Title: Things Not to Do at Xavier's Institute for Gifted Youngsters

Summary: The following rules apply to all students and faculty, as well as any guests or allies that come to visit. Please realize that breaking a rule will result in harsh punishments.

Disclaimer: X-Men: Evolution does not belong to me. I just like to play pretend with the characters.

Amelia Notes: Okay, a bazillion-gazillion of these things have been written in various fandoms. I haven't found one for Evo. So I decided to write one. Also, this takes place after the end of the series, but doesn't

Format: (in case you don't figure it out)

Bold words are what Xavier has written

Italics are various comments that students have scribbled nearby the rule. To prevent confusion the notes will be written in semi-script format so the reader knows who writes what (though the students aren't really writing it like that because they know each other's handwriting). Also, because this is in writing, no accents will be used (e.g. Rogue would not write 'Ah' instead of 'I'), except for slang words (like 'ya'll' or 'crikey' or 'dude'). Please note that a great deal of time passes between scribbles.

So, confused yet? Good.

The following rules apply to all students, as well as any guests or allies that come to visit. There are to be no exceptions. Please realize that breaking a rule will result in harsh punishments.

1) Hiding Scott's glasses is not funny.

Kurt: Usually

Bobby: For the most part.

Ray: Unless he's wearing those funny 'sleeping goggles'

Scott: I'm in charge of your next Danger Room session.

2) The creation of static electricity for the sole purpose of making people shock each other and/or making their hair stand on end is strictly forbidden.

Ray: Yeah, but did you see Jean's hair?

Bobby: And Sam's?

3) Do not try to change someone's code name. Especially if it is not yours.

Tabby: I think Mr. Logan likes Badger.

Kurt: I don't like Wild Blue Yonder Boy!

Alex: Wild Blue Yonder Boy? That rocks!

Kurt: I'm calling you Sharkbait from now on.

Jamie: Sharkbait, hoo-ha-ha!

Alex: Dude, I don't get it.

4) Clean up your messes.

Scott: This means you Bobby!

Bobby: Man, Amara leaves things melted all over the place and no one yells at her!

Amara: Oh yeah? Sam breaks things!

Sam: Hey! I do clean up my messes!

5) Do not leave things inside people's bodies.

Kitty: How come there is a whole rule written just for me?

6) Using your powers on something 'just to see what will happen' is forbidden.

Remy: But that was funny!

Jean: You tried to charge a BOMB! They're already supposed to blow up! You don't need to charge them to blow up some more!

Remy: How does something 'blow up some more'?

Rogue: Shut up, she's right

Remy: Hey, whose side are you on?

Rogue: Mine. I've had to listen to whining about singed eyebrows for the past three days!

7) Scribbling on this rule sheet is NOT ALLOWED!

Alex: Dude, even I know that's not going to work.

Jamie: Sharkbait hoo-ha-ha!

Alex: wtf?

8) Do not even think about using Nair on Mr. McCoy.

Bobby: I hadn't…until now.

9) Glitter does not suit everyone.

Roberto: Except Ray and Alex.

Ray+Alex: The minute we find you…

Jamie: Sharkbait hoo-ha-ha!

Alex: Omigod, dude, what's your fricking malfunction?

10) Playing the 'air-guitar' to that song (you know which one I'm talking about!) in the foyer is not allowed; even if it is something you can all agree upon.

Lance: With the lights out, it's less dangerous! Here we are now, entertain us!

Alex: I feel stupid, and contagious! Here we are now, entertain us!

Pietro: A mulatto, an albino! A mosquito, my libido!

Bobby: And I forget just why I taste, oh yeah, I guess it makes me smile

St. John: I found it hard, it's hard to find

Scott: Stop it! Do NOT put any more of that song on this paper!

Ray: Oh well, whatever, never mind

Scott: Thank you, Ray.

Remy: ROFL

11) Wanda is allowed to hex Toad as much as she wants.

Wanda: I think this is an excellent rule.

Toad: Oh, schnookums-bumkins-lovey-pie, you don't mean that!

Wanda: Erase it. ERASE IT!

Sam: He wrote it in pen.

12) Rule #11 is not a real rule, please disregard it.

Wanda: Damn


Forge: Why not?

Pietro: It's fun.

St. John: Especially the pelvic thrust bit.

14) Mr. McCoy's lab is off limits. As is Ms. Munroe's greenhouse and garden.

Bobby: Sam spilled that stuff and broke those test tubes.

Sam: Bobby froze those herbs.

Bobby: Amara tried to thaw them out and scorched them!

Amara: Which I wouldn't have had to do if you hadn't been clumsy in the first place!

15) Taunting people in a language they do not understand will get you in trouble.

Roberto: Maybe, but he still won't understand it!

Ray: I have got to take Spanish instead of French

Wanda: I'll assume this rule doesn't apply to me when I'm speaking to Todd?

Pietro: Or me when I talk to Daniels?

Lance: Not our fault they're not multi-lingual

Rahne: Yeah!

Kurt: Lance can speak another language?

That's the first installment of rules! I've got two more installments ready to go up, but you have to wait until next week. Why? Because I feel like it. Honestly, I'm trying to keep ahead of myself, so that if I have to stop writing for a few weeks, I'll still be able to update. If you have any suggestions, please use the 'contact' on my profile to send them to me.

Oh yeah, and this fic might sporadically disappear, since I think it's dancing on the edge of some of FF.N's rules.