This is a two-part one-shot. Yes, I know it's an oxymoron. Just think of the first chapter as the intro and the second as the main part! 8D

Ahem. This story also contains (light... I think) shoujo-ai (in the second chap). Don't like, don't read, capische?

Well, the fashion show's over. Wasn't a total disaster, so that's good. Some close calls, though. When my dress ripped, first thought was "OhcrapI'mscrewed." Lucky my solution went over so well. Jesse said Takeshi looked liable to get a nosebleed at that point. That's a picture. Getting a nosebleed over me? Yeah, right.

Anyway, I actually…kind of… liked wearing a dress, and lipstick and all that girly-girl stuff that usually ain't my thing.

Yeah, this is why I keep you where I keep my underwear. Bet no one would think of looking there… Maybe I should, like, get a padlock for you or something instead, huh?

But anyhoo…

Heh, diaries are meant to keep secrets, to pour out your thoughts and feelings and all that crap, and here I am stalling. I'm such a dork.

Okay, here goes.

Part of the reason I liked getting all dolled up is that I knew Takeshi was watching and I wanted him to think I was pretty and there, I said it. It's stupid, huh? And selfish and…

Okay, I said it and I'm not stopping now because you're a diary goddamnit and you're not telling anyone.

I like Takeshi Jin. As in "like" like.

And I don't want to tell him because, SURPRISE, I'm worried about ruining our friendship. Total cliché.

No… Actually, I really want to tell him, but I'm too damn nervous, all right?

I try and try to tell him but the words get all jumbled up before they even leave my mouth.

But I'm never good with emotions anyway, and this one… well…it never showed up until recently.

Apparently it doesn't feel comfortable in me, or else this would be a lot easier to do.

I hate this. The nervousness, the butterflies I get in my stomach sometimes…

him moping over Fantine, his attitude, him making me FEEL like this.

Why, Takeshi?

Why does it have to be you?