Title: OOPS - The Challenge (Ch 3, the scene where Natsuki is at the cliff and thinking about Shizuru)
Author: ficeler37
Note: Don't own Mai-Hime. Sometimes I dream about getting hired by Sunrise to write Omakes, hehe.
Rating: PG
Word count: 426

A/N: Since people have expressed interest in my crack fics, I have decided to dedicate more of my time in this genre. Someone asked me to increase the Shiznat fluff in the crack fics, so this is what I came up with. Enjoy!


Narrator: Last time on The Challenge …

Without planning on coming here, she nevertheless parks her bike next to the rail. Her long blue hair dances wildly under the influence of the capricious wind as Natsuki leans against the rail and stares out into the horizon. Shizuru, are you leaving me once and for all? Are you abandoning me like my father did? Not you too, Shizuru…I miss you…

Shizuru: Natsuki!

Shizuru charges passionately towards a startled Natsuki.

Natsuki: Shizuru? What are you doing here? This is supposed to be my monologue. Our first interaction scene doesn't come out for another chapter!

Shizuru: As if I can ignore my Natsuki's desperate pleas. (hand on flushed cheek)

Natsuki: CUT! Director! Where are you?

ficeler37's muffled screams can be heard on the side of the road.

Shizuru: Nice, those spider webs I bought from Nao really came in handy. I think I need to stock up more. (Just in case you are wondering how Shizuru racked up a bill of 10,000 yen in Hime-sentai's First Patrol.) Here I come, Natsuki!

The fangirl-possessed Shizuru tries to tackle Natsuki.

Natsuki: Hey, get off me! The rail is not strong enough to hold up the both of …

The iron bolts of the rail pop out.

Natsuki: Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!

Shizuru chooses this inappropriate moment to grope Natsuki.

Shizuru and Natsuki both fall off the cliff.

On the way down …

Natsuki: DURAN!

Duran appears on the edge of the cliff.

Duran:  

Readers scratch head.

ficeler37's girlfriend hands translator earpieces to readers. (Courtesy of Youko from Mai-Otome)

The scene rewinds.

Duran: Don't look at me. I sink faster than a rock.

Duran snickers and backs away from the cliff.

Natsuki: Stupid metallic mechas! Shizuru, can't you call out Kiyohime? Since part of your child is the head of an octopus, Kiyohime should know how to swim, right?

Shizuru: Like you said, it's the head, and an octopus doesn't use its head to swim. You can't expect my babies Ichiko, Niko, Sanko, Yonko, Goko, and Rokuko to swing their heads around and act like they are tentacles. (shakes finger at Natsuki)

Natsuki: (sweat drops) You named the snake heads?

Shizuru: Easy for you to say when Duran only has one head. How did you think I trained my babies if I can't order them around individually?


Natsuki finally remembers that she's still falling off the cliff.

Natuski: (high pitch scream)

Shizuru gropes Natsuki some more.

Up on the cliff …

Duran nibbles at the tied up ficeler37.

ficeler37's girlfriend calls 911.