TITLE: A Little Bit of My Green Back
AUTHOR: Sugah Sugah
SUMMARY: Danny attempts to get his money back.
SPOILERS: General season 2
PAIRING: If you have to ask…seriously, I'm worried about you.
RATING: K+ - They're still behaving.
DISCLAIMER: Is my name Jerry Bruckheimer? Well…maybe it is. Except it's not. So they're not mine.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Sheesh, people. You can't just let things go, can you? Here we go, by popular demand, the follow-up to "Make Believe". This is the third in what I've decided to call my Elvis series. All of the titles will be based on Elvis songs. There are at least two more planned, possibly more, so don't get all huffy on me. :P They're coming, I promise.

Okay, Ashley? ;) No more yelling at me.


A Little Bit of My Green Back

Marriages in ten minutes or your money back.

That was the sign pinned behind the reception desk in the lobby of Elvis's Chapel O' Burnin' Love. Danny had spent a great deal of time staring at that sign before heading in there with Lindsay, so he knew exactly what it said. But apparently, the lady behind the desk disagreed.

Danny jabbed an angry finger at the sign. "That sign says marriages in ten minutes or your money back."

The lady nodded patiently, but her patience only fueled Danny's anger. "Yes, sir. I'm aware of what the sign says."

Danny nodded his head at Lindsay. "Our marriage took longer than ten minutes." Lindsay tightly gripped his arm, resting her head on his shoulder. She had tried to talk him out of this, but he was determined to get a little bit of his green back. The sign said so.

"Sir," the lady said, "the fact that your marriage lasted longer than ten minutes is through no fault of our own. The marriage ceremony is only supposed to last eight minutes. This is our job. We do this all the time. We know how long it lasts."

"What?" He slammed his left palm on the reception desk, where the thin band of gold was plainly visible on his ring finger. "That's ridiculous. It lasted longer than ten minutes."

"Danny," Lindsay said, tugging gently on his arm, "let's just go. It's not important."

"Sir," the lady said, "the ceremony itself only lasted eight minutes. However, Elvis had to start over because your wife suddenly decided to call the whole thing off."

Danny opened his mouth to protest but Lindsay laid her left hand on top of his and burrowed her face into his neck, and his protest died in his throat. He couldn't argue with that, since it was the truth. Elvis had just started the ceremony when Lindsay confessed to Danny that she didn't think she could go through with this. She said they shouldn't get married if it was just a joke. He'd told her that he hadn't proposed as a joke, even though he had, because he knew wanted to spend the rest of his life with her, and if she were willing to marry him tonight, then he wasn't about to wait. If he waited, he'd probably just screw up.

"And after you talked yourselves back into getting married," the lady said, "there was a rather lengthy kiss…"

Lindsay kissed the shell of Danny's ear, and he shivered. He remembered that kiss. Oh, he remembered that kiss. His and Lindsay's first. The sweetest, most erotic kiss he had ever had. His insides turned to water just thinking about it.

"…which eventually had to be broken up by Elvis…"

Lindsay chuckled softly in Danny's ear and lightly ran her fingers along the nape of his neck. He shivered again. Elvis had good-naturedly separated the two of them after their kiss started to get a little out of control. But Danny hadn't been able to help himself. He'd wanted to kiss Montana ever since that first moment at the zoo, and he was going to make it count.

"…and after Elvis restarted the ceremony, he had to stop and wait for the two of you to finish laughing at him…"

Danny snorted involuntarily, remembering the horrible accent that their fake Elvis had spoken in. Danny didn't think he'd ever heard a worse Elvis accent. The lady looked at him sharply, and he smiled apologetically. He felt Lindsay smile against his throat.

"…and you interrupted the vows so that you could break into a rousing rendition of 'Can't Help Falling in Love'…"

Lindsay slipped her warm fingers under the collar of his shirt, and she pressed a light kiss where his shoulder met his neck. He smiled. He'd never prided himself on his singing abilities, but Lindsay had certainly enjoyed when he got down on one knee and sang the only Elvis song he could think of at the moment. Besides, he thought his choice of song accurately described how he felt about Lindsay Monroe. She just breezed into his life and stormed around, messing everything up and not caring what it was doing to him, and he couldn't help but fall for her. He was gone the first time she looked at him.

"I love that song," she said into his ear.

The lady behind the desk gave them both a pained smile. "…and when it came time for the vows, I thought your wife was going to use up our supply of Kleenex…"

Lindsay's fingers had migrated south, tracing delicate patterns along the small of his back. Her touch caused goose bumps to appear everywhere on his body. He couldn't wait to get back to their hotel room.

"…and when Elvis pronounced you man and wife, that kiss lasted even longer than the first one…"

Lindsay's left hand still covered his, and she entwined their fingers. The fingers on her right hand slipped underneath the waistband of his jeans. Would this woman never shut up?

"…so really, when you think about it…"

Lindsay's right hand slid still lower. She exhaled lightly on the shell of his ear. Danny couldn't take it anymore.

"…it isn't the chapel's fault that your marriage took longer than ten minutes."

"You're right," he said. The lady behind the desk looked slightly surprised that he wasn't putting up more of a fight, but he just couldn't take it anymore. Not with Lindsay…touching him like that. He was about to burst, and they hadn't even made it back to their hotel room yet. "We'll just go, then."

He tightened his grip on Lindsay's left hand and pulled her roughly from the chapel.

When they were back on the sidewalk outside the chapel, Danny wrapped his arms around Lindsay's waist, picked her up, and spun her around. As soon as he put her down, her lips were on his, biting and sucking. She placed on hand on his chest and pushed him against the outside wall of the chapel.

"It's about time, Mr. Messer," Lindsay said against his lips. "I was beginning to think I was going to have to grab you in front of the receptionist."

He raised his eyebrows, intrigued. "Oh, really? I'm starting to wish you had, Mrs. Messer."

She laughed. He loved the sound of her laugh. She really had a beautiful laugh. "And why is that?"

"Because," he said, waggling his eyebrows, "then this would be justified." He bent down, grabbed her legs, and slung her over his shoulder.

"Danny!" She smacked him on the back as he started walking down the strip. "Danny, come on, this isn't funny."

"Oh, it's not a joke, Mrs. Messer," said Danny. "We are going back to our room now."

"You're going to carry me all the way there?"

"I've carried you before." He glanced at the buildings on either side of the street; nothing seemed familiar. He squinted at the nearest street sign and didn't recognize the name.

She thumped him on the back again. "Across a rooftop, Daniel. Not around Las Vegas."

He skimmed his fingers up the back of her thighs and smiled as she shivered against him. "Are you questioning my stamina?"

He stopped and looked around. Hanging out with the Vegas CSIs, he hadn't needed to pay attention to where he was going; they had known. Now, without them to lead him, and after having walked around trying to find a chapel, he had absolutely no idea where they were.

"Danny?" Lindsay asked, after they had been standing in one spot for a few minutes. "Everything all right?"

"Hey, Montana?"

She sighed loudly. "Yes, Danny?"

"Um…where are we?"