Robin In The Middle

"You…what?" Robin couldn't believe what he was hearing. It must have been a hallucination, brought about by some plot of Slade's, or perhaps Beast Boy's tofu pancakes.

"We both want to be your girlfriends," Starfire replied earnestly, and Raven nodded.

Robin was still having trouble believing what he was hearing, but it was hard to refute the evidence – or his own ears. It wasn't that Robin didn't care about Starfire, it was just that she was so…effusive…and Robin wasn't. And it wasn't that Raven didn't care about Robin, she just didn't know how to show it.

Robin knew that they both cared about him, but as long as neither of them – well, mainly Starfire – pushed the issue, he didn't have to choose. And he was mostly happy about that, because he didn't think he could choose between them. But if he'd never expected them to talk to each other about the situation, he'd definitely never expected them to agree to share him.

And don't I get a say in this? Robin wondered, piqued. But, then again, you like their solution, don't you? another part of his mind spoke up.

And…well…yes, he did. He was just irked that he hadn't thought of it first. Not that he would have dreamed in a million years that they'd go along with it.

Robin stared at them, eyes going so wide that he felt the glue holding his mask in place start to give. He blinked, recovering, and asked, "And…you really want to…share me?"

They both nodded, but Raven expounded on their answer with, "Well, you're so obsessed with your work that you barely have time for one girlfriend."

That made absolutely no sense. He was willing to give Raven and Starfire the benefit of the doubt, though, and let them explain. "And somehow you think I'm going to find the time for two?" Robin demanded, shocked causing his impatience to come to the fore.

Raven smiled sardonically back, and said dryly, "No. We just think that there's nothing wrong with keeping each other…company…while you're busy doing other…things." The intentional pauses in her speech lent quite a bit of innuendo to her words and most of it deserved. Starfire grinned at her in agreement, and wrapped a companionable arm around Raven's waist, underneath her concealing cloak.

Robin felt sweat break out all over his body as he gawked at them. The blood in his body couldn't decide whether it wanted to rush to his cheeks or his groin. His body itself couldn't decide if it wanted to have a nosebleed or pass out. His mind couldn't decide if he wanted to continue fantasizing about Raven and Starfire together, or just try and kiss one of them.

Luckily – or maybe unluckily – they decided for him. Starfire removed her arm from Raven and leaned in to give him an almost bone-crushing hug. Raven stroked one hand down the side of his befuddled face in a caress, and then they both kissed him, quick pecks on opposite cheeks.

"We'll just leave you to…assimilate the changes in our relationships, Robin," Raven told him, and he could have sworn she was smirking at his disconcertion. At least she was being tactful about it, though. "We know you need some time to get used to this."

Starfire, however, had not managed to obtain the meaning of the word 'subtle' when she'd learned the English language. She nodded rapidly and said, "Yes, and when you have finished with your brooding, you can come and find us. For now…" She turned to Raven and smiled. "Come, my new shared girlfriend, Raven, we shall do the painting of the toenails," Starfire enthused, rising up into the air in her glee. "I have the most lovely shade of lavender. With silvery sparkles of glitter!"

"Let me guess," Raven said dryly, even as she followed Starfire's loop-the-looping form down the hallway. "It matches your costume."

Starfire nodded energetically. "Yes, and it goes with your hair, as well. And Robin's costume, too, I believe."

Raven actually showed her shock with a rapid-fire blink and a momentary slowing of her walk. "You managed to find a shade of nail polish that goes with a walking traffic light?" she said mockingly. "I'm impressed."

Robin listened to them talk until they vanished from hearing range and wondered what he'd gotten himself into.

Well…at least it wouldn't be boring.