My name is Gil Grissom. I'm the night shift supervisor at the Las Vegas Crime Lab, I'm 50 and my life is perfect and complete.

Well, kind of.

It's just that the more I try to deny the fact that I've fallen for one of my CSIs, the more I realize I can do nothing but admit that I do love her. Only to myself, obviously, cause if anyone knew, I would be instantly fired and my reputation ruined.

But I'm going to do something about this.

First of all, I'll make a list of the most valid reasons why Sara Sidle in not the kind of girl a man like me should fall in love with:

Reason #1: She's 15 years younger than me, she used to be my student and she was so brilliant that sometimes she scared me. But I was the one who taught her all she knows and chose to become her friend and mentor. I guess it's all my fault, so it doesn't count.

Reason #2: She moved to Vegas from San Francisco and started working in my team, which makes me her boss, so we technically can't have an affair. Too bad that I personally chose her and applied to make her stay, so I think it doesn't count either.

Reason #3: She's as stubborn and undisciplined as hell, she never obeys orders (especially Ecklie's) and she doesn't know what the term "respect" means. In other words, she's a wild cat in a world of lab rats… Actually this is one of the things I most like in her. I guess I can't consider this like a reason why I shouldn't love her, can I?

Reason #4: Whenever I try to let her go, she mysteriously ends up in some dangerous situation and I really can't help going to her and stay by her side as long as she needs me to. I know I may seem weak, but it's just that… She needs me, doesn't she? I mean, I can't leave her alone if she's in difficulty. It's not me, of course not. It's bon ton!

Reason #5: She practically flirts with every single guy at the lab. Greg, Nick, Warrick, David Philips, (me)… Even Hodges. I can't accept this. Well, I couldn't. Hadn't I done the same with Teri Miller, Lady Heather and Sofia. But this only means that I'm a friendly man, while she's an undecided, naïve girl who doesn't understand that there's only one thing men want from her, as her disastrous relationship with Hank proves.

Reason #6: Her personality is quite difficult to handle and sometimes I think she's actually a little dangerous. If only this didn't excite me so much…

Reason #7: I don't need her, right? She's just like every other woman in my life. The only difference is that she's… Sara. And Sara's the only one who can scare me. Like when she wanted to leave the lab to join the feds… Or when Trent was about to kill her… Or when she was nearly arrested for being caught driving under influence. Or even the time she… But it obviously doesn't mean anything.

Reason #8: I can't stand it when she's always around, following me everywhere. It's annoying, especially when she tries to make me feel better at any cost. Really.

Well, maybe this is not exactly the truth. It might be a little lie…

Okay, a huge lie.

Reason #9: Whatever I do for her, it never seems to be the right thing. Which is quite irritant, because it's not that I don't do my best to please her. I mean, it wasn't my fault when I asked her to throw away that rotten meat after the experiment. I didn't do that on purpose. Of course I knew she's a vegetarian. I was just… Distracted. Now that I think of it, the fault was all hers: I was distracted by her.

Reason #10: She's addictive. The more time you spend with her, the more you want to have her by your side. If I don't put some distance between the two of us, soon I won't be able to live without her, and I'll want her with me on every case, and get incredibly jealous if some guy…Uh.

Oh, heck, whatever.


My heart skips a beat as she appears on the doorstep of my office. I must make this list disappear as soon as possible.

"What's that?" she asks, as I try to hide the paper under the desk.

"Nothing." I promptly answer, giving her a nervous smile.

She folds her arms on her chest and nods with a strange expression, as though she knew I've got something to hide.

"Right. I just wanted to tell you I've closed my case."

"Er, okay." I mumble, unable to think of anything more better. "Fine. Well done."

She lingers for a moment on her spot, then her lips spread in a half smile and she moves.


She stops one instant before disappearing from my sight and turns back.


I cast a quick look at the list I still have in my hand, trying to remind myself that I wrote it down to get rid of that ambiguous feeling I've always had for her, but I realize that it's not as convincing as I hoped it would be.

My mouth opens before my brain knows what to say.

"Wanna have a coffee later?"

Her face is lit up by a bright grin.

"Okay." She simply responds, then goes away, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

I kind of asked her out. And she said yes.

I must be drunk or something.


I stand up and look again at the list. The ten reasons why I should not love Sara Sidle.

Ten of the infinite reasons why I do love her.