The final chapter, just to tie it up. I pilfered through our old reviews and chose a random question that never got answer. This final question came from Cathy-the-Reader (or Neko-chan)
Kakashi had been alone atop a mountain for well over a year.
He sighed. "The best kind of job is one you don't have to go to."
Kakashi frowned, his serenity broken when he realized that he was still bound by contract to answer foolish questions. Perhaps he'd just jinxed his good luck.
"Curses," he hissed as an eruption of dust inches from his face proved him correct.
To his relief, it was only Anko, who was actually somewhat sane.
"What a pain," she said. "Having to poof up this mountain."
Kakashi struck a pose and opened his masked mouth to recite his trademark blurb of useless knowledge before being asked a question.
Anko kicked him in the family jewels and prevented the onslaught of jargon. Kakashi toppled over and proceeded to cry like a girl.
"Don't answer questions I don't ask, man," Anko commanded. "I was just wondering…If Lee had a twin sister, what would she be like?"
"Oh gawd!!" Kakashi wailed.
"Yeah, I thought it was pretty frightening, too."
Kakashi spared her a tear-stained glare before rolling over on his side. "Why don't you ask Lee's sister yourself?" he hissed.
Anko turned to see Lee's head pop out of a gopher hole. Except it wasn't Lee, because the eyelashes were multipled by five.
"A youthful greeting to you all!" Lee's sister cried, wriggling out of the gopher hole. She popped to her feet, the spandex revealing a rather buxom figure that was diminished due to her face, which looked just like Lee's. "Yosh! Who's up for some training!?"
Lee's sister grabbed Anko's arm and frogmarched her down the mountain. "Rather than poof down the hundred thousand miles high mountain side, let's jog with ankle weights!"
"OH GAWD WHY," Anko screamed as she and Lee's sister disappeared from view.
Kakashi drew a pained breath and got on his knees, to find a teenaged girl standing before him.
"You!" he roared. "You're that author lady in the sky!"
"Dude, it's so uncool to break the fourth wall. Besides, I'm here to end your contract."
"Really?" he asked suspiciously.
"Yup. I love you, man, but this show's gone to the dogs." She produced a key and unlocked the invisible handcuffs around Kakashi's wrist. "Glee is the new 'it' thing, you dig? See ya."
The girl disappeared.
Kakashi, momentarily unsure of what to do with his freedom, just stood gaping at the spot where the girl had vanished.
"Glee?" he repeated. "What's so great about Glee!? It would be a lot cooler if Mercedes had more screentime!"
Whipping out Icha Icha, Kakashi turned angrily and made his way down the mountain.
We're big fans of Glee. The show would be a lot better without Rachel, Puck, Finn, or his girlfriend. There needs to be more Mercedes and Kurt, man. :O
In the tradition of lameness, I present the final chapter of Mysteries. Thanks for reading it back when my sister wrote it.