This is not my story. The story is written by a guy I know by the screen name of Purple Cat
Though this story actually belongs to Purple Cat, he has given me permission to repost it here because it's so much easier to read it here.
Also, most people don't feel like sifting through pages of spam when they want to read a story.
Unfortunately, it seems I cannot put a link to the thread where this was originally posted up… look at my Bio for the general site link.