Summery: In which, Harry and Draco try to get the better of one another. Will it all end in tears? Or kisses?

A/N: Here's some entirely pointless Harry/Draco. This plot bunny has been hopping around in my head, so I thought I had better set him free. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Anything you don't recognise, is mine. Especially the boy-slashy bits.


I Hate You


"Piss off, you giant git!"

"You piss off, you - you self-obsessed prissy-boy!"

Harry and Draco seethed, their faces only inches apart as they spat insults at each other.

"You unwanted orphan!"

"Stupid Death Eater!"

"Go back to the orphanage, Annie!"

"Run home to Voldie!"

The tension rose with each retort, the argument more growing volatile, as they determinedly attempted to out-do the other. The surrounding crowd cheered and egged them on, a circle of students from every house and of every year, with Ron and Hermione at the forefront trying desperately to contain the crowd and to calm the two fighting boys.

"Malfoy, leave Harry alone!" Ron yelled over his shoulder, as he caught a third year Ravenclaw by the arm who had gotten a little too excited and tried to take a swing at Hermione.

"Harry, stop! He's not worth it!" Hermione called exasperatedly to Harry, her arms outstretched to keep the worst of the Gryffindors back.

Harry and Draco had their hands latched to each other's shoulders, shoving the other about as best they could while being shaken themselves, neither willing to let go, as their voices clamoured to rise over the noise of the crowd.

"SODDING BASTARD!"

"FUCKING IDIOT!"

Draco gave Harry a particularly vicious shove, which caused Harry to stumble back a few paces, though he still held to Draco with a deathly grip.

"YOU CAN'T EVEN FIGHT PROPERLY!"

"YEAH - WELL - I BET THAT ISN'T EVEN YOUR REAL NOSE!"

With an affronted squawk of indignation, Draco lunged at him - Harry tactfully latching one leg behind Draco's, and shoving him with full force, meaning to knock the other over. Unfortunately, Harry's leg only managed to lock Draco in place, and as Harry moved to shove the slightly shorter boy, they collided. By their mouths. Successfully shutting them up.

The crowd around them stilled, everyone stopped shouting and cheering. Ron and Hermione's expressions were a picture of horror, while the crowd looked on in shock. The air in the hall became thick with unnatural silence and unspoken apprehension. No one dared breathe.

When Harry and Draco finally pulled away from each other, having lingered rather longer than one probably should on their enemy's lips, they both had a dreamy look about them, before the familiar anger reassembled in their eyes.

"I'M GONNA KICK YOU RIGHT IN YOUR WELL-TONED ASS!"

"YEAH, WELL I'M GONNA RIP OUT ALL OF THAT SHINY BLONDE HAIR!"

"YOU'RE GONNA WISH YOU NEVER LOOKED AT ME WITH THOSE BEAUTIFUL, DEEP, GREEN EYES!"

"I WONNA TEAR APART THOSE SILKY LIPS!"

"MEET ME IN MY PRIVATE ROOMS IN HALF AN HOUR!"

"I'M MISSING YOU ALREADY!"

And with that, the two boys turned and walked away from the fight, leaving the stunned crowd gaping in their absence, both with a smug smile plastered on their face. Ron and Hermione, and indeed the hall at large, decided wordlessly that they would never speak of this day.


A/N: I just... I don't even know. *shrug*

-Emerald-