Flibber T. Gibbet
Disclaimer: C'mon people! This is fan fiction! Not the stuff in manga!
Author's notes: Thank you for the four reviews I got for "Do You Really?" Not meant sarcastically… though a few more would have been nice. Ah well. This ficlet is dedicated to all the perverts (not like it's a bad thing) out there who can't see an innocent Tootsie Pop without naughty thoughts. Especially for Andrew, who has made me throw away more than one sucker with his lewd comments. Read and hopefully enjoy!
For once, Naruto was sitting still, intent on savoring his orange Tootsie Pop thoroughly. Across from the blond, his teammate, Sasuke was trying his considerable best to read a book. I say trying because he was currently… ah, distracted by Naruto's intense azure gaze and his pink tongue sensually caressing the round candy. How Sasuke desired to be that blasted orange lollipop that held his lover's focus. He was horny, dammit, and he needed Naruto. Stupid sucker, he thought vindictively, that is MY DOBE! Go away before I trash you and your worthless stick! His fantasies of Naruto and the sucker's demise were shattered by the blond's words.
"Hey, teme! Don't hurt my lollipop!" As oblivious to the world as he was, he could still sense the Uchiha Death Glare™ aimed at his candy.
"Kiss me, and I'll think about it," growled the sexually frustrated Sasuke.
"We just had sex, like, half an hour ago!" Naruto whined, not wanting to leave his candy.
"I see an orange sucker lying hopelessly in the trash." threatened Sasuke.
"You wouldn't!" The horrors!
"Says who?" muttered the dark haired teen.
"Bastard." When the going gets tough, revert to basic insults.
"That's not what you said half an hour ago," Sasuke smirked. " 'Oh Sasuke! Harder! Faster! Love you so much! SASUKE!'" he mimicked and laughed genuinely when Naruto blushed. "I had thought I had done a good job taking your innocence. I mean, just think about all the times and places we've done it… And yet, here you are, blushing like a virgin."
"Shut up," the blond retaliated weakly. Woe to the creature that was in the way of a, well now, the determined Uchiha's path.
"Make me," he quipped childishly. Naruto remained silent. Sasuke continued on a different thread. "How many licks does it take?" tilting his head towards the saliva covered candy.
Naruto's customary blinding grin reappeared. "One thousand six!"
Sasuke slowly crawled off the bed and swaggered to the blond. "And how many licks does it take to get to Naruto's creamy filling?" he whispered hotly into Naruto's ear.
"I don't know…" he whimpered as Sasuke began nibbling on his earlobe. A quiet whisper brought the flaming embarrassment back to the blond's whiskered cheeks.
"I guess we'll just have to find out, eh, Naru-chan?
Needless to say, Naruto had an ache over the next week that even Sakura couldn't heal.
Well, that's it. I seem to a disease that inhibits my ability to write anything over a thousand words. Reviews are really, really appreciated! Hint hint. I hope this brought a smile to your lips.