A/N: This is my first CSI NY fic, and the second thing I've written in 5 years. Hope this works out fine. Please bear in mind that English is not my native tongue. Takes place after "Love Run Cold"

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I told her I was willing to give it a try, but she said she couldn't.

I told her I'd be in the lab if she needed anything. Turns out, she needed a lot, but she didn't come looking for me at the lab, and the need grew too big to be ignored.

I used to call her Montana, and I would have loved to call her mine ever since I saw her at the zoo that first time. Now I never call her Monroe, and I'm hers, for all it's worth.

I used to think she'd fall for me easily, but I was me who ended up falling hard for her.

I used to think that once I opened up to her, she'd let me in. I did, and she ended up closing up and keeping me at bay.

I pleaded her to give us a chance, and she said she didn't want to hurt me. Yet hurt was all I got to see in her eyes the day I met her past.

I told myself I'd give my right arm if that would make her happy. I had to give up my left one in order to make her safe.

I told her I was willing to risk it all should she give me a chance. She said she didn't want to rip my heart out. I thought she was just trying to be nice. Turns out she was telling the truth and my heart did get ripped out by the knife her ex-husband attacked us with.

I said that I would die for her, and that's just what I did. At least, Hawkes said I died for 3 minutes on the way to the hospital, and I died yet again on the operation table. If she hadn't made it, I know now I would have died for sure.

She much later confessed she never had had the courage to end things with the ape that gave her the Monroe and a history of black eyes and broken bones. In the end, it was my bones breaking in the hands of her ex that gave her the courage to finally put an end to him.

Internal Affairs took one look at us and said that it was justified use of force. She had to force herself to take one look at me. She later told Stella she could justify everything, except the ease with which she had put four bullets in him.

She knows she drove me crazy by keeping me away. I know now that her ex's harassment was driving her crazy: he had never gotten over the fact that she'd gotten away, and that made him a crazy, dangerous man.

She survived three years with him and managed to make a fresh start far away. I managed to survive 10 minutes of his homicidal rage. I love Montana to death and I have the fucking scars to prove it.

Now she knows that till death do us apart is more than just a fabricated lie. She knows I mean it. I went to hell and back to rest my case.

And case closed it was. It was Montana's case. Not Monroe. Never again Monroe.

She's Lindsay Messer now, wedding band and all, for all the world to see. To me she'll always be Montana. Forever mine.

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A/N2: Please close the door quietly on your way out. If you like it and think I should try this again, please let me now. Same goes if you think I should never try this again. Thank you.