Uhm, yeah. This is my first Bleach-fic, so also my first Renji/Ichigo-fic, so don't blame me if it's crap. I'll do my best.

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach, nor any of the characters bla,bla.

Warning: Character-death, Renji/Ichigo in later chapters and crappy grammar since I'm Dutch


A small breeze went through the Karakura-graveyard. The last leaves were blown away from the solitary trees, which hovered over the plain gravestones. People were crowded around one particular spot in the usually empty graveyard. They were all watching the man in the middle who held a solemn talk about life and the departed. Three coffins lay in front of the man, decorated with pure white flowers.

One boy stood out amongst the others, he was dressed in a black suit, which scruffily hung around his young body. His bright orange hair swayed in the gentle breeze, covering the brown eyes that were filled with sorrow. Dark bags ringed his eyes, showing the obvious lack of sleep.

He simply stared at the coffins, even when the other people around him gathered and walked away. He got a few pats on the shoulder while other people looked at him sympathetically.

He ignored all of them; they weren't of any importance. Not now. He had now lost everything he ever loved: both of his sisters, even his pop. They might have bickered a lot, but that didn't keep him from loving his dad. Now they were gone, rudely snatched away from him. He was all alone.

The faces of Yuzu and Karin flashed in front of his eyes; they looked up at him, admiring him like only little sisters and little brothers could. His crazy dad, always positive, though serious when needed. He would have gladly taken their places, but now it's too late. They're dead. No… murdered. A bitter smile graced the boy's lips as he clenched the three white flower in his fist.

He remembered, Karin, dying in his arms. The only audible word she could put out was 'shinigami…' when she took her last breath. He didn't understand, what did she mean? Did the shinigami do this?

He didn't want to think about it any further. He shifted his eyes to the sky and mumbled a small pray. He felt a lump coming into his throat and clenched his eyes shut. How he had wished he would never have to cry again. But it was just too much.

His body started shaking as he held the tears inside, he would try to keep them inside.

A small group of four still stood nearby, worriedly watching the orange haired boy. "Maybe I should go to him.." one of them said as she started walking to the said boy. "No Inoue-san" Urahara said as he gently grabbed her shoulder. "I think it would be better if we leave Kurosaki-san alone for awhile." She looked at him and slowly nodded as her eyes shifted back to the boy. She was shocked when she had heard about the incident. Ichigo hadn't gone to school the days after and today was actually the first time she saw him since. Of course they had called him and dropped by the house, but never did someone open the door, nor did someone answer the phone. She had been worried, still is. And now seeing him like this made her stomach turn. It was obvious, Ichigo hadn't taken care of himself the last couple of days. His hair was even more ruffled than it normally was, he looked like he hadn't decently eaten for these couple of days and the normally stubborn frown wasn't there anymore.

"Maybe we should ask him to stay at one of our places, you know… to keep an eye on him" Ishida suggested. The others looked surprised at him; the other always acted like he didn't care about Ichigo, but apparently this incident had also touched him.

"My my Ishida-san, never would have thought hearing you say that " Urahara teased "Willingly taking a shinigami in, in your own house, very touching" He continued, while he grinned widely. "Shut up… I'm just suggesting we should keep an eye on him, just look at him, it's pathetic" He bickered back, while he glanced over his shoulder to the said boy.

Urahara's grin disappeared and solemnly looked at the boy, he had been a good friend with Kurosaki Isshin. A nice and gentle man who would protect his family at no costs, just like he had probably done now, he just couldn't believe the man just simply died. Isshin was strong, not someone you could kill in one hit. This was planned. To add, Ichigo hadn't seen their souls, what did it mean? Did they just disappear? Did they accept their death? It had to be something strong, hollow? No, Isshin could have handled that. A shinigami? He shuddered, what kind of effect would have that on Ichigo? He snapped himself out of his thoughts and started walking to the boy. The others followed him.

"Kurosaki-sannn!" he yelled out, snapping Ichigo out of his thoughts. Ichigo glanced over his shoulder and offered a weak smile at his friends, he felt like he had neglected them. Urahara, not convinced, frowned at him. "Kurosaki-san, I insist you stay in my shop for a couple of days, you look like a wreck" Urahara said none to gently, looking the other in the eyes. "I think I'll refuse" Ichigo rejected, slightly frowning. It was the first time he spoke in days and his voice croaked in protest. "Thanks for the offer, but I would like to stay in my own house…" He continued, while shifting his eyes to the coffins, which were now being lowered in the family grave. The others shifted their attentions too at the coffins in respect.

Ichigo turned away from the group and leaped to the grave to throw the three white flowers in it. He sadly looked as the flowers whirled in the wind and found their spot on the coffins. He bent down and grabbed some dirt in his hand, clenching it, and threw that also on the coffins. He mumbled another small prayer and shifted his attention back to the others who had been watching him.

"Well Kurosaki-san, then at least accept my invitation for dinner" Urahara said pointedly, "All of you are invited" He added, glancing at Inoue, Sado and Ishida. They nodded, except for Ishida who wanted to decline but quickly got kicked in the shin by Urahara.

Ichigo hesitated, he wanted to be alone but an other part of him didn't. "uhh…" he grunted. "Great, let's go then!" Urahara seized Ichigo by the collar and started dragging him to the exit of the graveyard. "What are you doing, you idiot, I didn't say I would come!" Ichigo protested, while struggling in the man's hold. "Indeed, but you didn't say you wouldn't come" Urahara smirked as he continued to drag the protesting teen with him.

The others smiled, seeing their friend acting 'normal' again.


Everyone ate their meal in silence. Inoue sometimes gave a worried glance at Ichigo, when he was just watching his food. The others noticed too. "Ichigo" Sado said. Ichigo looked up blinking. "Maybe you should eat something" Ichigo didn't respond, he wasn't hungry.

"Maybe? Maybe? I don't think he has a choice!" Jinta fumed "We made this, so HE's gonna eat it!" He continued, while Urahara tapped him on the head. "Calm down, don't be so obnoxious" Jinta huffed and crossed his arms in front of him. "But I do agree. Ichigo, you should eat" Urahara said, grabbing a spoon. He scooped some food off Ichigo's plate and stuffed it in Ichigo's mouth. Ichigo shocked by the cruel act, choked on his food, while Jinta started laughing hysterically.

Ichigo swallowed the big lump of food, glaring at the shop-owner and his evil minion. "What the hell was that for?" he yelled. "I can eat for myself, you know!" He continued.

"Apparently not, Kurosaki-san. Since I just had to feed you." Urahara said, as he again scooped some food on the spoon. Ichigo noticed, "No way, I'm going!" Ichigo shot up and strode to the door.

Sado looked at Urahara, who nodded in response. He slowly got up and went outside to see Ichigo leaning against a wall. He walked to him and gave him a look. "Sorry bout that…" Ichigo said, not meeting his eyes. "I'm …just tired, I think I'll go home" he continued, "Say thanks to Urahara-san" He slowly stood up straight and made his way to leave. "Hmm… I'll walk with you" Sado said, as he searched for Ichigo's eyes. Ichigo only nodded in response.

They silently walked alongside each other. Sado glanced, now and then, down to see if Ichigo was still all right. He looked like he was deep in thought. "Ichigo" Ichigo looked at him, he really looked tired. "You know you can count on me, so… if you need help…" Ichigo interrupted him "Yeah, I know" He gave a small smile and shifted his eyes back to the ground. Sado also smiled. It was just like old times, only this time they would have more problems. But he would try his best to help his friend as much as he can.

They walked further, Ichigo halted. "Chado, isn't this the road to your house?" Sado ignored the 'Chado' "Yes" he answered but continued to walk to Ichigo's house anyway. Ichigo blinked and caught up. "You don't have to walk me to my house, you know" Ichigo snorted, "I can perfectly take care of myself" Sado looked at his friend. "Okay, maybe not…"

They finally neared the house. Ichigo just wanted to turn around and run, but instead he quickened his pace. He didn't watch where he was going. Suddenly he got pulled back at his collar, falling on the cold ground. He looked up, seeing Sado hovered over him. "Are you all right, Ichigo?" He questioned as he offered his hand. "Huh? What happened?" Ichigo asked, grabbing Sado's hand. "You suddenly started to walk faster, didn't you notice the car that was coming?" Ichigo shook his head. "Thank you" he mumbled, maybe it would have been better if the car had hit him. Then he wouldn't have to feel so damn depressed.

They now stood in front of the house; it looked so empty now without the warm lights that always shown at this hour, or the yells that came from the living room when his dad tried to assault his little sisters again. "Do you want me to stay, Ichigo?" Sado interrupted his thoughts again. He glanced back at his taller friend and shook his head. "Nah, it's all right" He grabbed his keys out of his pocket, slightly trembling. Sado nodded his head and turned to leave. Ichigo watched him till he was no more in sight and let out a trembling sigh. He turned back to the door and slowly opened it.

He still remembered the night of the murder. He had opened the door, being met with the sickening smell of blood. They had cleaned the hall now, but he could still see the lines of blood that were on the wall and floor. He walked further, to the living room. The poster of his mom, that his dad always had loved, wasn't there anymore. The picture of his dad flashed in front of his eyes. Blood was smeared over his mom's poster; under it lay his dad, which neck had been turned into a strange angle, while his dead eyes watched his every move. He had been panicking back then, who wouldn't? He didn't run to his father, he knew he was dead already.

He had been more worried for his sisters. He had run through the whole house, yelling his sisters' names. Eventually finding Yuzu on the kitchen floor. Her face was still clenched in pain, but she had already taken her last breath. Her nails were ringed with blood and there were scratches on the wooden floor. You could make out three stab wounds in her back. He had been clinging on her body, wishing she would turn alive again, laughing that sweet, innocent laugh. But it was over. She was dead.

He had been surprised when he heard the small gasp of pain. He had immediately scrambled to the room where the sound came from, finding his last sister, gasping for air. They had cut her throat, but she was still alive. She looked into nothingness as her breathing became more and more rapid. He had ripped his sleeve off, pushing it desperately on the still bleeding cut. "Karin, don't leave me." He had muttered. His sister's eyes had slightly lightened up. "Ichi-nii! Why… can't.. I see you?" She had asked between gasps. He had muttered soothing words at her as respond. Her gasping became worse, while he couldn't help but panic. He started screaming for help, hoping someone would hear him. But no one heard.

"Karin! Who did this!" he remembered, asking her. She had looked him in the eyes, muttering something about shinigami. After that, her gasping stopped and her body stopped trembling, Karin too had died with the rest of his family. He had been screaming after that, screamed till his throat went raw.

He snapped himself out of his thoughts when he felt a big migraine coming up. He started to massage his temples, while stumbling up the stairs. He walked past his own room and knocked the door of his sisters' room open. He tripped over a deserted toy, probably Yuzu's, and fell on one of the beds, slowly drifting in a nightmare-filled sleep.


Omg! I didn't think it would be like this, sorry for killing Ichigo's family! Please tell me what you think. Or maybe some ideas for the next chapter.

I promise that I'll update, but I don't know when the next chapter will come up, cause an important week is coming up, with lots of tests and after that I'm going to Greece, But I'll do my best!

Please R&R