Things I'll Never Say

The song is by Avril Lavigne.Inspired by 4X18 The Road Home

First posted on Destined.

As usual I own nothing!

I'm tugging at my hair
I'm pulling at my clothes
I'm trying to keep my cool
I know it shows
I'm staring at my feet
My checks are turning red
I'm searching for the words inside my head

Samantha couldn't believe what she was seeing. Martin's apartment was a pigsty. She had never seen it like this. Then came the boiling point. After Martin handed her the glass of water she spotted a prescription in Gina Hill's name. She couldn't believe her eyes.

I'm feeling nervous
Trying to be so perfect
Cause I know you're worth it
You're worth it

For instant she felt nervous about confronting him about it. But he should have been off these months ago.

"What are these?" Samantha inquired.

Martin's expression confirmed her instincts.

"This is none of your business. It's time for you to go," Martin exclaimed.

"It's my business Martin when you steal pills from a victim's home," Samantha retorted.

"What do you want from me!" Martin exclaimed.

"Tell me how to help you!" Samantha pleaded with him.

"I don't know Sam," Martin replied.

Samantha hated seeing him so unlike how perfect he used to be. She would find him help. She would talk to Danny.

Samantha had wanted to tell Martin for ages that she loved him. However it would have to wait. He needed to get help and she would be by his side. Hopefully someday, she could admit her feelings.

If I could say what I want to say
I'd say I wanna blow you... away
Be with you every night
Am I squeezing you too tight
If I could say what I want to see
I want to see you go down
On one knee
Marry me today
Yes, I'm wishing my life away
With these things I'll never say

Samantha didn't know when the day would come but she hoped that when did, it would lead to them being together forever.