Shark.

By Adrian Tullberg

888

Dr. Gregory House, MD, wondered if it was worth getting up today.

After all, there was no interesting case waiting for him, a (most likely) room full of people who needed ten years of training and certification to have their hands held, their sniffles wiped and boo-boos taken care of, and his prescription had been refilled yesterday so there wasn't any real need to head to the pharmacy.

He shifted around on his right hip. Today felt like a good day to just ignore the outside world -

- his foot touched someone else's.

Okay, now he was awake.

He prised open one eye. Apparently Dr. Allison Cameron looked very good in the morning. The sort of 'natural cute' that any plastic surgeon would give his right eye to inflict at will.

And her shy little just-woken-up-and-glad-to-see-you smile wasn't helping either. "Hi."

"Ah ... "

Someone who had a bad hangnail just jabbed him in the thigh.

From behind.

House slowly turned, as he examined the bleary expression of Dr. Lisa Cuddy. Not quite the morning person Cameron was, but apparently she slept topless, so who, in all honesty gave a crap?

First. Get his cell phone. Record evidence of this event. Then work out what happened last night.

Something was moving underneath the covers. It looked suspiciously like...

... Wilson's head popped out of the blankets from foot level. And his morning hair was still immaculate.

Scratch the photos. The one person he would have shown without some form of transaction involved was more than an eyewitness.

A heavy silence as the group tried to retrieve events from last night from long-term storage.

Then the question that was preying on everyone's mind was voiced.

"Do you think we still have an audience?"

"Well ..." House got up to a sitting position. "In one night, we've satisfied the desires who wanted me and her-" House jabbed at Cameron "-me and you-" he gestured at Cuddy "-and all those people on the Interweb who close their eyes, and truely, truely believe, that if two men really, really love each other, they can grow babies in their rectums."

"I didn't need to hear that this early in the morning."

"Maybe we can string this out ... but let's face facts. We've not only jumped, but boned the shark."

Cameron brushed her hair back, Cuddy deciding that is just wasn't natural to look that good when they've just woken up. "Who's left?"

"People who like better writing ... medical show addicts ... and people aware of a television industry outside of America."

Cuddy held her head in her hands. "We're gone."

Cameron raised a finger. "Hang on ... maybe we can shift the focus to other characters ... focus on patients and other doctors in the interim while we wait for interest to resume for us ...?"

Chase's tousled head popped out next to Cameron. "Sounds good to me."

"Crap."