Chapter 8: My true feelings
The snow fell endlessly on the cobblestone path of the cemetery. Sasuke, in his arms was white lilies. He arrived in front of a gravestone, inscribed on it...Uchiha Mikoto
A mother, a wife, a friend and a teacher..
May her soul rest in peace in heaven...
Sasuke placed the flowers on top; he kneeled and offered his prayers, his eyes closed. Sasuke opened his eyes and slowly brushed the snow off the gravestone. He stood up and looked down at the grave.
"I'll be back tomorrow Okaa-san; I'll bring with me the person I love the most. Okaa-san, do you think it is the right time I told her the truth? I cannot help but feel guilty and I know I have to tell her. Guide me once more Okaa-san." Sasuke said as he walked away.
Sasuke was on his way home suddenly his cell phone rang.
"I'll be there." Sasuke said as he disconnected the call.
Sakura was at home, in her art room again finishing the picture of Sasuke when her phone rang.
"Sakura!" Ino shouted on the other line.
"Ino, why'd you call?" Sakura said wiping the paint off her hands.
"Can you come to my house now? I need to tell you something." Ino said.
"Is it urgent?" Sakura asked.
"Yes, so can you come?"
"Can I go there after lunch? I'm finishing something really important."
"ummm...ok...see you then."
Then she closed her phone flipping the cover. It was 10:30 a.m. as she was already finished.
"I didn't expect my work to be finished this fast, well I'll get going to Ino's house then. I'll surprise her." Sakura said, as she got dressed.
Sakura wore something casual. Her outfit consisted of a white long-sleeved top; faded jeans and white ballet slip ons, and around her neck was a dark brown scarf with matching gloves. Sakura locked the door and went off to Ino's house. Sakura arrived there and rang the doorbell. The guard let her in for she told them that Ino was expecting her. She arrived at the study and was about to open it when she heard voices.
"I don't want to do it anymore. I've fallen for her Ino!" the person said.
"That's why I told her to come over here so we could tell her everything. She'll be arriving here after lunch, now that buys us time to think about what we are going to tell her." Ino said.
"There's nothing to think about, we'll tell her that everything about this relationship was planned, from the meeting to the very detail of my words."
"Relationship? Planned?" Sakura asked herself.
Sakura was starting to get confused, and who was the person Ino was talking to?
"Sasuke! We don't want to hurt her!" Ino said.
Sakura's eyes widened, it was Sasuke in there.
"Are they talking about me? About relationship with Sasuke was all planned from the beginning!" Sakura asked herself, she felt tears forming in he eyes.
"Ino! Whether we tell Sakura slowly, one way or another we would hurt her."
"I know that..."
Sakura trembled, she felt her shoulders shake. One of Ino's maid appeared beside her, she opened the door for her. As the door opened slowly, Ino and Sasuke's attention was drawn to the door. At first they saw the maid, but as the door opened even wider, there was a pink blur that ran. Ino and Sasuke ran to the window, and they saw Sakura running.
"Shit!" Sasuke said as he ran after Sakura.
Ino fell on her knees, she was crying.
"I' am an idiot...how could I ever think that by creating Sakura's dream guy would make her happy..." Ino said as she cried.
She was an idiot for getting Sasuke involved in this, for playing in the game so called love. It was none of her business, Ino had her life and Sakura had hers. She does not have the right to meddle in other people's lives, even if it was her best friend's life.
Sasuke chased after Sakura, looking in every place he thought she would go, but no matter how much he shouted her name, or how much he longed for her she would not show herself. What they had done to her was painful, what he had done to her had caused a damage so severe that a lifetime is not enough for forgiveness. It was already nighttime, and Sasuke had given up on finding her. He would not blame her if she would not show herself; the pain was just too much to bear.
Sakura sat in the corner of her room, tears flowing endlessly. She held the bear in her arms, the bear Sasuke gave her. Sakura sobbed uncontrollably, she reached for the phone and called the person who she knew could comfort her sadness.
"Tsu...Tsunade-sama..." Sakura sobbed.
"Sakura? Are you crying?"
"Tsunade-sama! I need you right now."
"I'll be right there." Tsunade said as the line went dead.
Minutes later Tsunade came bursting into her room. Sakura had given her a spare key for her house. Tsunade saw Sakura curled up into a ball in the corner. It pained her to see Sakura this way. She approached Sakura and took her into her arms.
"Sakura...shhh...don't cry...tell me what happened." Tsunade said softly.
"Everything was a lie! Sasuke, the dates, the I love you's! They were all lies!" Sakura shouted as she sobbed even more.
"What do you mean?" Tsunade asked.
"I...I thought he was my prince charming, the person who had finally fulfilled my dreams. Everything was so perfect, so perfect that it wasn't even real!" Sakura said.
"Ino had maybe paid Sasuke to pretend to be the man of my dreams, maybe Ino did that to make me happy...but it didn't." Sakura added.
"I loved him Tsunade-sama! I truly believed that he was finally the one! And he had hurt me in a way I never thought he would." Sakura said.
"Sakura, have you thought that maybe Sasuke had fallen in love with you in the middle?" Tsunade asked.
"Maybe... I don't what to feel pain anymore...Tsunade-sama...I want to go somewhere, to a place where I can fulfill the one dream he cannot lie about, my dream of being a world renowned artist." Sakura said.
"Then Sakura, fulfill them. Don't worry I'll take care of everything." Tsunade said.
"But for now...I want you to forget all the pain and rest." She added.
"Can I leave after graduation?" Sakura asked.
"That's a month from now, are you sure you want to leave that early?" Tsunade asked.
"I'm sure, my aunty lives in Europe; I'll go stay with her. She has been asking me if I wanted to go there maybe it's finally the right time." Sakura said.
"Ok, I'll arrange everything, I hope that whatever decision you make, it will be for the best." Tsunade said as she brought Sakura to her bed and tucked her in. Sakura closed her eyes and fell into a deep slumber.
The next day, Sakura brushed her hair as she prepared for school. Though she didn't want to go to school, she had to even if she had to see them. Sakura arrived at school, joining her friends Tenten and Temari.
"Hey." Tenten said.
"Hi." Sakura said as she sat down beside them.
"I heard that you're going abroad after graduation, is that true?" Tenten asked.
"Yup, my Auntie had been asking me to come stay with her in Europe. There, I can also study and I can fulfill my dream to be an artist." Sakura said.
"Its bell, we have to go to class. Bye Sakura!" Tenten and Temari said.
Sakura walked towards her classroom. She stopped in front of the door; she breathed deeply and opened it.
"Good Morning!" Sakura said.
Sakura walked towards her table and saw Sasuke sitting there. She decided to not talk to Sasuke. Class started and all Sasuke could do was stare at Sakura. Sasuke felt really bad, he was full of guilt, guilt that was slowly eating every bit of him. Sasuke loved Sakura, he always did but he was just confused about his feelings. He knew that Sakura loved him, and he took advantage of that. After classes, Sasuke saw Sakura stand up and headed for the door.
"It's now or never…"Sasuke said as he stood up and ran after Sakura.
"Sakura!" he shouted.
Sakura looked back to see Sasuke running towards her. Sakura decided to run; she didn't want to talk to him. Sakura hid behind the door. She saw Sasuke pass her hiding place. Sakura pushed the door away from her; she fixed herself and walked towards the park. She sat on the swings, tears falling from her eyes.
"Why'd you have to go lie to me…I loved you and maybe you would have loved me too…I'm sorry but it just hurts too much to bear. I'll be gone 3 weeks from now." Sakura said as she cried her heart out.
Sakura had successfully avoided Sasuke and Ino for the whole month, even graduation with the help of her friends.
"Are you really leaving tomorrow?" Tenten asked.
"Yup, will you come see me off tomorrow?" Sakura asked.
"Of course! I'll bring Neji-kun tomorrow." Tenten said.
"I'll bring Shikamaru tomorrow too." Temari said.
"Ok. Well I have to go home and pack. Bye guys! See you tomorrow." Sakura said as she ran off.
That night Sakura packed her things but left the things that reminded her of Sasuke. She left a letter for Sasuke that night too.
The next day, Sakura was now at the airport, boarding her plane. Tsunade hugged her.
"Are you sure you want this?" Tsunade asked.
"Yup." Sakura said as she smiled sadly.
"You're running away from your problems." Tsunade said.
"I'm not, I'm just going away to reflect and fulfill me dream. I'll be back I promise." Sakura said.
"Ok, it's your decision. Take care Sakura." Tsunade said as she hugged her.
Tenten and Temari approached Sakura and hugged her real tight and then the waterworks followed.
"We're going to miss you Sakura! Come back soon, and don't forget to write letters." Tenten said.
"If you want us to come there, just tell us and we'll be there." Temari said as the continued to hug.
"I will, bye guys! I'll miss you!" Sakura said.
"We'll miss you too! Bye! Take care! And don't worry, we'll take care of the Sasuke issue for you." Temari and Tenten said as they waved.
Finally, Sakura turned around, leaving everything behind.
Sasuke found out the next day that Sakura was gone. She left without even a goodbye. Tenten and Temari, told Sasuke to come over to Sakura's house saying that she had left some things for him. That night Sasuke stopped by and went to her room. He opened the door as the smell of Sakura filled his nose. Inside, he saw Sakura's bed and on top of that was a letter.
He sat down on her bed, opened it and started to read.
You might think that I' am running away from my problems. Yes, I' am running because I was really hurt. Sasuke, I was really in love with you. My feelings were real and the words I told you the day of the cherry blossom festival was true. You were exactly what I dreamt of having as a boyfriend. You were perfect. I realized that, everything was too perfect that it was becoming too unbelievable and in the end I guess I was right. Sasuke-kun, I loved you with all my heart, and when you told me you loved me too...I felt so many emotions burst out of me. You were my first love, and I hoped that you would have been my last. Sadly things didn't turn out how I wanted it to. I learned that you and Ino were in it from the beginning. I must say that it was a clever plan, it was almost fool proof. Heck, maybe even the things I heard were also scripted. We all know that all fairytales end in "...and they lived happily ever after. The end." And I thought..."they always do right?"...and I was wrong. My fairytale wasn't meant to end in happily ever after. My fairytale was far from ending. You were just a small part of the fairytale, maybe I am meant to be with someone who would love me truly. Maybe we're better of apart, maybe life has other things in store for us, and maybe life has other people meant for us. Maybe you did love me, but why didn't you tell me the truth? You knew that I loved you and no matter what you did, I would always love you. Even if you did lie to me, if you had told me earlier I would have still forgiven you. It was hard enough to know that you lied to me, but it was harder to know that you were working with my best friend Sasuke-kun, I want you to know, I love you and always will. I can never get mad at you no matter how much hate I put into it. I don't know if I will be able to move on, and I hope that you will find your true love. I know that you wish to find your true love like others wishes. I'll miss you; I'll miss those times we spent together. Those times wherein you made me feel loved. This is the hardest thing I have ever done in my entire life. I know that after this, I will never be the same again. I can't imagine life without you, you have been a big part of who I' am and leaving you is like leaving a big part of myself. Even if I don't want to leave, I have to because maybe we're just not meant to be. I hope that someday, we would be able to meet again and start over. You will always be my Sasuke-kun, and I'll always be your Sakura-chan, my heart will always be with you. I love you Sasuke-kun, take care and till then...
Loving you always,
Tears fell from his eyes as he reread the letter again. Sasuke saw something white near the window. He removed the cloth and what he saw was a picture of him, he smiled. The other one was of a boy sitting on a branch.
Sasuke was on his way home when he decided to walk around the park. He saw two girls and a guy talking under a cherry blossom tree. He did not bother looking at their face, but he knew that the girl sitting had with her a sketchbook. Sasuke climbed the first tree he saw and that was the wisteria tree. He sat on one of the branches; he pulled down his cap covering his face. Sasuke fell into a deep slumber.
That was her? She was the one he saw that day. Sasuke felt a sad smile appear form in his lips. So they met unconsciously.
Sasuke hugged Sakura's pillow, inhaling every bit of her essence. His tears wetting the pillow.
"Sakura...if I could start once more again. I hope that we could start a real relationship because I will never love again. You will be my first and last. I'm sorry for ever hurting you...I also wished that..."
"You were my fairytale come true..."
A/C: Finished! I'm planning on making a sequel! Thanks for reviewing! Bye!