Just a quick conversation between Sheppard and McKay. Short and hopefully amusing. Also, I'm over here pretending that O'Neill is still in charge of the SGC...cause it's funnier that way.
Colonel Sheppard flicked his gaze across the width of the jumper to look at McKay, who was currently flipping through one of the dozen or so books of Fairy Tales that had arrived on the Daedelus for the Athosian children.
It had been General O' Neill's idea to send the books, along with several...other things that would help to 'Bridge The Cultural Gap' and allow the Athosians a closer look at what the people of Earth were like.
The Fairy Tales Sheppard could sort of understand. What simpler way to explain the ideals of human kind than with the stories we heard as children that were meant to instill the morals we hold most dear?
So yes, the Fairy Tales were a natural choice.
The fact that a big screen projector and several Three Stooges shorts had been included in the shipment was rather befuddling though. He could only take it as the General's sense of humor asserting itself.
While Sheppard's mind had been careening off in the direction of General O'Neill's sense of humor, McKay had been reading through the books.
McKay snorted suddenly as he flipped another page.
"You know, I'm starting to think Prince Charming was one sick puppy," he stated, as though this sentiment would make perfect sense to the other occupant of the jumper.
Sheppard looked at McKay questioningly, "What are you talking about, Rodney?"
McKay scoffed and replied without looking up from his book, "Have you actually read these things? This is some of the most perverted stuff I've ever come across. In fact, I don't think that it's such a good idea for us to give these to the Athosians. They might start thinking we're all some sort of miscreants."
"Fairy tales...perverted. You lost me, Rodney."
McKay looked up at Sheppard with an expression of long suffering that he just didn't get it. "Alright look, Prince Charming is the worst degenerate I've ever seen in all of these stories. Take Snow White, for instance. This girl is supposed to be dead, right? Sure, she's gorgeous, but she is, for all intents and purposes as far as the prince knows, dead. She's in a coffin with all the trimmings and he still wants to make out with her...doesn't that strike you as somewhat...I don't know, necrophiliac in nature?"
Sheppard looked at McKay with a tilt of his head, "I can honestly say I've never equated anything in a fairy tale as being necrophiliac in nature, McKay."
McKay scoffed, "Alright, ok, fine. What about Rapunzel, then? Now there's a story with weird connotations if ever there was one. She's been kept in this tall, tall tower her whole life, the symbolism of which is a clear representation of a man's-"
"And we're changing the subject." Sheppard cut in, keeping the conversation from taking a turn for the uncomfortably weird.
"But I wasn't finished!" McKay said snippily, upset at being cut off in mid-explanation.
"Oh yes you were."
"No I wasn't."
"Yes, you were." Sheppard looked at him pointedly, "Move on, Rodney."
McKay scowled and crossed his arms over his chest, "Fine...no Rapunzel." He thought momentarily before speaking again, "Alright, how about Cinderella?"
"What about her?"
"Well, this is supposed to be the most beautiful woman at the ball, right?"
Sheppard sighed, "Yes...and?"
"And? You really have to ask?" McKay gestured with his hands widely, "She's the most gorgeous woman there and the only way that the man who has fallen in love with her over the course of the evening can tell her apart from all the other women there, is by her shoe size. I mean, geez, did his glasses fall in the punch? Was she wearing a paper bag over her head? The guy clearly had a foot fetish."
Sheppard thought on this for a moment, "Maybe the dress her fairy godmother set her up with was so low cut that the prince didn't bother to look at her face?"
McKay tilted his head and looked off to a point in the distance that only he could see, "Now that is a distinct possibility."
A/N: Hm…not as funny as I thought it would be. Oh well. I still rather like it.
These are my own observations on Fairy Tales, which I've had for quite a long while. I've shared them with almost everyone I know, and have gotten a lot of weird looks for them. I tend to overanalyze everything, which seems to be part of the whole 'Obsessive Compulsive Disorder' package, and it drives my friends nuts. Frankly, I think that McKay would have the same observations, and would have NO problem telling EVERYONE about them.
Just like me. God that's disturbing.
Tell me if you liked it, if you didn't...well, not everyone gets my humor and I can't blame you.