Two viewpoints

Disclaimer: Discworld, Carrot, Angua, and everything solid in this fic belongs to the most brilliant of literary artists, Mr Terry Pratchett. All the thoughts and scenarios in this fic are mine, mostly. But you already knew this anyway, didn't you; otherwise you wouldn't be reading this. The songs is back when, by allstars.

Angua will be written like this,

Back when will be written like this.

Angua

I remember how it ended too soon.
My head's still spinning; I'm alone in my room.

It wasn't her fault, Angua reminded herself. It was Salacia. Ever since that stuck-up bitch had waltzed in, Carrot had been different. It didn't help that Angua started acting less human when she was around. She simply couldn't help it. 'Sally' was smooth, confident, and despite what she said, constantly chatting up Angua's boyfriend.


Can't forget ya, don't you know that it's tough.
My head's still aching' and the pain is too much.

She knew fine well that she was not welcome around Carrot when Angua was there, so she suggested that they should patrol together 'to break the ice' even though she knew that patrolling was done in pairs as a general rule. Angua had seen it coming, but it still hurt like…like a silver dagger in her heart. When he left her, she felt truly savage for the first time since she came to the big city. The betrayal was more intensely painful than anything else that she had experienced. It was at this point that she stopped paying for chickens.


It's your touch, it's your kiss
every night that we miss
When the stars shine above
that's when I miss your love.


She didn't want to remember him. The fun, and the love, in the past was just that; the past. No amount of brooding would bring them back together. Her human self realised this, but she couldn't help herself as a wolf. On those cold wet nights that seemed to be happening more and more often, when the moon lit up the sky and she took to four paws, Angua remembered a warm basket and a strong hand stroking her head smoothly, and it was all she could do not to howl.

Oh baby
staring at the moonlight
just another lonely night
wishing you were back in my arms
underneath the starlight
dreaming of another time
back when your sweet love was mine.


Afterwards she'd scold her dog self. She knew that they'd never get back together. Besides the fact that they could never have children (for obvious reasons) ,he praised Sally repeatedly. He almost seemed to worship her. One dreary night, she'd confronted him about it. He'd taken her too seriously, and had listened to her when she said that he could always leave if he loved Sally that much. He had answered that he would leave her if he was causing her any distress, or if she wanted him to. At this she had lost her temper. She hated, hated, HATED it when he got all reasonable. He walked straight out after she was done yelling. They had seen each other since, but only at the Watchhouse. Seeing him without talking to him, seeing him with Sally, was the worst thing that had ever happened to her.


I'm still hoping you'll walk back into my life
and show me heaven, make everything right.
Do you feel it, is it hard to let go?
I'm still in love, I thought you should know.


The dreams were getting stronger. Not a just vague sensation of wellbeing, but the reassuring smell of Carrot that meant that all troubles were in the past. Of course, they were not real. They were just memories, replaying in her head. It made everything seem that much worse, waking alone after smelling those strong, solid, protective feelings and knowing it would never be that way again.


It's your touch, it's your kiss
every night that we miss
and I watch you move on
can't believe that you're gone.

She could try her best to deny it but the truth was simple; she loved him. Not just his smell or the way that he always cared so much about everything. Everything about him made her feel better than she'd ever felt before, and she'd only realised it after the argument that had separated them. It was haunting her, the lost opportunities, the way he seemed to have forgotten everything that they had shared such a short time ago, but most of all the suspicion that he had only been with her because he felt obligated to. The last thought was a creeping shadow in her mind, faint, darkening every thought, consuming the brightness, dulling the joys and fuelling the pains.

Oh baby
staring at the moonlight
just another lonely night
wishing you were back in my arms
underneath the starlight
dreaming of another time
back when your sweet love was mine.


As time crawled by, she could try to convince herself that she didn't care anyway. She told herself that she had always felt this dark. She said that werewolves were born dark, and she forgot what it felt to be light. Dogs were turning up disembowelled in the morning after the full moon, and their blood powered her. She felt no qualms. At least not many.

There was only one time that she remembered and cared enough to stop. It was a scruffy street dog that smelled like it had already died.


And whatever I do
I keep thinking it over and over
Imagine you close to me now.
Are you feeling it too?
Just wishing you were here with me, here with me

It had spoken to her. In human. She didn't hear a word it said. She wanted its blood. "Angua! You don't want to do this! Think of the good times we've had! I saved your Bloody life, remember!" Irrelevant. Mongrel. Not even worth eating. Fight back! "Don't you remember anything! Your brother Wolfgang! Gavin!" Words. Useless noises. Why doesn't it fight? "What about your vegetable boyfriend? Carrot? What happened to you and Carrot?" CARROT!Strong solid protective Carrot! Where was he? (Can't think of that.) Why is he gone? When will he next see me? (too late). Overcome by a tide of memories, Angua moaned, whimpered, HOWLED, whilst Gaspode stumbled away as fast as he could manage.


Way back when our hearts were together
you said that you'd stay in my life forever.
You told me we'd last for all time.
Back when you're sweet love was mine

The tide came in. She couldn't stop it. Why? WHY! WWWHHHYYYYYYYYYY!
Why did it have to hurt like this? Carrot was gone. CARROT IS GONE!
He was going to be there for her forever, and now he wasn't and she doesn't know what to do!
In a blinding white panic, Angua tore through the streets, blundering as if she had inhaled silver powder, in so much pain inside that the only sound leaking out of her silvery muzzle was a high pitched keening.
And the citizens of Ankh Morpork, both the good, the bad and the ugly, shivered, wrapping their clothes more firmly around their shoulders and closing the windows to
keep the wind from whistling around their rooms with such a painfully mournful sound.
If Carrot breaking up with her was the beginning of the end, then this truly was the final stroke.


Staring at the moonlight
just another lonely night
wishing you were back in my arms
underneath the starlight
dreaming of another time
back when your sweet love was mine.

After that night, even Colon could see that there was a difference about Angua. She showed no emotion when she followed trails of blood to murder victims, and indeed, seemed to enjoy the sharp metallic smell. She walked with a half crouch, seeming to be always on the prowl, though Fred couldn't even try to guess what she was hunting. The most noticeable difference was in her eyes. They bore no resemblance to those of a human. They were the eyes of a wolf. No one felt that it was polite to mention it to her, and besides, they were bringing in more criminals every day now that she was working harder at hunting, but it preyed on their minds. Besides, they knew why she had changed, and they didn't want to stir it up. The past was behind them, where it should be.

Staring at the moonlight
just another lonely night
wishing you were back in my arms
underneath the starlight
dreaming of another time
back when your sweet love was mine.

If they only knew. If they KNEW that Angua now was more savage than her brother, they would try to kill her on the spot. They had suspicions that she wasn't as tame as she had been, but they believed that if Angua couldn't cope then she would tell them something.

But the truth was, Angua had not been human since that night. Her logic and compassion were hardly troubling her at all any more. If someone had tried to see her thoughts, they would find that she did not see names, but smells. In short, Angua was dead, and there was just another savage beast.

There was only one name still to be recognised. Red haired, tall, well polished, healthy. Carrot…

And then the echoes faded…

and no memories were left. Just hunger, fear, anger, run, hunt, eat, NOW!

And a faint aroma of strong soap, and tenderness, and peace, mingled together.

Please review! Or I won't post the next instalment. It's in two parts so far- One for Angua and one for Carrot, which I am currently in the middle of writing- with a possible epilogue from Sallys' POV, though the story doesn't really need it.

Anyway, back on track. If you want the second half of the fic, please review. I won't post it when I finish it otherwise!