Hey again! So, winter break's over but I've managed on the first week back in school to get a racing fever so I have some time writing on this chapter while babysitting Moses. So, I'm not going to spend so much time babbling in this author's note, that'll only kill my time to write. But thank you all who reviewed! Reviews keep me going.
I never really wanted you to see this screwed-up side of me thay I keep, locked inside of me so deep. "Cold" - Crossfade.
Sam stood up and walked over towards the bookshelf, before he knew it, a hot-white sharp pain sliced its way into his head. He doubled over, gasping in pain as the familiar scensation of a vision crept its way into him. And then he was pulled into the vision.
Sam staggered around in the office, his hand clapsed over his burning eyes and the other hand smashing things to the floor, as he struggled to not fall over. The young hunter was clearly having a real battle with not being pulled into the vision. It was strange, but never before had Sam been able to hold off the vision this long. Sam let out a whimper, as the pain in his head increased and he let the vision consume him.
Sam stumbled and fell flat on the hard-wood floor. He opened his eyes and was relieved that the pain had ceased. Sam blinked a few times before
lifting his head up to see what the vision was about. Sam immediately recognized the familiar room. It was Pastor Jim's chapel. Sam shook his head, trying to get rid of the post-vision headache. He stood up and made out three figures standing at the end of the chapel. Sam took a few long and fast steps towards the people and knew exactly who they were.
His brother Dean was standing against the wall, looking quite annoyed. "I told you, I was driving towards the chapel when I noticed someone lying on the grass in the middle of the cemetery!"
Sam frowned at the odd conversation, as the older pastor spoke up. "So, you decided to simply go and check it out?"
Sam took a few more steps closer to get a better look at his family's faces.
"Well, if you saw a naked person lying in the middle of a cemetery in the dead night, right next to an open grave, wouldn't you think it's just a slight suspicious?" asked his older brother, the sarcasm unavoidable in his angry voice. "So, yes, I went to check it out and that's when I realized it was Sammy. The rest you know."
The words came like a punch, and a lump formed in Sam's throat. Whoa. Wait. What? He had been lying naked in the middle of the cemetery? Sam knitted his brows together and shook his head. This had already happened. This conversation had already happened. He just knew it. And that scared Sam the most.
Sam looked up again, as his father started to pace. "Jim, explanation please?"
Sam felt a rush of gratefulness towards his father, because an explanation would be something Sam'd like to have to. Especially before the vision ended, which it usually did in the wrong time.
The pastor merely shook his head. "This is simply just impossible. People just don't rise from the dead. Unless-"
"I wan't to see him," interrupted his brother suddenly. Dean turned to Jim. "Can I see him?" However, he didn't have time to answer. Dean muttered something Sam was unable to hear and he left the room.
Thousands of thoughts were coursing through Sam's brain and he just stood like frozen. They were talking about him. Sam exhaled sharply and tried to clear his mind, while his father turned to Jim again.
"Unless?" asked the hunter.
"Unless someone brought Sam back," replied Jim with confidence in his voie. "With a resurrection spell."
Sam stumbled backwards, as he took some fast steps away from the two men. The pit in his stomach was growing, and he seriously thought there was some kind of upproar inside of him. The headache was slowly coming back, and Sam was starting to wonder when the damned vision would end.
Thoughts run through his brain as he tried to register what he had just heard. Dean. Pastor Jim. His father. How the hell come no one had told him what had happened to him? He had been dead. Sam had officially and physically been dead. And somehow... part of the revelation wasn't all that surprising. It was like he knew somewhere deep down inside of him that he hadn't really been in the land of the living all the time.
Sam stopped abrubtly, and grabbed the nearest bench, trying to fight of the light-headedness. Everything was spinning as a clear face came infront of him and grabbed his shoulders, pushing him upright. Sam blinked a few times, and his blurry vision cleared revealing his brother standing infront of him looking at him.
"Dean," Sam choked out his brother's name as tears came to his tired eyes.
"You're one of us, Samuel," came the inhuman growl. Sam looked up and was shocked to come face-to-face with a pair of demonic yellow eyes. A small evil smile crept on Dean's handsome face. "You should have never left." Dean pushed Sam against the wall. "Now, this is on you."
"Dean," Sam once again found himself choking on his voice, as tears threatened to fall. Everything was just falling apart. "Dean, I don't understand. What's going on? Where are we?"
Dean let out a small gasp and the yellowness left his eyes, and the chocolate-brown colour was once again back. Sam's eyes widened as he saw something in Dean's eyes that he had never seen before. Fear.
"Sammy," whispered Dean with pleading eyes. Dean lifted his arm and let his hand gently touch Sam's shoulder. "I'm so sorry, all of this is all my fault."
All of the sudden, Sam felt himself lifting off the ground, like he was soaring or floating. And the next thing he was being pulled backwards. Away from everything. Away from Dean. Colours. Darkness. Lightness. And Sam felt himself landing on the cold ground once again. This time it wasn't only Dean's voice that was familiar... it was also his own.
"Dean we gotta do
this." Sam closed his eyes and let himself stay on the
ground, as he heard his brother's voice come into his mind. "No,
Sam. I'm not doing it, dammit. How can you even think about it?"
Sam closed his eyes and let himself stay on the ground, as he heard his brother's voice come into his mind. "No, Sam. I'm not doing it, dammit. How can you even think about it?"
Sam felt a big wave of déjà vu rush through him and he shivered. This conversation had he definitely heard before. Sam remembered now, he had a vision about this. Right before he... Oh god. He had truly died.
"Look at what's
happening to the world," came the tearful response from Sam
himself, as the conversation kept echoing in his head. "The
world is doomed, Dean. Because of me. I shouldn't have come back."
A sharp pain sliced through Sam and his body tensed, as he let out a
small gasp. Let it be over. New images suddenly filled Sam's
mind. "You don't understand do you, Dean Winchester?" came
another familiar voice. "You might've just unleashed a terrible
evil into this world. Now you and your brother must stand for that."
Sam groaned in pain. No. Wake me up. Agony. Pain. Horror. "This
is all on you." Screaming. Famine. Death. Evil. No! Someone help
me... wake me up... Someone wake me up...
New images suddenly filled Sam's mind. "You don't understand do you, Dean Winchester?" came another familiar voice. "You might've just unleashed a terrible evil into this world. Now you and your brother must stand for that." Sam groaned in pain. No. Wake me up. Agony. Pain. Horror. "This is all on you." Screaming. Famine. Death. Evil. No! Someone help me... wake me up... Someone wake me up...
Dean swore under his breath as he jumped out of the low-class truck that the mechanic had borrowed him. One of his best trucks had it apparently been. Dean snorted. Best truck my ass! Dean shut the door to the truck and turnd around, not all that surprised to come face to face with his father who was putting down some of his shutguns in the trunk of his truck.
"So, you're finally leaving?" asked Dean and walked slowly towards the car. He knew after all that his father was leaving, he had no intention to stay now when Sam was okay again.
"Yeah," replied John and closed the back truck. "I figured I'd stay to try and find out how Sam really got back. I mean, who might've been the one to perform that ritual." Dean looked away, trying not feel guilty that he wasn't feeling guilty since it was actually Dean who had brough Sam back. "You know, maybe it might've been the demon." Dean looked up. "But I don't think it was..." John took a few steps closer and looked directly into his oldest son's eyes. "I hope you know what you might've done here."
Dean gave a small and sad smile. Stupid of him to think that his father couldn't see right through him after all these years. He could always figure me out after all. John jumped into the truck and turned to Dean one last time.
"Explain to Sammy, would you?" said John with an unreadable expression. "Explain to him why I couldn't stay."
Dean nodded solemnly. "Take care of yourself, Dad."
"You two look after each other," said John gravely and pushed the pedal and drove away.
Dean exhaled the breath he had been holding for a few seconds. Dean had a feeling that things were going to get worse than they already were. Much more worse. Dean turned on his kneels and walked across the cemetery towards the chapel. He opened the back door and stepped in to see Pastor Jim standing by the disk in the kitchen.
"Dean, there you are," said Jim and filled up two cups of coffee. "I was just making some coffee. Would you like some?"
"Um, no thanks, Jim," muttered Dean and cleared his throat.
Jim noticed the distressed expression on the young man and immediately questioned it. "Everything alright, Dean?" Dean looked down, feeling slightly awkward. The saddness in Dean's eyes were hard to miss. "Ah... Jonathan left, didn't he?"
Dean just gave a small nod.
Dean didn't need to answer, Jim knew it anyway. "Dean, there's something you need to know about your father, that I'm not so sure you've understood. He loves you and Samuel more than anything in this world. You know that, right?"
"Yeah," came the hoarse reply from Dean.
Dean knew he was being slightly childish with acting like this over his father leaving. The point was, his father had always been on hunts and jobs for weeks and Dean knew he was alright, however, something felt more different now.
"So, how did it go with the car?" asked Jim and took a sip of his smoking-hot coffee.
"As sucky as expected," said Dean casually and Jim simply just rolled his eyes at the young huner. "Seriously, Pastor, I like this town and all, but your mechanics sucks." Jim gave a small smile. Dean looked around in the small kitchen and threw a glance into the empty chapel next door and frowned when he didn't see his brother. Dean turned back to Jim with a questioning frown. "Where's Sam?"
Jim let the cup fall from his lips and swallowed the coffee. "Mm, he's still in the office. I left in with some paper work. He seemed restless." Jim put the cup down. "And he babbled."
Typical Sammy. "That's our Sam." Dean walked across the kitchen towards the hallway, and turned to Jim before leaving. "Paper work, huh? I think that made him even more restless."
"It sure did," nodded Jim. "Hence the coffee."
Dean snorted and exited the kitchen, heading straight for Jim's office. However, as he entered the office he saw something that made his heart stop and the blood in his veins freeze to ice. Sam was lying in the middle of the office, his eyes closed, and his expression vacant.
"Sam?" asked Dean in a soft tone, hoping that it would just a big misunderstanding or something. Sam didn't respond, and for the first time since the accident Dean felt a wave of panic run through him and he was once again faced with the possibility of losing his little brother.
"Sammy!" choked Dean out in desperation and rushed over to his brother and kneeled next him. Dean rolled Sam's head towards him and pulled Sam's limp form against him and cradled him to his chest. "Sam? Can you hear me?" asked Dean in panic as he felt Sam's cheek and winced at the coldness of his baby brother's skin. "Sam, open your eyes! Open your eyes, dammit!" Dean let a pair of shaky fingers reach over at his neck and a tsunami of agony washed over him as he felt no pulse.
This can't be happening. I just got him back. I just got him back! Dean mentally kicked himself for not starting CPR and gently lowered Sam to the ground and tilted his head backwards, trying to not let the familiar scene get to him.
"You are not doing this, you hear me? You are not fucking doing this again," mumbled Dean angrily and blew two breaths into Sam's lungs and then started to do compressions.
Come on breathe. Breathe, dammit. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. Damn you, Sammy. Breathe!
Dean bend over and blew another two lungful of air into Sam, and then went back to pushing on his chest. "Come on, you can do it. I know you can." Dean was just about to think that his words of encouragement had absolutely no effect, that was until Sam suddenly inhaled sharply and he was back. "That's it, little brother, that's it. Slow breaths, now. Slow breathes." Dean felt a wave of relief course through his body. This had been too close. Too damn close.
Dean wrapped his arms around Sam's shoulders, as Sam took a few shaky breathes and slowly opened his eyes. "Dean...?" came the hoarse whisper.
Dean threw his head backwards and took a few deep breaths himself. "Jesus, Sammy, you're a real fan of the non-oxygen thing, aren't you?"
Sam blinked a few times before finally looking up into Dean's eyes, and Dean frowned as he saw betrayal and hurt in Sam's eyes. "Why?" asked Sam quietly, as he still struggled to breathe evenly. "Why didn't you tell me?" Dean just shook his head in confusion. "I was supposed to be dead."
Dean froze in his place, as Sam looked at him accusingly. "Sammy..." came the agonized whisper from Dean.
Sam just shook his head and licked his dry lips.. "Dean, you have no idea what this means, do you? You shouldn't have brought me back. Now we all might be in danger." Sam pushed Dean away and shakingly stood up.
Sam swayed slightly, but grapped onto the wall for support waiting for the veritgo to pass. Dean took a step closer, an expression of worry aching on his scared face. "Sam, you need to let me explain this to you," said Dean defensively.
Sam shook his head and trembled slightly, the recent visions still spooking. "I get it, Dean." Sam turned to his brother and Dean was shocked to see tears forming in Sam's eyes. "I really do get it. I died... you wanted me alive again. But did you even think of the consequences?"
Dean pursed his lips angrily and snapped, "Sam, don't lecture me alright? We don't need to talk about this now!"
"No!" yelled Sam angrily and shoved some paper to the ground in rage. "I wouldn't get it either if I were you. But I've seen it, this resurrection spell, we might've doomed us all."
Dean swallowed hard and Sam slumped his shoulders and sat down and silenced consumed the both thoughtful brothers.
If you're reading this, I suppose you've read the chapter. So big thank you! And please leave a review:D