The three sacred rules
One-shot InuKag Against his better judgment, Inuyasha takes the advice of the perverted monk on how to 'woo' Kagome. Rule number one: Girls like sensitive guys.
"Have faith in me my friend. Just relax and remember everything that I've taught you. The journey will be a smooth one, I assure you."
"Are you sure about this monk?"
"Faith? How do you expect me to trust you when all you ever get is a slap on the face from Sango?!"
"Ahh, Sango, she.. is just shy." Miroku smiled wistfully.
"Yes, shy. I'm sure. How do I know you're not just trying to make a fool outta me, 'cause if I find out-,"
"Calm down Inuyasha. I am not trying to make a fool out of you. I'd much rather be spending this time with Sango, so I'd appreciate it if you gave me a bit more credit."
"Ah ah ah. Remember Inuyasha, rule number one: Girls like sensitive guys. Be more positive, more happy, and no more 'whatevers'"
"Wh-.. Fine! But this better work, or else.." Inuyasha left his sentence unfinished, but his message was loud and clear as his hand traveled dramatically to his Tetsusaiga.
"Yes yes," Miroku flicked his wrist, dismissing the threat, "Now remember Inuyasha.."
Miroku paused slightly for a more theatrical effect as the first signs of anxiety gradually became evident through Inuyasha's demeanor.
Feudal Japan was once again blessed with the warmth of a radiant spring morning as the peaceful village was gradually coming to life. Gentle noises of the forest animals was quickly being replaced by the growing laughter and conversations of the villagers, speaking to fellow neighbors about the interesting dinner of the night before. Children quickly formed their social groups before one by one, walking towards a far away fantasyland where their imaginative minds brought them a day's worth of adventure. With a gentle breeze sweeping through the town, everyone obliviously attended to their daily routine as a new day had just begun.
"Oh, can't we rest for just one more day Kagome?"
"Shippooo, I'd love to just rest too, but we've already postponed our journey for three days.. and frankly, I don't think Inuyasha's going to take it well if we asked him to look for those jewel shards another day." Kagome replied, looking genuinely apologetic as she placed the last of everything she needed into her oversized yellow backpack. "I'm sorry."
"I hate Inuyasha. He's such a big bully sometimes." Shippo half-heartedly whined, kicking a pebble out of his path with his hands stuffed grumpily in his pant pockets.
"Come on Shippo, everyone's waiting for us already." Kagome kindly hurried the moody fox demon whilst at the same time offering an optimistic smile in the hopes of brightening the Kitsune's mood.
"Oh but Kagome.." He stomped his left foot firmly on the ground for a more persuasive effect, and for a moment, looked just like a mini version of Inuyasha.
"Kagome? Is everything okay?" A female voice interrupted as three figures slowly approached the schoolgirl and Kitsune.
"Can't we just stay back for one more day? It's so sunny and my legs are still tired and-,"
Suddenly an unusually gentle male voice interrupted, "Look Shippo, we'll hurry it up today alright? If your legs are still tired, I can carry you if you want.. that is if Kagome doesn't mind." Inuyasha smiled and patted the fox demon's head.
Time seized to exist as the hanyou's companions momentarily stood paralyzed as shock invaded their senses. The gentle rustling of the trees surrounding them had suddenly amplified and if they really tried, they could even make out the conversations of gathered housewives a mile away.
And the silence stretched on.
"Alright everyone!" He clapped, "Let's get a move on!" And with that, he walked ahead.. with a bounce in his step?
"Come on guys!" He called back, overly happy, "Close your mouths and move those legs! Exercise people!" And before anyone was able to register what he had just said.. he started whistling his self-composed tune.
"Kami." Sango breathed, "It's finally happened.. we've actually driven Inuyasha insane." The demon exterminator could only stare at the back of Inuyasha, positively unsure of what to do.
Kagome and Shippo merely stood there, eyes larger than Inuyasha's ego. "Kagome?" Shippo whimpered and tugged lightly on the girl's sleeve, "I'm scared."
The raven haired beauty could only nod numbly, "Me too."
A smooth chuckle penetrated the tension in the air as Miroku casually waved off their conversation, "Oh come on ladies, I think you're overreacting just a little. In fact, I quite like this new Inuyasha.. don't you agree Kagome?"
Kagome gave him a confused look. 'Was it just me or did he just give me a really suggestive look?'
Inuyasha's laugh brought everyone, with the exception of Miroku, out of their daze, "Okay seriously guys," placing his hands on his hips and tilting his head to the left, "Do I need to carry each and every one of you? Come on! You don't want to waste such a glorious day now do you?" And with one dramatic sweep, his arm waved into the air, presenting the scenery to his companions.
Glorious? Since when did Inuyasha use words that were more than two syllables?
Intent on finding out the cause of this sudden change, Kagome hurriedly walked towards Inuyasha, worried written all over her delicate facial features. Quickly, she placed a hand gently on his forehead, as the other vacant hand gripped his upper arm.
"Inuyasha, are you feeling okay? You're not sick are you?"
Everything went silent for a moment as everyone held their breath. Villagers walking past the group gave them weird looks before softly muttering incoherent words as they hurriedly walked off, almost seemingly unnerved by the odd display of behaviour. It was a while before Inuyasha decided to reply, his eyes softening noticeably as he lowered his head.
"Kagome," he breathed gently.. a little too gently, "Your concern for me touches me deeply. Though I do not believe that I am worthy of such an emotion from you, I am extremely grateful that I have a friend like you… thank-you." With that, he smiled at her and made a sharp turn to continue their journey.
However, in the process of turning around, he accidentally knocked a dazed Kagome off her balance, hence sending her stumbling over a rock before falling flat on her behind.
"Kagome! Kami are you okay? I am so sorry. Are you hurt?" Inuyasha cried, worry dripping off his every word as he literally fell to his knees.
Kagome truly looked scared now, "Inuyasha, I'm fine. Don't wo-,"
"No Kagome! Because of my clumsiness, you're hurt now. I don't know what I can do to make it up to you. But for now, climb on my back, I'll get you to Kaede. Don't worry Kagome, everything will be alright… I'm right here for you." He looked intently into her eyes, and had the scene not looked so ludicrous, it might've even been romantic.
"Inuyasha!" Kagome cried desperately, "I'm fine, really! What's gotten into-,"
"Please Kagome! Let me take you to Kaede. If anything happens to you, I won't be able to live with myself! Everyone, please, go get Kaede, and for the love of every living thing, please hurry!" Turning back to face Kagome and cupping the right side of her face, he spoke tenderly, "Don't be scared Kagome… you have me."
"Um Inuyasha, I think Kagome's fine. Maybe we should just move on." Sango offered after seeing Kagome's pleading look, which Inuyasha chose to ignore.
"Kagome?" the silver haired hanyou whispered, "Can you move?"
Standing up in an instant, Kagome straightened up in a huff. "Inuyasha, what is going on here? Why are you like this?!" She sounded exasperated, and slowly Miroku was starting to feel slightly uneasy.
"Because I care." Inuyasha answered without hesitation, almost as if he was reading off a script.
"Okay fine." Kagome sighed, turning sharply to walk away from the situation.
"Kagome!" he instantly exclaimed, and as a result, causing her to turn to him. "Don't move so aggressively. You might injure your wound."
She gave some sort of a shriek and threw her hands up in the air, "Save me!" She cried before turning away abruptly and stalked off with Sango and Shippo not far behind.
The atmosphere became unnervingly quiet as Miroku stood paralyzed in dreaded fear. "Y-You know. That was quiet an impressive job for a first time Inuyasha. I must say, well do-,"
Quicker than the speed of light, Inuyasha whipped around with eyes filled with rage. "Faith, you say Miroku?" his voice shaking with unsuppressed anger as he slowly gripped his Tetsusaiga, "Faith on this!"
And before he knew it, Miroku was running for his dear life.
A good hour after Inuyasha had chased Miroku into a hot spring, the hanyou managed to calm down as he sulked over his hurt ego. Just to be on the safe side, Miroku remained at least five meters away from the half-demon with his hands securely positioned in front of his family jewels as he recalled the unsettling threat Inuyasha made about removing something precious from him.
"Okay so perhaps rule number one didn't work that well, but it was a good first try don't you agree Inuyasha?"
Glaring at the monk from under his bangs, he growled, "Need I remind you of what Tetsusaiga is capable of removing?"
Miroku nervously chuckled, making a mental note to never mention anything about that morning. "Okay, so rule number one didn't work, but let me redeem myself. I guarantee you this will prove to be more successful."
Inuyasha merely looked at him unconvinced.
Miroku ignored his expression and smirked. "Rule number two: Girls like Bad-ass suave guys."
The day had continued on uneventfully after what Kagome had dismissed as a lapse in Inuyasha's mentality, in which Inuyasha could do nothing but silently sulk about his failed attempt in 'wooing' Kagome. No indication of any jewel shards, a sun that seemed relentless in dehydrating the hell out of them, not to mention the run in with Kouga not long enough ago was enough to get Inuyasha into his 'bad-ass' character. Just the mere thought of that wolf intruding onto his property caused a growl to rumble from deep within his chest as it vibrated against his throat before slightly escaping his clenched jaw.
His fists clenched up into tight balls, almost drawing blood when he recalled the smile, although fake, Kagome gave Kouga when he held onto her hands and once a-fucking-gain proclaiming his claim over her as his woman. Damn that mangy wolf. Who the hell did he think he was? And what the hell was Kagome thinking letting him hold onto her like that? Did she like it?! Had Miroku not stressed on the aspect of being suave, Inuyasha was sure he would've long ripped Kouga's throat off… figuratively speaking.
The sun was truly a bitch in all its glory as the heat was starting to become unbearable. Even Inuyasha had to wordlessly admit that the temperature had risen to the point where it had become faintly uncomfortable for a half demon like himself. Shippo, unsurprisingly, was the first to beg for another break, which by now accumulated to their thirteenth stop, eleven of them initiated by the Kitsune alone.
"I agree. A stop is much needed in such heat." And just to enforce his point, Miroku made a quick swipe against his forehead.
Inuyasha could only stand there, arms crossed and silent. Apparently, according to Miroku, that was the suave thing to do, so like.. whatever.
Kagome only smiled in relief, "You guys can rest here, and I'll be back real soon."
Sango lifted her eyebrows up in confusion, "Where are you going Kagome?" she asked whilst making herself comfortable next to Shippo under the generous shade the tree was providing.
"If I recall properly, there should be a lake not too far from here," Kagome tapped her chin, "I just want to wash my face to cool off a bit. Don't worry, I'll take my arrows with me 'kay guys?"
And with a murmur of agreement, Kagome desperately walked towards the direction of the lake, all along, unaware of a certain hanyou following her every move.
'It's time to shine.'
Kneeling on the edge of the lake, Kagome slapped crystal clear water against her face as the cooling substance slid smoothly along her porcelain skin. She could only manage a sigh of relief before she heard a rustle in the bushes behind her. Instantaneously her body tensed up as she turned around, standing to her full height. Her eyes rapidly scanned the area whilst her right hand slowly reached for an arrow. Without even a second to register the sudden red blur, her body was swiftly slammed against the smooth surface of an enormous oak tree.
Simultaneously a soft gasp escaped her lips and her doll-like eyes widened. As she was just about to scream for Inuyasha, the voice in front of her caused a shiver to run down her spine. Whether it was a good or bad thing, she was uncertain.
"Hi there." Inuyasha's voice was unusually deep, even husky, as he seductively gazed down at her with his signature confident smirk. His arms were securely placed besides her shoulders on the tree, trapping her in her position
As confused as Kagome was, she chose to ignore it, "Inuyasha, what the hell do you think you're doing? You scared the hell out of me." Kagome breathed, placing a hand against her pounding heart.
"What does it look like I'm doing?" Again with that smirk.
"You really scared me!" She cried, not knowing what else to say in her perplexed state.
"Why?" He asked lowly, "I'm right here.. aren't I?"
"Inu-," she began.
"Your big strong hanyou rescuing you.. isn't that what you wanted?" Kami he was so close, Kagome was finding it hard to breath. His breath was against her cheek and boy did he smell good.
"I-I don't know what you're talking about.." she stuttered, already feeling the blood rushing straight to her cheeks. If she thought her heart was beating fast before, then her heart must be about ready to leap out of her chest now.
He laughed, if possible, in the most seductive way Kagome had ever heard in her life, "Denial is not healthy Kagome."
Wow, just the way he said her name nearly made her knees buckle, "And besides, I know you're lying.. I can smell it." And just like that, he rubbed his nose against hers whilst keeping his eyes focused on her eyes.
"What's gotten into you again Inuyasha?" she whispered, incredibly distracted by his close proximity. "We should head back to the group, they'll be wor-,"
"No." His gaze was beyond intense now. It was as if he wanted to swallow her up alive.
"Isn't this where you want to be? Just you and me… alone?" His smirk was beginning to look a tad evil now.
"Look Inuyasha, I don't know what's gotten into-," she immediately paused when she placed her hands against his abdomen in an attempt to free herself from his cage. Fighting the temptation to just run her hands along his manly built body was proving harder than anything she had ever come across. She swallowed hard.
This did not escape Inuyasha's knowledge as he huskily looked at her, licking his lips, "Like what you see?" Dramatically, he ran one clawed hand through his hair, much like the modern day shampoo commercials.
All she managed was a little squeak.
"Kagome.." Inuyasha sighed, "Aren't you tired.. you must be."
There was a pause before Inuyasha leaned so close that their lips were mere millimeters away from each other, "..'cause you've been running through my mind all day."
The last thing Inuyasha could comprehend was the resonating sound of Kagome's voice as he ate dirt.
"Get back here you stupid monk!!"
"Inuyasha, calm down! Put down your sword!!" Miroku could not recall the last time he had sincerely feared for his life as much as he did at that moment.
"I swear if you'd just calm down I'd be able to fix this for you!" The monk cried as he leapt over a log.
"Fix?! You're as incompetent as Shippo with women!" Inuyasha retorted, blindly chasing the poor monk through the forest.
"I don't understand what went wrong," Miroku cried over his shoulder, still running for his life, "Did you say what I taught you to say?!"
With a growl that was more frightening than Naraku smiling, Inuyasha roared, "Telling her that she was running through my mind all day was what got me slammed face first into the ground you stupid good-for-nothing monk!!!"
"Alright, alright, alright!!" Miroku desperately panted, "So maybe suave guy approach didn't work-,"
"Okay! It didn't work. But Inuyasha, There is still one that we haven't tried!"
"Shut up!!" Clawing through trees, the silver haired hanyou was gaining speed.
"No hear me out! There's still rule number three! And that's where girls fall for smart guys! That's rule number three!"
Too late… Inuyasha had caught him.
"Anything but little miroku!!"
Upon reaching the village, feudal Japan was by now tinged with a soft orange glow as the sun was slowly yet surely setting. The tired group walked slowly towards their huts whilst villagers nearby excitedly prepared for the night's meal. The once unbearable heat was substituted with a refreshing breeze sweeping through the town, further implementing the tranquility in the already peaceful village.
The coolness in the air was a much-appreciated change as it brought relief to many of the town's people, especially those of the jewel shard hunters
Shippo obliviously strutted into the heart of the village as Kagome and Sango were quietly talking between themselves, but it was more than obvious that Kagome had avoided any eye contact with Inuyasha since their last encounter. Now not only was Inuyasha's pride and ego severely bruised, but he couldn't help but also feel a little bit dejected. To have put himself out there only to be sat so hard that he was sure the ground shook for a few seconds after his body crashed onto the ground.
Miroku cleverly made sure to keep his distance from Inuyasha after his near death experience. He was truly lucky he was able to tell Inuyasha his entire new approach in the span of 5 seconds, or else, no woman on this planet would be capable of bearing him a child… ever. Just the thought of it brought multiple shivers running rapidly down the poor monk's spine.
Upon arriving at Kaede's hut, the demon exterminator spoke. "Can you tell Kaede that Kagome and I are just going to the hot spring?" Sango said aloud to no one in particular as Kagome set down her yellow bag, "We'll be back before dinner."
Miroku, noticing that Inuyasha showed no acknowledgment whatsoever, simply nodded as the two women changed directions and walked towards the hot spring. Clearing his throat nervously, Miroku spoke, "Perhaps this is the time to start preparing?"
"This better work Monk, or you know what's coming." Inuyasha threatened.
Miroku could only gulp as he reached for Kagome's bag. 'Here goes nothing.'
"Oh wow, that bath did wonders." Sango sighed happily as they were approaching Kaede's hut.
"Mm Hm, I feel so- OH MY G- Inuyasha!? What happened to your hair?!" Kagome screeched before rubbing her eyes.
There, sitting peacefully on a boulder, was none another than Inuyasha. Looking innocently up at Kagome and Sango, he pushed a pair of large circular glasses up his nose as he smiled politely. "Ladies." He nodded, "Shall I assume that the cleansing process was of a pleasant one?"
"Umm, I think I'll leave you two to it." With that said, Sango hurriedly made her way towards Kaede's hut.
Kagome shook her head disbelievingly, either from another one of Inuyasha's odd change of character or his hair, she was no longer sure, "Inuyasha.. your hair?" She sounded like a kicked puppy.
"Oh this?" He pointed at his head, "Yes well, I figured this hairstyle better accentuates my intellectuality." Sitting in all his glory was Inuyasha with his haori tucked tightly into his pants, whose hemline reached all the way to his mid abdomen. A pair of oversized glasses, most probably from Kagome's backpack, adorned Inuyasha's face whilst his hair… his hair was gelled slick straight, with an extremely defined line in the middle to part the hair to either side. His hair had almost become a second skin on him as it stuck heavily on his face.
Kagome didn't know whether to laugh or cry at the hanyou sitting in front of her.. with a book in his hands? "Y-you read Inuyasha?"
"Oh yes." He once again smiled politely, adjusting his glasses with his index finger, "I quite enjoy the works of Jane Ass Ten. Beautifully crafted masterpieces I must say. Although I do think that Jane Ass Ten should have perhaps portrayed Dar-key with a little more, shall I say, manners?"
'Jane Austen and Darcy?'
Standing up, Inuyasha walked towards Kagome, who unfortunately realized that his pants didn't even reach his ankles. "Kagome, if it pleases you, would you like to discuss some poetry over our nightly meals? Or perhaps you would like me to recite one that I have composed for you?" He asked, hugging 'Pride and Prejudice' tightly against his chest.
"Yes?" Inuyasha carelessly interrupted, "Why thank you Kagome. I shall begin right away." Quickly yet stiffly, he placed the novel neatly on the boulder and awkwardly straightened his haori, at the same time Kagome was sputtering for him to stop.
Placing one hand across his abdomen and the other extending outwards, he began..
"Oh Kagome, Kagome, Kagome
You are my light in every way.
Oh Kagome, Kagome, Kagome.
How I long for you today.
Your hair smells like berries
That's good because I like cherries.
um… I hope you don't like Kouga
Because he's shorter than my shoulder.
um… your eyes are .. um… are.. are stormy!
They really make me horn-,"
Miroku knew his life was over the instant he heard the loud crash a mile away.
"Enough Inuyasha! Why are you doing all of this? What is the matter with you today?! Are you sick? Just tell me you're sick so that at least I can excuse these odd behaviors of yours!" Kagome's face was red with anger and embarrassment. The nerve of Inuyasha to be playing around with her feelings like this. Her fists clenched besides her, her body stood rigidly stiff and her eyes glared daggers at the figure in front of her that was slowly getting up now.
"Is this some kind of sick game you're playing Inuyasha? Because let me tell you right now that it's not fun NOR is it funny. You may think that you're all high and mighty but that doesn't mean you can boss me around like that!" Not noticing the stung look on Inuyasha's face, she continued, "Sometimes I think you do this on purpose to hurt me you know Inuyasha. And frankly.. it's getting a bit too much." Her screaming had come to a halt, but only worsened as her voice was beginning to shake with bottled up emotions. Inuyasha remained silent.
"You can so easily run off without a second thought to Kikyo, regardless whether we were in danger or not," Her eyes were downcast and her voice held no hope or anger, just hurt, "You leave us for her even though she refuses you, and yet you push me away every time I try to get a little closer. There always seems to be a barrier between us, and.. and I just don't know what else I can do anymore." As much as her eyes stung, she kept her tears at bay. There was no way in hell she'd let Inuyasha see her this weak after all of his pranks, and so she merely stood there with her head hung low.. simply waiting for some sort of response from the hanyou.
It was a long while before she finally provoked a reaction from the half-demon, but unlike anything she had prepared herself for, a bitter chuckle greeted her ears when she looked up to see Inuyasha shaking his head as he tiredly threw the comical pair of glasses on the ground. "Joke." He sadly chuckled once again with his shoulders slumped.
Meeting her eyes, he spoke, "A joke." He nodded as if understanding something he should've known long ago, "All I am to you is a joke." This caused a look of confusion to spread across Kagome's face.
"I'm sorry Kagome. I shouldn't have wasted your time like this," Kagome hated this. She preferred him angry, hell she'd even preferred him furious, but not this. This killed her. The tone that told her that he had lost every single ounce of hope within him was suffocating her, "I knew it was a stupid idea. I knew I shouldn't have gone to Miroku for advice.. but against my better judgment.. I did.. and I guess it's only fitting that I deal with the consequences.
"Inuyasha, what are you talking about?" Any traces of anger could no longer be detected as her voice was now filled with concern.
He shook his head, his head hung low, "Nothing. Just forget it." And with that, he turned to leave.
Instantly the anger in her from before flared up once again, "No! You will not walk away from me! Not this time! You might not want to talk about it but I think I at least deserve some sort of explanation!"
There was only so much Inuyasha could put up with after his severely bruised ego and just a little provocation from Kagome was enough to send him flying in a fit of anger, "Talk?! You want to talk now do you? You, the very person who had just called every shit I went through today a joke! So you say you deserve an explanation. I'll give you one if that's what pleases you your majesty."
That was it. That was the last straw. Inuyasha was flared up and ready to fire.
"You think that I don't care for you. You think that this is some kind of a sick game. Dammit, you even think that I would choose Kikyou over you. Well let me tell you this once and for all… what you think is not law nor is it plausible." He had moved in on her, like a predator stalking its prey.
"If you think I'm such a cold hearted bastard then tell me, would a cold hearted bastard pour a shit load of God knows what onto his head just to be 'in character' or prance around like a retarded dickhead?" Kagome stayed silent, slightly worried that she had really pushed one too many buttons.
"No Kagome, he wouldn't." He stared deeply into her eyes, his intensity almost drowning her. "I went to Miroku for some advice because I wanted to know how to get you to like me. Why, you ask? Because I like you!" In the midst of all of this, Inuyasha failed to see the shock on Kagome's face. "Don't you get it by now Kagome. I like you. I like you a lot. I don't know what I can do to make you understand!" He seemed exasperated by now.
"You feel insecure about me and Kikyou. What about me Kagome? Kikyou is the thing of the past. I have a duty towards her. I don't want her to leave this world alone again. If she.. if she died again.. I don't want her to be by herself, that's why I always rush to her side.. not because I choose one to live over the other."
There was a moment's of silence before Inuyasha spoke with so much uncertainty that all Kagome wanted to do was drop the entire subject altogether, "But when I see you with Kouga.. I.. I can't help but fear that maybe one day… you might just leave me. What would I do then? I-," But before Inuyasha could finish what he was about to say, Kagome leapt into his arms, completely catching him off guard.
The surprise quickly subsided as Inuyasha instantly wrapped his arms around her petite frame as he sighed into her hair. "Kagome." He breathed, relaxing into her tight embrace as he rubbed his cheek over the top of her head. They remained silent and still for a few minutes, simply content to be in each other's arms. "Inuyasha," Kagome softly whispered before gradually pulling away from him, although close enough to remain at arm's length.
"You… are the most stupid person ever. To me, you are Inuyasha. A hanyou with the strength of a demon, but a kind heart of a human. I… I love you Inuyasha. For who you are, not some silly characters Miroku made up."
And suddenly they both understood, and knew exactly where they stood with one another.
Without really thinking, only knowing that he was too happy to be healthy, he gently pulled Kagome by her neck and sealed off their silent promise to each other, to never leave one another, with a kiss. When their lips met, it was so gentle and sweet that it caused Inuyasha to fervently and silently promise that he would make sure that he would make Kagome feel as loved as she did him.
"Kagome?" he spoke against her lips before she reluctantly pulled away.
"Hmm?" she asked, a little dazed as she continued to stare at Inuyasha's lips.
He smirked, "So who did you like out of the three?"
And just like that, Inuyasha was silently glad that he did go to the perverted monk for advice.
An: I hope everyone got a good laugh from this, or at least some sort of enjoyment! Thank you for reading everyone! Personally, if I had to choose my favorite Inuyasha amongst the three, I probably would've chosen the nerdy one! Nerds kick ass! ..
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha etc… but the poem was mine XD