Title: Best Served Cold
Author: Ellie
Rating: G
Summary: "But I'd take two more of him before I'd hire Lambeth to wash windows."
Spoilers: "Sleeping Dogs Lie"
Author's Notes: Inspired by Cuddy's comments to Cameron, as well as the "valley girl" version of the same scene, and stylistically by Hemingway's "Hills Like White Elephants."


Cuddy rubbed her temples and frowned before answering the phone, not recognizing the number on the caller ID.


"Hi! How've you been?"

"Really? Hopkins? Congratulations, that's wonderful!"

"Yes, I've been here about six years."

"Busy, as I'm sure you're discovering."

"Yes, it is."

"Of course, I'd be happy to help if I can."

"Yes. I worked with him during my residency, before he went to GW."

"You were in cardiology at the time. You know how things were between the two of us."

"Exactly! The Byatt case. If he would have killed that girl if I hadn't spoken to Eliot before he could go through with the treatment. Then he tried to play it off…"

"No, I didn't."

"She's lucky to have survived. As it was she lost half the function. Still, she sends me a card every Christmas."

"I don't."

"No, never."

"Do you remember Greg House?"

"He works for me now as a diagnostician. He causes eighty percent of the hospital's lawsuits while seeing less than one percent of the patients. But I'd take two more of him before I'd hire Lambeth to wash windows."

"Yes, really!"

"Definitely, just let me know."

"No, thank you, Steve. Good luck with your search."

She hung up the phone with a smile. Fumbling under the desk with her stocking feet, she found her shoes and slid her feet into the red crocodile Manolo Blahniks before walking to the clinic to find Dr. House. At least she could anticipate his treachery.