I Have Changed My Name So Often

"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?"

A sultry smile. "As much as I can recall, Sir."

"State your name for the record."

"Um..." The guard prodded her. "Yolanda."

"Very well, you are charged -" The clerk whispered something to the judge, who sighed in frustration. "State your real name for the record."


"I remind you that you are under oath. NAME?"


The judge looked at the clerk who shrugged. "Right then. You..." He checked his papers. "Oh for jhew lun dou... NAME!"

She looked down. "I- I don't recall, Sir."