.

"Too damn now," Chase said.

"What's going on in here?" Wilson asked coming into House's office.

"We're just making a little bet on you," House said.

"What about?" Wilson asked.

"What'll take to get you pregnant," House said.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Wilson asked raising an eyebrow.

"House and I have a bet going. He was being a dick to Allison so now he and I both have to wear pregnancy bellies for a day. When I win he buys me dinner and a drink plus 500 upfront. If he wins I do a week worth of clinic duty and he too gets 500. He now wants you and Chase to join in the fun," Foreman said.

"It's not happening. I had to go through a pregnancy with my ex wife. I don't want to know what she went though," Wilson said taking a seat.

"Oh come on it'll be fun. We'll be the four pregnant Musketeers," House said smiling at Wilson.

"No," Wilson said.

"Free beer," House said.

"You couldn't get me to do it for 600 dollars," Wilson said.

"Free beer and 1,000 if you loose you don't owe me anything," House said.

"2,000 and it's a deal," Wilson said.

"Deal," House said sticking out his hand.

"Deal," Wilson said not really wanting to but knowing what House would do if he didn't. So Wilson shook House's hand.

"Wait you guys need some ground rules as to why you can take off the pregnancy belly," Allison said.

"Yeah like to go to the bathroom," House said.

"No. Like if you have to go to surgery then you can. Otherwise you have to leave it on," Allison said.

"Why should we be able to when you can't?" Wilson said.

"Because you guys can't tell them you can't because of pregnancy. I however can," Allison said.

"Ok," Wilson said.

"If Allison or one of the others sees you take it off for any other reason then surgery then you loose the bet," Robert said.

"Deal," Wilson and Foreman said.

"House?" Wilson asked.

"Deal," House said and with that all four guys shook on it.

Little did the other three know House planned to hide in the clinic all day so that he could take off the pregnancy belly but still win. Little did House know though that all of them were going to gain up on him.

Later that day it was decided that since today was Friday they would do it Monday.

Please Review! Good? Bad?

NEXT CHAPTER: Allison puts her plan into action