It's a dead evening. The sun is barely showing a glimpse of light off in the distance of the harbor and only a thin, pale stream makes it through the half pulled curtain. Raven continues to stare at the breaking waves while Starfire comes into the room.
"Raven? Please, Raven. I only want to know what's bothering you."
Raven gets up from her solemn chair and walks to the window with her back facing Starfire.
"Star," she chokes up for a minute, "you couldn't possibly help me. I just want it all to go away."
She doesn't move an inch from where she's standing except for a single tear crashing down her pale cheek just like those mirrored waves down below.
I wonder if I could jump from this window. Would Star be able to catch me before I hit the rocks? No. She wouldn't be expecting a thing.
"Please, Raven. Come sit down here with me so I can learn what is plaguing you so. If I cannot help then at least I could comfort you in your grief,"
She's moving closer
Sister! No, no. Don't call me that of all things! I'm either gonna break down, here in front of the only person who's ever cared of my well being, or I'm going to jump out of this window. But if she manages to catch me, I cannot take the risk of her calling me her demented sister. Aw hell.
"Star. I don't deserve to be called your sister. I don't even deserve to live here anymore after what I've done. If you must know what's happened, then fine, but you can't tell anyone what you've heard. Although you'll never want to see me once you know. And more importantly, you will never trust me again, as it should be."
"Oh, please be certain that I shall not say anything! Please tell me, I will always care about you Raven. …. As it is Raven you know I care for you much more than I ever could my own family, but after yesterday you ran off so quickly that I'm beginning to think that you do not wish to be around me. I am sorry if I have done something to lose your trust…."
Raven just stared wholly shocked into Starfire's face.
After a few awkward seconds, "Star, there is no way in hell that you could ever lose my trust. I'm just not able to think clearly right now. I did something very wrong…"
"Then please tell me what it is that bothers you?" Star blurted very relieved it was not she.
In Raven's room two days ago
"Oh God. Oh God!" Stop! What the hell are you doing?
A soft moan rumbles through her now coarse throat.
I can't stop "Oh God…." I want to but I can't
A VERY loud and longing moan fluctuates in time with the rattling of a shadow-engulfed lamp.
The lamp shatters when Raven screams into the dark of her room, sweaty and exhausted."It feels way too good," she thought out loud and collapsed on the bed in heaving short breaths.
It keeps getting better and better. But how can I even look at myself!
She can't help but to let loose a disgruntled groan. "I can't keep this a secret for long. Someone IS going to hear…"
What will I do then?
Staring, mouth agape at the wall, the realization of a new piercing idea… no urge, now hitting her fully.
HOW DID THAT THOUGHT EVEN GET IN MY HEAD!
"No, I can't…..can I? NO!"
"Stop it Raven before your demonic side gets the best of you," Knowledge saying swiftly in her mind. I could never do that to her. But she's so beautiful….NO, NO, NO! Stop it Raven! STOP IT NOW!
A deep sigh escapes her open mouth. What the hell am I going to do?
Knock! Knock! Kno-
"Just a minute Star." In Raven's surprisingly still deadpan voice.
Shit! Where's my clothes! SHIT!
"Raven? I was wondering if you would like to partake in watching a….chick flick, as I believe friend Beast Boy calls them?"
Shit, I can't find my robe… what the hell? SHIT, SHIT, SHIT! I BLEW UP MY UNDERWARE!
"Come on in, Star," Her voice lagging only slightly.
The electronic swoosh cracking the dark silence like a whip. "Friend Raven, may I sit and talk with you before we begin the watching of the 'chick flick'," Star's voice obviously troubled.
Raven only nodded, now dressed in only her leotard, minus her underwear. Her eyes were also slightly dilated and her deep violet hair strewn into knots and tangles, although in the lack of light none of this could be seen by Starfire.
I wonder what could be bothering her? Oh, no! Could she have heard me! God, I hope I wasn't that loud…
The nervous Tamaranian floated into a cross-legged position next to Raven on her bed.
Oh, Shit! I hope she can't smell anything, please let her be too distracted to notice!
Right then a leather bound book began shaking in the room's corner, although left unnoticed by Starfire.
"Raven, I wish to know the meaning of this Symbol on the case to the disc of watching," pointing to the capitalized 'R' on the bottom right of the DVD box.
"That's an 'R' standing for 'Rated'. It means the movie has scenes in it that most parents wouldn't like their kids to watch." Mentally sighing at it having nothing to do with her earlier compromising position. Then seeing the still worried complexion on Starfire's face, "But that's not what's bothering you is it Star?"
"No, friend Raven, it is not. Raven, as things are different here with Earth customs, I have been…been pondering on the details of some Earth relationships."
"Some? Well what exactly about it is bothering you? Are you trying to date someone?" With that said the book in the corner once again began to shake, only much more violently.
"Raven, on my home planet, people are very accepting of diverse relationships no matter the age, race, or…gender." Exactly one millisecond before Starfire said her last word the book promptly blew up.
Starfire jumped at the explosion and was now floating tightly in her arms in the middle of Raven's room, only a little shocked. "Star, are you asking whether or not it's okay to date other girls on Earth?" Raven managed to stutter under her breath.
"Yes, Raven, I am uncertain of the ways of the dating here and do not wish to portray a…taboo, I believe it is called, in my lack of knowledge when confronted on such a topic on the case that it should arise in conversation. But as I can see that this subject has become uncomfortable for you I shall depart. I am sorry for troubling you so friend Raven."
"People are usually some-what accepting of homosexual relationships, ones with two women… or two men." Raven blurted, her heart skipping a beat with each word and double-time for adding in "or two men" in mere seconds before it became obvious of what was on her mind.
"I am, very relieved you are not as startled as I had thought. Thank you for explaining friend Raven. Are you still wishing to partake in the watching of the 'chick flick'?" Starfire spoke, obviously trying to change the subject but also fearing that Raven was not open to her suggestive ideals.
Sensing her unease, Raven took a second to read her thoughts…"Dear Raven, I am afraid you will not be accepting to what I wish to ask you even more. I truly wonder what action you would take if you knew."
A look of shock wiped over Raven's face while five lights and a plant imploded up in the hall way. Feeling a little more willing but still just as, if not more, confused and wanting to clear the fog, "Star, who is it that you want to ask out?"
Starfire was suddenly taken aback, not even expecting the question to summit. She stared blankly out at nothing but air and replied, "Someone… who is… very dear to me, and closer to me than anyone on this planet. I try to spend as much time with them as possible but if they knew the true feelings I hold…I'm afraid that they would no longer even accept our friendship, nonetheless to want it to be more. I am sorry for bearing you with my problems friend Raven, I shall be waiting for you in the watching of the movie?" Star casually changed the subject once more as she was beginning towards the door.
"Yes, Star. I'll be right down to watch the movie." Raven replied calmly, contrasting the overwhelming speed of her heartbeats.
Starfire was sitting quietly on the large couch as the millions of previews began, of course with Starfire thinking they were part of the movie. Raven jutted in the room and floated languidly next to Star's seat, letting herself levitate slightly from the cushion.
"Hey Star, movie started yet?"
"Yes Raven! It is most magnificent indeed!", Star managed to spit out in desperate hyperactivity and concentration.
Star, now entrapped in the "movie", began leaning forward, as if it would in some way make the pictures jump from the screen. Raven was simply waiting for the movie to begin with her eyes softly shut, then started, allowing for a chair to be flung in a dark mass, when Star laid her hand on Raven's knee, gripping the joint tighter with each passing second.
"Um, Star?" Raven croaked.
"Yes Raven?" "You need to calm down, you're about to break my knee cap."
Seeing she had been gripping Raven's knee, she immediately let go and started apologizing, now oblivious to the just opening movie.
"I am so sorry friend Raven," She screamed while nearly suffocating Raven by being millimeters from her face. Raven just sat in shock of the ever-faster movements of Starfire who was grabbing various antiseptics and napkins, from the counter across the room and back to Raven, each pass getting uncomfortably more closer to Raven.
"Star stop. I'm fine." By this time (only seconds after Raven had told Starfire she was holding her knee) Starfire was nose to nose with Raven, actually nose-to-nose, forehead-to-forehead, knee-to-knee, thigh-to-thigh, and conspicuously lips to lips, only barely not being a kiss.
"Please have my up-most apologies friend Raven, are you sure you are stable?" Star asked out of concern for (seconds) earlier and for now seeing as Raven had a clear layer of sweat on her face not to mention the couch they were on being 4 feet off the ground.
Raven instantly regained her composure, replaced the couch to it's before position, and managed to squirm an inch away from Starfire, who only got an inch closer after doing so.
"I'm absolutely fine Star," and thinking quickly, "but you're missing the movie."
"Are you positive Raven, you're still sweating?" Star innocently shot out.
Raven held Starfire out about a foot by her shoulders and stated calmly, "I'm positive and we're missing the movie."
Satisfied, Starfire returned to her seat next to Raven and began to get entrapped in the movie again. Raven sat back and sighed inwardly, and tried to regain her heart rate to normal.