Danny was surprised to feel the smirk turning his lips up. It felt good. Even better was what had caused it…or who.
Grinning now, Danny glanced over at him. Both hands on the wheel – at ten and two – eyes on the road, the perfect image of a nominee for safe-driver-of-the-year. Danny knew better, of course. At times Martin was reckless at best in his driving. One memory in particular came to mind. The two of them with a rare weekend off, driving to upstate New York to some cabin that Martin had good family memories of – something unusual for his past. Martin had been determined to get there in two hours – needed to make good time – and Danny was pretty sure they were going to crash off of the side of the winding road and end up hidden amongst trees and brush, and no one would ever find them.
That weekend itself brought a softer sort of smile to Danny's face and he couldn't help sneaking another glance at Martin.
"What?" Martin asked, voice brisk, all business with only a tiny hint of amused curiosity.
"Nothing," Danny answered innocently, unable to hide his smile. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Martin raise an eyebrow, but he said nothing. They drove on in silence and Danny went back to his memories. It was somewhat sadly that he observed how Martin's driving had changed slightly. He was more cautious now – where before his appearance of safe driver masked the rebellious reckless one beneath the surface. Now it seemed truthful.
Danny sighed softly to himself and turned slightly to look out the passenger side window. It was leftover trauma from the shooting he knew. Bad, dark memories about being in a car. Just like he knew that if he brought that up Martin would angrily snap at him and the wall between them would grow.
Things had been off with them for such a long time, and Danny knew that it all started with the shooting. More importantly it started with his not being there for Martin afterwards, something he continued to feel guilty about. Something he wasn't quite sure how to rectify anymore. And past that there was Martin's addiction, another thing pushing them apart. Another reason for Danny to feel guilty…but also angry, hurt and uncertain. He wanted more than anything to make things right again because he missed Martin. He missed them. And truthfully they had never really 'broken up' – had never talked about it anyway. They'd just stopped seeing one another outside of the office. At first it was hurt and anger – unspoken of course – that had kept them apart. More recently it had been a distance that Danny had willingly imposed.
Martin was still in the fragile first steps of recovery, and Danny knew he shouldn't be involved with anyone for a while. Martin needed to focus on himself, taking one day at a time, all that good twelve-step stuff that Danny reluctantly, but truthfully, put so much faith in.
But today…well, Martin had smiled at him today – all blue eyes and dimples, a predictable blush in his cheeks. And Danny had felt a small shift in the air between them, felt something loosening in his chest and for the first time in a long while it was easier to smile. And now, though Danny realized they were on their way to look for what could possibly be a dead child, and their attitude should probably be decidedly somber, he couldn't suppress his smile. Nor could he suppress the surge of lust he'd been feeling since the moment he saw Martin this afternoon. Danny had always enjoyed Martin in jeans, but the orange t-shirt fascinated him for some reason, caught his attention and wouldn't let go. Top it off with one of those FBI windbreakers that that Danny had always – almost embarrassingly so – thought looked good on Martin.
He was wonderfully hooked and suddenly determined to do something about it. No more avoidance or hurt. He wanted it all to end. He wanted Martin back…something he knew wouldn't be easy, but he refused to continue his passivity. And all of the sudden, there was no time like the present.
As Danny got out of the car he glanced around, noting how the park was little more than woods filled with a series of hiking and walking trails. It was also deserted. Grinning, almost giddy with anticipation now, he practically ran around the front of the SUV to Martin's side. Martin had slipped on his sunglasses and was just starting to step away from the vehicle when Danny stepped in front of him, a mischievous grin on his face.
"Danny…" So much exasperation, annoyance and Martin in that tone of voice that Danny's smile only grew. He stepped closer, trapping Martin against the SUV. Still not touching him, but close now. Close enough to feel the heat coming off of Martin's body, to have the scent of him – something long missed but instantly recognizable – invading his senses. Time to take his chance.
He reached out with both hands and gently pushed Martin's sunglasses up, off of his face and onto his head.
"What are you doing?" Martin asked, hint of nervousness in his voice now though he was trying hard to hold onto the exasperation. Danny continued to smirk at him, loving how playful he felt, hoping – in the end – that Martin wouldn't push him away. He leaned closer, hands landing on Martin's shoulders and running slowly down his arms.
"I've missed you," Danny said simply, voice low, as if those three words explained everything. He couldn't help grinning as Martin's eyes went wide, as a blush appeared on his cheeks. So predictable. For a moment Danny could easily believe it was three years ago. He didn't give Martin a chance to resist or argue, closing the distance between them and kissing him.
Fingers slipped into short hair and he wrapped an arm around Martin's waist, nearly whimpering into the kiss. The feeling of being this close, pressed up against him, kissing him…it was so long missed. Painful but so sweet, right and real. For a moment – but only a moment – Martin didn't respond, but then his hands came up, tentatively on Danny's arms and then around his back and he began kissing Danny back. It was slightly unsure, hesitant, even clumsy, but Danny couldn't help smiling against Martin's lips.
He made the kiss deeper, gently pressing Martin's mouth open, slipping his tongue inside, tasting him, exploring…and suddenly things became needy, desperate almost. Martin's hand came up, pressed into the back of Danny's neck, pulling him closer, deepening their kiss. Danny moaned, backing Martin up against the side of the car, hands on his hips pulling Martin tightly against him, feeling that they were both already hard beneath their jeans. Too long they'd been apart. Far too long.
Danny's hands pressed into the small of Martin's back, swiftly pulling up windbreaker and orange t-shirt until he could touch skin. And Danny broke away from Martin's mouth to breathe, panting and licking his lips. Paused for a moment to meet Martin's eyes – bluer than normal – passion and need written all over his face. And then Martin was kissing him again, had pulled Danny forward, taking control of the kiss and thrusting his tongue into Danny's mouth, determined, hot…Danny felt his knees weaken. Martin's hands found their way up underneath Danny's shirt and windbreaker, pressing into his back, all heat and want.
Danny broke away again, breathless. He nipped at Martin's bottom lip, then kissed his chin, his jaw, moving towards his ear. Felt Martin shiver as Danny started to kiss his neck…lips against his soft skin, tongue tasting salt and Martin, teeth nipping gently, wondering briefly if he was leaving marks. But Martin didn't seem to care, clutching him close, pushing closer, his hips grinding into Danny's.
Breathless and shaky and Danny knew it wasn't a protest. He returned to Martin's mouth then, needing more of those deep, searching kisses. Bold now, confident Martin wouldn't resist, he dragged his hand down across Martin's chest, fingers trembling only slightly over that soft orange fabric. He yanked it up then, fingers teasing gently at Martin's stomach, around his navel and then lower, unbuttoning his jeans, tugging down the zipper. He felt Martin tense for just a moment but then he was eagerly pushing himself closer, hand at the back of his neck, pulling Danny harder into their kiss – all bruised lips and tangled tongues now. Martin moaned low in his throat when Danny closed a hand around his cock. Danny found himself smiling against Martin's lips again, both of them gasping for breath.
"You're so hot like this," Danny whispered against his mouth, stroking him, thumb teasing the tip, eagerly taking Martin's shudders. Martin bit down on his lower lip, eyes squeezed tightly shut as he whispered Danny's name. Danny kissed him again, shivers wracking his body when he felt Martin's hand at his waist, fingers clumsy, tugging open the buttons on his jeans.
"You and your damn button fly," Martin muttered, breath hot against Danny's mouth, their foreheads pressed together.
Danny opened his eyes and met intense blue ones sparkling with a hint of mischief. He very nearly laughed – heart lighter than it had been in a long time thanks to Martin's mutterings and his eyes – but then Martin closed his fist around Danny's cock, stroking him deftly, and Danny couldn't think. He moaned instead, capturing Martin's mouth in another deep kiss, sloppy almost, too hot to think about finesse…just knew he wanted more. Their movements were frantic by now, kisses deep, wet, all tongues and teeth and swallowed moans. Stroking one another a little roughly, desperate to come, reveling in each other's touches.
Danny knew what they must look like would anyone pass by and see them. And he could imagine how well that would go over with the Bureau, with Jack…with Martin. But it didn't matter. Not now. Only a few moments more and it was enough. Danny broke away from Martin's mouth, breathless, heard Martin's sharp cry as he came, felt liquid warmth covering his hand. He jerked upwards into Martin's fist and came too, the other man's name on his lips, a choked moan of sorts.
They very nearly collapsed, Danny leaning on Martin, Martin leaning on the car, both of them out of breath and more than a little shaky. Danny finally managed to look up, lifting his head from Martin's shoulder when he felt Martin's hand on his cheek. Martin's eyes were soft, warm, a smile on his lips. Danny sighed, smiling back and kissing him again, mouth lingering over Martin's, fingers gentle, running through Martin's hair. He felt so light, floating almost. A part of him had been dreading Martin's response to what they'd done. He'd known it was a very big possibility that Martin could've walked away, shutting Danny out even further.
"I've missed you too," Martin murmured shyly, blushing.
Danny felt his heart flutter in his chest. He pressed another kiss to Martin's lips, noting happily his swollen lips and the perpetual flush on his cheeks. They pulled away reluctantly, Martin quickly opening the SUV again, digging around in the backseat until he found a towel, cleaned himself off as best he could and then tossed it to Danny while he buttoned and zipped his jeans.
Shaking his head, Danny laughed at Martin's efficient nature. "We should probably throw this away," he remarked, grinning as he fastened his jeans. Martin nodded briskly, eyes now searching the parking lot. Danny knew reality was setting in for Martin, and his mind was probably scolding him for such rash actions.
But as they left the car behind, stopping to toss the towel into a dumpster at the edge of the parking lot, Martin grabbed Danny's hand just as they entered the trail. Danny raised his eyebrows, surprised when Martin leaned in and pressed another kiss to his lips. "Later," he whispered. "We need to…"
Danny smiled and nodded. Talk, he knew. Talk…and do so much more. Start over. "I know," he said simply, squeezing Martin's hand. As an afterthought he reached up and pulled Martin's sunglasses down off of his head – they were slightly askew now – and put them on him again. Martin laughed, probably over the fact that he'd forgotten the glasses were even there. Danny laughed with him and slipped his own sunglasses on as well.
And he knew the woods had the potential to bring pain – possibly finding a dead child was never something they wanted to do. But there was Martin to look forward to again. They could shut out the harsh reality of their job and find one another again. And Danny was glad he'd taken a chance.