Disclaimer: Everything is mine now! MWAHAHAHA! What? That was only a dream? Oh...Unfotunately, it all still belongs to JKR. If it was mine do you think would Remus be with Tonks instead of Sirius in the books? Right.

PMS: Pre Moon Sickness


I am seated on my bed hugging my knees to my chest. How could I presume that since Sirius described my eyes so eloquently he feels platonic towards me? I am off my rocker. In fact, I broke my rocker, so I took it, sold it to a Russian bloke, and burned a hole in the floor where it used to be.

The door opens. It's Sirius. The universe hates me. I state, "Listen, I shouldn't have gotten so angry. I care about Sapphire, but if it really bothers you that we're friends then I won't talk to her anymore." I cannot bear to have any of my comrades upset with me, especially him. I know this would not be chivalrous treatment of her, though I am willing to do anything to please Sirius. Unwise, yet true whether I like it or not.

"No." He comes over to my four-poster and sits beside me, though not close enough for us to touch. "Don't do that and don't be sorry. I'm the one that should be apologising, not you. Why do you always think everything is your fault?"

I shrug. I am not certain of the answer myself. There's a silence. An awkward silence. A long awkward silence. A pathetically long awkward silence. I glance up at Sirius through a curtain of what I'm told is light brown hair, expecting him to break the tension as usual.

He does. "Prongs and Evans are both sure of something."

"Oh?" Mentioning James and Lily's names in the same sentence typically means trouble.

"Yeah…" His sensual voice trails off.

"You look constipated." That occurs more frequently than it should. "Maybe you ought to go to the infirmary and get some drugs."

"I tried, but Madame Pomfrey wouldn't give me any, nor would she let me leave until I put a hospital gown on and played doctor with her," replied the dog animagus, twisting his fingers in uncharacteristic distress.

"Is that why you've seemed odd lately?"

"Nah. What Evans and James assure me is that you're interested in me. I don't know about that, but I've thought about it and I do know that I've fallen in love with you 'cause I feel empty when you're not around and I wanna kick anyone's arse that tries to get into your pants, but if I were to get into them…Well, that'd be acceptable. More than acceptable." That's my beloved Sirius: blunt beyond belief. His tone had been cool and smooth, though it is obvious he's nervous. I'm anxious also; convinced that I heard him inaccurately.


He cups my face in his strong hands with more gentleness than I expect from him. Gazing into my eyes to ensure that I do not misunderstand, he says, "I love you, Moony." He connects our lips ere I can reply. His sumptuous tongue explores my mouth, clearly savouring the moment like he'll never receive another opportunity to kiss me. I use my own tongue to caress his in reassurance, barely realising what I am doing. My brain shuts off and all I perceive is, 'Oh Merlin, this is amazing! Oh Merlin, this is amazing! Oh Merlin, this is amazing! Oh Merlin, the girls are gonna join together to kill me slowly!'

To my stupefaction Sirius pulls away first, desiring clarification. He grins. "So, you love me too?" It seems unnecessary to inquire; I nod regardless. I would speak, however, mere breathing is currently a challenge. He leans forward to buss me again.

"Sirius, wait." He cocks his head in confusion causing himself to resemble his dog counterpart. I have no doubt that this shall sound foolish, yet I articulate it anyway. "Will you say some chat-up lines to me? I've always been jealous of the girls you say them to."

"Sure," he chuckles. "When I saw you from across the room I passed out and hit my head on the floor, so I'm going to need your name and address for insurance reasons."

I do not have many phrases committed to memory, yet I try my best to retort. "How charming. When I'm older I'll look back on my best experiences: the day I was married, the day my children were born, and the day I met you."

"That's sweet. So, you don't mind if I stare at you up close instead of from across the room?"

"Of course not because this is the first time this ever happened to us. All twenty-seven of my personalities find you attractive." We pursue this banter for several minutes until I say, "I've never had sex. No matter what you do, kiss me all over, dance for me, or wear provocative outfits, I won't give in. Want to test me?" I only stated it as an amusing line, though Sirius takes it literally.

"It would be my pleasure to test you." The suggestive inflection in his voice makes me blush. He puts his hand on my bent knees and shoves them down to force my legs flat. His hand drifts to my torso and he slowly pushes me onto my back. His handsome figure glides over my prostrate form so that our bodies are pressed together. His grey eyes are dark with lust.

I hasten to explain that this is not my intention. "I only said that to be funny. Rules of courtesy dictate that it's too soon in our relationship for this."

"Screw courtesy." It's me I worry he's going to screw. I've fantasised about this, though I confessed my emotions a short while ago, after all.

"Padfoot, this isn't-"

"Shh." He brings his lips to mine with more passion and aggression than before. The dance of our moist tongues and my fingers in his silky hair command my attention and I do not comprehend how my shirt gets removed and winds up on the floor revealing a chest that is fairly more muscular than you probably speculate. What you do not conceive is how much strength it involves to carry as many books around the castle as I do.

Sirius' mouth shifts from mine and his breath skims across the scar on my left cheek with a reverence that leads me to believe he has wished to do that for a vast amount of time. Next, he sucks on my neck. I murmur something that might have been an oath or may have been his name. Whatever it is causes him to smirk into my flesh. If we do not cease in a couple of seconds I'll lose the ability to resist him any further. This should be a positive prospect, yet something about this feels rushed. I open my mouth to tell him that, however, there is no air in my lungs. His teeth graze my nipple and I gasp.

That breath is precisely what I require. "Don't..."

"Don't do what?" Grinning provocatively, Sirius proceeds to kiss down my abdomen to the waistband of my trousers. His tone is husky with desire. "This?" He grinds our hardened groins together. I feel it acutely in spite of the fabric obstructing their contact. Spots of colour cloud my vision. Colour? For a brief moment Sirius Orion Black bestowed me with the benefit of witnessing colour. He fails to recognise the priceless gift he gave and slides his hand inside of my trousers to grope me. I whimper uncontrollably with ecstasy. Satisfied, he fondles me more vigourously. My eyes roll back and my mind partially numbs. I cannot remember my own name, though I recollect his.

With the last of my waning self-control I beg, "Please, Siri, no." The pleading note in my voice is what finally draws his focus away from my impassioned body. He glances up the length of my figure to my face. "I'm enjoying this."

"I noticed." There's that self-assured grin that makes me want to slap and kiss him simultaneously.

My cheeks become heated again. "But…"

He takes his hand out of my shorts, pulls himself upward, and positions himself so that his form is hovering above mine with our lips centimetres apart. "But what?"

I whisper, "But I'm not ready yet."

"No, you're not." Sirius expels a defeated, disappointed sigh. "I should've known that." My heart constricts, fearing that I've thwarted his expectations. I needn't have fretted, for seconds later his mouth moves near my ear and he purrs softly with the easy confidence that he and James have always flaunted, "Maybe not for a while, but sooner than you think I will have you, my polite, innocent little Moony."

A shiver of arousal travels up my spine. "Yes," I rasp. As if he needs any more encouragement. He sits up and hands me my discarded shirt. No sooner do I don it that the dorm door reopens.

James enters, which is unsurprising, though the identity of his companion baffles me. It is not Peter, who is in detention.

"What's the problem, Lily?" James regards Sirius' ruffled hair, my flushed skin, and our swollen lips with a sly smirk. "I see no need to talk sense into anyone."

She sighs, relieved. "Well, they worked things out, then. I was just thinking-"

"Don't. Earth could explode," returns Sirius.

I swat his shoulder lightly. "Be nice."

He peers down his perfect nose into my eyes with his constant smile in place. "Anything you want."

A rare mischievous look graces my features. "Be careful what you promise."

Everyone chuckles.

James declares, "This has been a swankified day for all of us. Let's celebrate."

"How?" queries Lily warily.

"We could leave Hogwarts grounds and apparate to Muggle town and go to a cinema."

Lily is impressed. "You know about movies?"

"Yes, and we're not going," Sirius loudly announces.

She fixes him with a questioning expression.

I explain, "I took him to the theatre once and he thought the big people were going to reach out of the screen and tickle him."

"Riiiight. We'll do something else."

"How about recite poetry?" I recommend.

Sirius and James groan in revulsion, as I knew they would.

"Okay," she agrees most likely to irritate them.

They protest in unison, "We don't want-"

She interjects, "One of my poems is:

People are annoyed by my responsible manner,

So I beat them with a hammer.

Something to learn from this (don't scoff)

Is to never piss me off."

James pales. "Shakespeare or Po?"

Minerva's Note: What did you think about Moony and Padfoot's escapade? I hope you enjoyed it and the entire chapter! Please please please please please please please please please (You get the idea.) review!