Revised Techniques by Trisar Alvein

YOU ASKED FOR IT! You asked for it!

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

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Ryoga wished he'd been awake for the transition, but somehow Ranma had changed his... her... its tune, agreeing to the marriage. Ryoga wasn't exactly thrilled with it himself, but had resigned himself to his fate. After all, he hadn't been able to escape that cell no matter how hard he tried, and he'd watched every attempt Ranma herself had made fail, and the Saotome was, after all, the better fighter—Ryoga hated to admit it, but he hadn't much evidence to the contrary.

But now, the redhead was not only agreeing to the marriage, she seemed bubbly, cheery, and overall delighted with the concept.

He wished he knew what was with that huge lump on her head, though, and continued to wonder this from his position in the living room of his home, alone with his 'betrothed,' even as she bounded toward him.

"Oh, Ryoga my darling!" she cooed, latching onto his side with a grip that would out-do a hydraulic press. "Aren't you so glad? We'll be able to be married soon! Then, it'll be just you and me..." Her bright and beaming smile turned downright sultry.

Ryoga managed to resist turning green. Barely. Ranma's enthusiam to get married was almost equal to her earlier hatred of the thought.

"Look, Ranma, um, are you really sure this is what you want? I mean, I thought you'd be against this!" Ryoga protested weakly. He knew intently that Ranma was a man, and the concept of marrying a man filled him with mixtures of horror and disgust—not because he was against others doing it, but simply because the thought of doing it himself was horrifying. The weak protests, however, came from the fact that whatever his mind was telling him, his body insisted that there was a daringly cute, devilishly sexy, foxy little redhead pressing herself into him. A redhead dressed in a new v-neck blouse that dipped even lower than her old one, nearly reaching her navel, allowing her to press her remarkable assets against the part of his forearm left exposed by his shirt.

"Oh, I was, but then I thought about it for a bit after I hit my head and calmed down. I mean, why shouldn't I want to marry you? You're strong, a good fighter, and the fact that you can get us lost whenever you want means we'll have the best vacations ever!" fizzed the bubbly redhead. "Plus you're nice and sweet when you want to be, so I know you'd treat me right!"

"Hit your head?"

Ranma nodded. "Yup! I tried to get out by charging into the door with my head. Pretty silly, huh?"

"Heh, yeah, silly," agreed Ryoga, finding with a growing unease that he couldn't lever the very strength Ranma had just mentioned enough to break free of her grip. It wasn't a reluctance or desire not to hurt her, it was simple physical fact that he couldn't seem to lever himself free. In fact, his every attempt just seemed to TIGHTEN her grip on him. "How are you doing that?"

"I'll only tell you if you call me 'dear,' darling," was the reply.

Ryoga suppressed another mixed wave of nausea and desire at that thought. A blow to the head had done it, which meant a blow to the head might reverse it as well. It could work! But how to escape?

"Don't you love me enough to say just that one word, maybe hold me too?" pouted the neo-girl.

That was it! His captive arm had just enough range of motion to be able to slip around her waist and pull her closer to him. That kind of position would also weaken the leverage she had against him, freeing his other arm completely.

'Except that with her reflexes, there's no way I'll be able to hit her before she blocks it,' he realized nervously. 'Unless she never sees it coming!'

Managing to hold back the urge to gag, just barely, he put his arm around her waist, causing her to giggle with delight and press herself against him, her new position forcing her to release his other arm. Swallowing his nervousness, his pride, and his desire to vomit, he managed to crack a sickly grin as she smiled adoringly at him. "C-c-cl-close your e-eyes?" he stuttered out. Beaming brightly, she did just that, and assuming his intentions, also tilted her head back slightly.

Lifting back one arm, he firmed his resolve again, targeting the exact center of the lump on her head that was already present. Closing his eyes, he steeled himself. 'Come on, Ryoga, you have to do this. You have to!' He was ready. He was prepared. He was...

SMOOCH!

...apparently taking too long, as when he opened his eyes at the feel of lips on his, Ranma had taken matters into her own hands, leaping up to kiss him fully on the lips, her arms going around his neck. Even as he felt her tongue slip into his mouth, he saw a flash of light, and glanced over to the side to see Nabiki lowering her camera with a devil's smirk.

'My life is hell,' he cried mentally.

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Fin.

YOU ASKED FOR IT! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!