Summary: Who knew fruit could be so sexy?
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any of it's characters...I do however, own this story and the events that happen in it. Tehe.
It was times like these, that he wished he'd stuck to his inaudible grunts to convey his thoughts and feelings on certain subjects…That way he wouldn't have gotten himself into this situation in the first place, right?
The Uchiha heir cringed, the familiar voice hitting a high note as it neared the end of the infuriating suffix. Sakura. Obsidian eyes glared at the crumpled form of his blonde lover, sprawled at an interesting angle at the opposite end of the room- An irritated snort released, nostrils flaring with discontent.
'Serves the dobe right if he's dead…If only he'd kept his big mouth shut long enough for me to come up with a plausible excuse…'
Sasuke's internal rant came to an abrupt halt, a grimace curling the corners of his mouth.
'Not that there was any other reasonable explanation…You can't just pass off that make-out session as an 'accident'…'
Yes…An accident- He'd tripped over Naruto during a naked sparring match and ended up glued to his lips. That was entirely conceivable, right?
The muffled footsteps seemed to approach at a steady rate, the soft padding becoming clearer with each passing moment. Scowling darkly, the Sharingan user cast his thoughts back to the events that had led to his untimely capture- Bound hand and foot to a chair with the help of Neji's new skill at producing chakra infused rope.
It had all started with that blasted tangerine…
Breakfast was supposed to be a time of relaxation- The first meal of the day was supposed to be a quiet affair, the comfortable silence punctuated by the normal eating noises; 'crunch', 'nibble', 'chomp'…Or in Naruto's case 'slurp' as he was so fond of ramen. Today however, he'd deviated from his usual routine of ramen and spoiled milk, this time opting for fruit. Not just any fruit though…It was a tangerine.
Now, one might wonder why the Uchiha would deem the tangerine as a special kind of fruit- One might also wonder why he was staring at the shorter blonde with something akin to a thirsty beggar happening upon an oasis in the middle of the desert.
Then again, not everyone knew that Uchiha Sasuke was a closet pervert. Yes, it would seem that anything about his rambunctious boyfriend set him off these days.
So here he was, gazing intently at his lover from across the table, his chin cupped in one hand; the other idly tracing circles on his partially bare thigh.
The Kyuubi container finished peeling the dusky fruit, slightly clumsy fingers meticulously separating the sweetness inside into appropriate segments. Sasuke's eyes widened fractionally, the boy leaning forward ever so slightly with anticipation.
Naruto gnawed lightly on his lower lip and eyed the segments critically, his hand reaching out a couple of times to snag one, only to shy away at the last moment. Sasuke's eyes narrowed, an impatient breath hissing out from between clenched teeth.
'Fucking tease….' he thought savagely, the hand that had been resting on his leg shifting to the edge of his chair, his fingers gripping the wood reflexively.
The blonde released a sigh, reaching out for the third time to finally seize the largest piece out of the small pile. Slowly, he lifted it to his mouth…The gap between those pouty lips and the fruit closing with each passing second. Sasuke's cheeks flushed warmly, lids drooping to half-mast in expectation. Finally…
He'd paused. The bastard had ceased all movement. The tangerine slice was mere inches from his mouth, and he'd stopped to open his mouth…To bother him with something. The Uchiha's eye twitched.
"What is it, dobe?" he replied gratingly, wincing inwardly at his tone.
Naruto gulped nervously, wondering what had caused the dreamy look on his boyfriend's face to falter. Laughing awkwardly, he rubbed the back of his head with his free hand.
The silence stretched out between the two, and Naruto diverted his attention from the brooding male across from him, back to his beloved meal. Sasuke turned away from the blonde, his body facing off to the side…But not so much that he couldn't keep an eye on his kitsune's antics.
Naruto moistened his lips in preparation, the slick movement of tongue across velvet skin not missed by the hawk-like gaze from the other side of the table, his eyes closing seconds before the fruit entered his mouth.
Sasuke almost lost it then and there. It wasn't just the look of pure ecstasy that rivalled the expression the blonde usually wore after one of their 'all-nighters'…No, it was that…That sound he'd made once the succulently sweet taste had assaulted his taste buds.
The dark haired Uchiha's groin tightened considerably, the lightweight shorts he wore feeling all the more confining and uncomfortable. Had Naruto shrunk them the last time he'd done the laundry? He glanced down at himself thoughtfully, then raised his eyes once again…Only to have them nearly pop out of his head.
'Mouth…Sticky…Naruto…Sexy…Oh. My. God…'
A trail of sticky juice had trickled out the corner of the boy's mouth, leading a trail down to the point of his chin, highlighting the dimple there. The dimple that only Uchiha Sasuke knew about. And in his mind, it would stay that way.
Naruto lifted a hand, swiping at the juice accumulating around his chin, slipping the fruit coated digit into his mouth- and sucked.
Sasuke made a strangled noise, causing the blonde's eyes to pop open in surprise.
"Sasuke?" he mumbled around his finger, completely forgetting to remove it first.
That was it. That innocent look…The way he still had that blasted finger in his mouth…His poor teenage hormones couldn't take it anymore. With a low growl, the dark haired boy leapt across the table, tackling the startled blonde to the floor with enough force to shake the entire apartment.
Sasuke pinned the other to the ground, a fierce glow entering his eyes as he gazed down into pools of baby blue. Murmuring something incoherently, he captured Naruto's lips with his own; his tongue tracing the curve of the blonde's lower lip- pressing lightly until he felt the vibrations of a defeated moan tremble across his own quivering mouth. Lips parted, access granted…And it was an all out war; an entrancing duel between dominant and submissive. Hands wandered, caressing whatever flesh those questing fingers revealed; hips ground against one another, passionate kisses traded in for harsh nips and suckles along exposed tanned flesh. Soon enough, both of them had dispensed with clothing- And Sasuke's hand was already slipping between the two of them…
"Oh my God…What are you two doing!"
The two froze, completely shocked.
"Ohayo mina-chan…I got lost on the road o-…"
Sasuke unglued his lips from Naruto's, sending a frosty glare at the intruders; the danger somewhat lessened by the embarrassed flush dusting his cheekbones. There, standing in the kitchen doorway, was Sakura and Kakashi.
"Are we…Interrupting something?" Kakashi queried, an eyebrow lofting above the only visible eye as he casually covered Sakura's line of vision. No need to taint her already fragile mind, anymore than it had been.
"There's a…Perfectly good explanation for this…" The Sharingan user began, frantically trying to think up an excuse that didn't involve coming out of the closet.
Naruto folded his arms beneath his head, frowning slightly; "What's there to explain? You got all horny and rabid…And tried to jump my bones, not that it hasn't happened before…And not that I'm complaining…"
Sasuke couldn't believe his ears! The moron just blurted it all out, like there was nothing wrong with what they were doing! It was blasphemy, it went against everything…
"What did you say…?"
Both boys shot the pink haired kuonoichi a frazzled look, suddenly feeling the overwhelming urge to run. Sakura calmly removed the censoring hand from her face, cracked her knuckles and glared menacingly at the blonde who was currently still beneath Sasuke. It was obvious who the scapegoat would be this time…And every other time too for that matter.
Wisely, Sasuke rolled off of Naruto, one hand covering his unmentionables, and quickly beat a hasty retreat to the ramen lover's bedroom, the door slamming shut behind him. It was only then, as Sakura began to advance on his vulnerable self, that Naruto realised what trouble he was in for…
The hysterical scream of; "How dare you taint my Sasuke-kun!" echoed loudly throughout the village.
Yes…All because of that damned tangerine, and Naruto's big mouth…The two had found themselves in vulnerable positions; Naruto laying unconscious in the corner, covered in various welts and bruises, and himself strapped to a chair. Life couldn't get much worse.
The footsteps paused and the door opened slowly, revealing the figures of Sakura and Ino, both dressed…In monk's clothing? The two entered the room, and took their positions in front of the inwardly quailing Uchiha, solemn expressions on their faces.
"Now Sasuke-kun…We know Naruto forced you into it, so don't worry…" began Sakura confidently, ruffling his dark hair.
"…And now we will begin to purify your tainted body and blasphemous soul! We are going to de-gayanize you!" Ino added helpfully, pulling out a rather large bible text with the words 'The Dummy's Guide to Exorcism'- with the word 'Exorcism' crossed out and the word, 'De-Gayanize' scribbled above it.
"But first, we've got to get rid of your clothes and cleanse your body with all these disinfectants we stole from the medical ward! Don't worry Sasuke…You're in safe hands!"
Sakura smirked comfortingly, slipping on pink rubber gloves.
"H-hey! What're you going to do with that! Dobe, wake up! Untie me! He-ack!"
Actually, it seemed it got a whole lot worse. And the funny thing was; Sakura was strangely enough turned on by the two boys making out. Not that she'd tell anyone anyway…
Spirit: Yosh! My first one-shot, and my first try at Yaoi! Tell me what y'all think; constructive criticism is welcomed, and complimentary reviews even more so!